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I can't decide if I'm being selfish here, or if the other person is.
My husband and I had a very, very small and quiet wedding when we got married. We didn't want a big party or ceremony, so we asked a justice of the peace to marry us at his precinct and we invited one friend, B, along to be witness and take some pics.
After the ceremony itself, the three of us went out to lunch, and we were joined by another friend of ours, T. T didn't even know that we were getting married. She had called us the night before and let us know she was going to be in town for the afternoon and asked if we were free to go to lunch. When we all got to the restaurant, we told T that we had gotten married and she was ecstatic for us. She bought lunch for both my husband and I, and of course her own bill.
I sort of feel like B was being a little stingy. He didn't offer to pay anything extra besides his own meal, not even part of the tip. We didn't make a big deal out of the wedding, but that doesn't mean the day wasn't at all special. Before T offered to take our check, my husband had his credit card out to pay for it. The place we ate at was not overly expensive (I think lunch is around $10 each there, so not the cheapest place around, but certainly not the most expensive, and it's a buffet so it's all you can eat) and B is well enough off that it's not like he couldn't afford it. He goes out to lunch practically every day of the week, including weekends, is usually bugging my husband and I to go out to dinner and a movie with him (which he'll go to regardless of whether we want to go with him) and has very little, if any, debt. He makes more than T does, too.
I feel kind of selfish myself for thinking he should have contributed more, since we didn't ask for anything and didn't have a big ceremony. At the same time, I think it was kind of selfish of B to not even offer part of the tip. I honestly don't know if or how he tips when he goes out to eat. I have only ever gone out with him a couple of times, and we always get separate checks and pay with credit cards, so I've never seen what kind of a tip he normally leaves, if any.
My husband and I had a very, very small and quiet wedding when we got married. We didn't want a big party or ceremony, so we asked a justice of the peace to marry us at his precinct and we invited one friend, B, along to be witness and take some pics.
After the ceremony itself, the three of us went out to lunch, and we were joined by another friend of ours, T. T didn't even know that we were getting married. She had called us the night before and let us know she was going to be in town for the afternoon and asked if we were free to go to lunch. When we all got to the restaurant, we told T that we had gotten married and she was ecstatic for us. She bought lunch for both my husband and I, and of course her own bill.
I sort of feel like B was being a little stingy. He didn't offer to pay anything extra besides his own meal, not even part of the tip. We didn't make a big deal out of the wedding, but that doesn't mean the day wasn't at all special. Before T offered to take our check, my husband had his credit card out to pay for it. The place we ate at was not overly expensive (I think lunch is around $10 each there, so not the cheapest place around, but certainly not the most expensive, and it's a buffet so it's all you can eat) and B is well enough off that it's not like he couldn't afford it. He goes out to lunch practically every day of the week, including weekends, is usually bugging my husband and I to go out to dinner and a movie with him (which he'll go to regardless of whether we want to go with him) and has very little, if any, debt. He makes more than T does, too.
I feel kind of selfish myself for thinking he should have contributed more, since we didn't ask for anything and didn't have a big ceremony. At the same time, I think it was kind of selfish of B to not even offer part of the tip. I honestly don't know if or how he tips when he goes out to eat. I have only ever gone out with him a couple of times, and we always get separate checks and pay with credit cards, so I've never seen what kind of a tip he normally leaves, if any.
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