Understanding but not...

[Mytical]

Ok I've warned that I can not always put in words what I am thinking, so I am hoping that this makes sense.

Understanding and Comprehending. I am never sure which is which. Let me give an example.

The Alpha male mindset. I grasp the concept behind it, know why some people might think the way they do, but I just can not grasp what would drive somebody to act that way.

So do I understand it, but not comprehend it..

or do I comprehend it, but not understand it..

or something else entirely.

There are a lot of things I grasp, like jealousy, but just can not fathom why people would act the way they act...

[Greenday]

I think what you are talking about is understanding, but not comprehending. dictionary.com says...I think yes.

understand - have knowledge of
comprehend - not only have knowledge of, but it makes clear sense

[Boozy]

What I'm hearing is that you understand that people think differently than you do, and that causes them to behave differently. But because their logic is different than your own, their way of thinking will never completely make sense to you. Is that right?

[Andara Bledin]

Boozy, I think you both understand and comprehend the matter at hand.

I'm in the same boat. I can understand that people do certain things, but I can't for the life of me wrap my brain around why they think that those things are desirable.

^-.-^

[blas87]

I feel similar...I can understand but not excuse behaviors or ways of thinking.

[Mytical]

You are right Boozy. Sorry had no internet for a couple of days. Like Jealousy, or SC behavior, or any other number of concepts. I can understand the thought process behind them, but just can not fathom why people would act the way they act. I don't know if it is by choice (ie I don't WANT to know) or by nature (it is impossible for me to know) however.

[Mytical]

Ok..recently I've discovered another thing I just .. don't get. People paying several hundred thousand for a vehicle..or anything really similar. Where there is a perfectly viable, reasonable, and economical alternative to something..but people go out and basically throw away money. I don't begrudge them it, I just couldn't do it .. even if I was a billionaire.

Like..a gold commode. Why? I just..it doesn't..huh? Somebody please explain it to me...please?

[Andara Bledin]

Keeping up with the Joneses, rich edition, mostly.

Although, in some cases, the cost comes from rarity, not just a name.

There are a few limited edition very rare cars out there that I would love to be able to afford. Sure, there are alternatives that can do similar, but there's something to be said for the warm fuzzies that come from having something indisputably special.

But something like wanting a designer handbag is something I just don't get. I've seen a lot of these things, and most of them are hideous, and they're mass-produced to the point where aside from the label, there isn't actually anything special about them except for the fact that someone shelled out the dough to have the label, or "got a bargain" on what is most likely a fake. Either way, I just can't find it in me to be anything remotely close to impressed.

^-.-^

[Boozy]

But something like wanting a designer handbag is something I just don't get. I've seen a lot of these things, and most of them are hideous, and they're mass-produced to the point where aside from the label, there isn't actually anything special about them except for the fact that someone shelled out the dough to have the label, or "got a bargain" on what is most likely a fake.

You can't understand why people buy designer handbags because (I'm assuming) you're not into fashion or textiles. For people that do like those things, a high-quality handbag is a nice treat.

I like my handbags more than my nicest clothes, because I actually get to handle them and look at them frequently throughout the day.

I suspect most of the "designer" bags you've seen are fakes, if you can't see anything special about them. Or perhaps you just haven't looked closely at them. The workmanship and materials on a top-end designer bag are very special, and worth it if you like that sort of thing.

[Andara Bledin]

No, I've seen quite a number of real designer handbags. The old Boss' wife and the Bosslady's daughter are both into status symbols. The one the old Boss' wife got was some god-awful thing with an obnoxious print (it wasn't anything decorative, just the designer's logo plastered all over the thing in noxious colors just to make sure everybody knew just how much was spent to acquire the thing). And this wasn't even a full purse, it was just a clutch.

Considering how often most "keeping up" people change their handbags, it doesn't make any difference how well made they are; they're going to be replaced as soon as the season changes because they wouldn't be caught dead with last season's design.

Speaking of the old Boss' wife and her status symbols, she'd get the same make of car every time, and get a new one every other year. Despite the fact that the make she chose broke down on the order of about once every two months. But it was fancy, and everybody knew it was expensive, and by gum, she was going to let everybody know that she was a woman of means.

The bosslady's daughter, on the other hand, is just a shallow trend-follower who idolizes people like Paris Hilton, who are famous for being famous and not because they have shown themselves to be talented. Luckily for her, there's an entire industry in this area built around being seen and following the latest trends, so she's got a fancy job surrounded by the 'pretty people.' I guess that is a step up from her former plan of finding a rich guy to marry.

^-.-^

[Hyena Dandy]

Here's one thing I don't comprehend.

Jealousy. I could never get upset at someone I care about having sex with other people. I just don't comprehend people getting angry over it. Now, if you're in a relationship you assume to be closed, and someone goes and has sex with someone you don't know, then I can see being upset. I just don't know why you would WANT the relationship to be closed. If it is, and they cheat, that's breaking your trust and confidence. And that's upsetting. I just don't get why it should be in the first place...

I tried to get mom to explain it to me, but she just said I was unromantic and disrespectful and would understand when I'm older. I'm 21 years old, and I've been through several relationships. I'd kind of like to understand NOW.

[Andara Bledin]

Re: Jealousy
It's a survival trait, actually. There is a period where a mated couple will stay together that is supposed to last long enough to raise up a child enough that it will no longer require the presence of both parents in order to survive.

Re: Monogamy
This is a political and religious imposition created in order to control the masses (and their money/possessions) and create a more clear-cut line of succession from generation to generation for a variety of reasons. The vast majority of traditional cultures appear to have been polygamous (multiple wives) in nature. Polygamous societies actually favor women, as the men with the most resources can then take care of several women, so the "less desirable" women could become attached to "more desirable" men, whereas otherwise, they would have to settle for "less desirable" men, and in some cases, no men at all, as women outnumber men.

An interesting article at Patriarchy Website on the history of monogamy from a pro-Israel standpoint
Another article at the blog Practical Polyamory on both monogamy and jealousy

^-.-^

[AdminAssistant]

To me, there's nothing nicer than a simple, black Coach bag. I just don't have the $$$ for one. Although, the luxury item I'd rather have? A Burberry coat. Those things are gorgeous.

[Andara Bledin]

There are some very attractive Coach bags for less than $100. This Prada clutch, however, is over $1700. For essentially the same thing with a fancier label.

There is probably nothing that will convince me that this bag is functionally worth nearly $7000.

^-.-^

[Mytical]

Hyena Dandy I am the same way when it comes to jealousy. Somebody once flat out said "That just means you want to sleep around." No..no I don't. If I do not or can not meet the needs of my partner, I just don't mind if they get those needs met somewhere else.

As for designer goods, for those who want it and get it..that is great..just don't personally understand it. I am the $10 shoes, $3-5 t-shirt, etc type person. *chuckles*