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  #11  
Old 10-05-2016, 07:27 AM
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jackfaire jackfaire is offline
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Originally Posted by XCashier View Post
And bullying is seriously frowned upon now, there are anti-bullying programs as well. At least, that's the case at my son's school, I don't know how it is in the rest of the country.
Genuine question as I have been wondering all bullying or only the socially unacceptable kind?

In my area they have a lot of "anti-bullying" stuff that ignores any bullying that's based on "correcting" the socially awkward kid's lack of fitting in. Most of the anti-bullying at my daughter's school targets and penalizes kids who most need help and are bullying to lash out but completely ignores any bullying that stems from the "popular" kids picking on the unpopular kids.
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Old 10-05-2016, 06:25 PM
Estil Estil is offline
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Oh yes, like in that whole boy wearing a My Little Pony backpack incident, the schools can print up all the glossy brochures and posters and whatnot claiming to be anti-bullying but far too often in practice (as was in the case for me both at school and even among my so-called "parents") that they blame the victim and treat them like they "asked for it" or "provoked" the bully/abuser, and that bullying is perfectly alright as long as they're "enforcers" of societal norms.

Even back then I felt like in practice, the bullies ruled the roost. I didn't understand why these supposed college educated experience professional "leaders" (who I thought were educated/trained to know exactly what to do about these sorts of things), again in practice really tolerated bullying.

The same goes for the workforce. They couldn't care less about abuse and bullying in the workplace, unless it's something they might get sued over. That is, unless it's unlawful discrimination or sexual harassment or they try to force you to do something illegal, you're pretty much SOL. You have not only at-will laws to thank for that but even labor unions (who are traditionally supposed to "stand up for the little guy") who turn out to be incompetent or even hostile towards those union members they don't like (*raises hand from personal experience*) can be even worse.
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Old 10-05-2016, 09:17 PM
s_stabeler s_stabeler is offline
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There's a simple explanation. Prior to the College/University level, many teachers are there because it's a job- that is, to them, it's about earning a paycheck. hence, when things get complicated, they look for the easiest solution- which is to get the person complaining to shut up. ( to give one example, one teacher I had ignored a bully yelling something in my face literally right under the teacher's nose because he couldn't be arsed to enforce discipline.) It's why you get policies like teachers not bothering to punish bullies under the theory of " I didn't see it, so i can't prove it, so i can't punish them"- which, incidentally, is why I am always infuriated by people that blame kids for " not wanting to be a snitch" and say that is why nothing is done about bullying. when telling a teacher about bullying often means the bullies go unpunished while the kid who reported the bullying gets bullied even worse, it is scarcely surprising that kids don't bother.
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Old 10-05-2016, 09:23 PM
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" not wanting to be a snitch" and say that is why nothing is done about bullying. when telling a teacher about bullying often means the bullies go unpunished while the kid who reported the bullying gets bullied even worse, it is scarcely surprising that kids don't bother.
There is a darker side to this too. If a kid who is being abused at home is told by that same teacher during the 'bad touch" lessons that they can come tell the teacher the student won't believe that teacher if the teacher does nothing about bullying.

The kid's thoughts "Telling you about my bully made the bullying worse so clearly telling you about the abuse would do the same"
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