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This is 'blaming the victim'?
Old 09-17-2018, 05:48 PM
Pixelated Pixelated is offline
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 72
Default This is 'blaming the victim'?

Post on my FB page from somebody asking if anybody else finds it "weird" when a person compliments another person's skin. The OP is asking because it *always* upsets her when this happens, since she is apparently extremely conscious of what her skin looks like (I should add she's currently receiving some kind of treatment and ATM, at least, she looks AWFUL. Presumably she will look better when she's done ...)

I said all that I could think of was that you can't control other people's actions but you can control your REactions ... to which she responded no, you can't; once you've been totally crushed by somebody, you can't control how you respond to them ever again (or presumably anybody else?) I said you are letting those people live rent-free in your head, which they don't deserve.

After which I got the "Thanks for blaming the victim" comment.

Well, look, lady, if YOU can't control your reactions, who can? There are bullies and asshats everywhere. Nothing stops these people EXCEPT the lack of a reaction on the part of the victim.

Anyway ... I got out of the discussion because, rightly or wrongly, it was starting to sound as if I was trying to converse with a voluntarily perpetual victim.
Insults are the arguments employed by those who are in the wrong.
~ Jean-Jacques Rousseau
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