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I've ranted about my parents before. Time for another thread about them. The babies thread that Jack started made me think of all this, for some reason.
Looking back at my childhood, my parents didn't have a lot of time for me. When I was about 7, my dad decided to quit his job and start his own business. Except he decided to start it in Michigan, about 3 hours away from where we lived (in Wisconsin.) For whatever reason my parents decided not to move. Instead, my dad bought a very small house in the area where he was building his business, and he lived there during the week and would come home on the weekends. Thus, I saw him very little most of the time.
My mom pined for him. I understand that it must have absolutely sucked to be apart from him for so long and so often; but I don't understand why we didn't just move. My mom didn't have a job (she was a stay at home mom once my brothers were born) so the only thing attaching us to the community was their parents (who they despise) and me and my schooling. I hated the school I went to and they knew it, I didn't have a lot of friends, so I'll never understand why they didn't just move. Even today they complain about being "stuck" in the same town all their lives and how much they hate the town and wish they would have gotten out of there. Then why didn't they??
Anyway, my mom spent every night on the phone with my dad, usually 2-3 hours, sometimes more. Sometimes she wouldn't even prepare dinner for us because she was too busy talking to my dad, and then when I'd say I was hungry, or go to open a can of tuna to make a sandwich or something, she'd scream at me, "I suppose you think I'm an awful mother because it's 10pm and we haven't eaten dinner yet, huh!?" To a 9 year old, yeah, that's kinda confusing.
We lived out in the country, a good several miles from town, with very few neighbors, so I had next to no social interaction with anyone outside of school -- which, as I said, I didn't like in the first place. I never learned how to ride a bike, so I had no way to get into town. My parents never bothered teaching me, and when my neighbor friends offered to teach me, my mom blew a gasket and said I wasn't allowed to let them teach me, because riding a bike should be something that your parents teach you, not your neighbors. I still don't know how to ride a bike, to this day.
We did have one relatively close neighbor who had kids around my age, but they and I had a pretty harsh falling out a year or two after my dad's business started up and I stopped talking to them for many years. So I was left to my own devices. We got a computer, and I started chatting online with other nerds like me. When I started spending more time online than anything else, my mom got pissed about that too, and more than once, she tried to ban me from talking to my friends. Even after I became an adult (around 21 years old) and had bought my own laptop, she and I got in a horrible, horrible fight over someone who I knew online, who she didn't "approve" of, and she said that he'd "stolen" me away from her. So she tried to take my laptop, and threatened to throw it in the nearby lake. I had to literally cling to it until my dad managed to pry her off of me, to keep her from taking it.
I dunno why I'm rambling about this all now. My parents are coming to see me, they'll be here on Sunday. I haven't seen them in over a year and a half. Frankly, I don't really want to see them. Part of my is excited that they're coming, but a bigger part of me is anxious, nervous, and just plain doesn't want them here. I think it'll go okay, I have been on my own and living with my husband for over 2 years now and I think they know that they can't bully me anymore. But part of me is really afraid of what might happen next week.
Looking back at my childhood, my parents didn't have a lot of time for me. When I was about 7, my dad decided to quit his job and start his own business. Except he decided to start it in Michigan, about 3 hours away from where we lived (in Wisconsin.) For whatever reason my parents decided not to move. Instead, my dad bought a very small house in the area where he was building his business, and he lived there during the week and would come home on the weekends. Thus, I saw him very little most of the time.
My mom pined for him. I understand that it must have absolutely sucked to be apart from him for so long and so often; but I don't understand why we didn't just move. My mom didn't have a job (she was a stay at home mom once my brothers were born) so the only thing attaching us to the community was their parents (who they despise) and me and my schooling. I hated the school I went to and they knew it, I didn't have a lot of friends, so I'll never understand why they didn't just move. Even today they complain about being "stuck" in the same town all their lives and how much they hate the town and wish they would have gotten out of there. Then why didn't they??
Anyway, my mom spent every night on the phone with my dad, usually 2-3 hours, sometimes more. Sometimes she wouldn't even prepare dinner for us because she was too busy talking to my dad, and then when I'd say I was hungry, or go to open a can of tuna to make a sandwich or something, she'd scream at me, "I suppose you think I'm an awful mother because it's 10pm and we haven't eaten dinner yet, huh!?" To a 9 year old, yeah, that's kinda confusing.
We lived out in the country, a good several miles from town, with very few neighbors, so I had next to no social interaction with anyone outside of school -- which, as I said, I didn't like in the first place. I never learned how to ride a bike, so I had no way to get into town. My parents never bothered teaching me, and when my neighbor friends offered to teach me, my mom blew a gasket and said I wasn't allowed to let them teach me, because riding a bike should be something that your parents teach you, not your neighbors. I still don't know how to ride a bike, to this day.
We did have one relatively close neighbor who had kids around my age, but they and I had a pretty harsh falling out a year or two after my dad's business started up and I stopped talking to them for many years. So I was left to my own devices. We got a computer, and I started chatting online with other nerds like me. When I started spending more time online than anything else, my mom got pissed about that too, and more than once, she tried to ban me from talking to my friends. Even after I became an adult (around 21 years old) and had bought my own laptop, she and I got in a horrible, horrible fight over someone who I knew online, who she didn't "approve" of, and she said that he'd "stolen" me away from her. So she tried to take my laptop, and threatened to throw it in the nearby lake. I had to literally cling to it until my dad managed to pry her off of me, to keep her from taking it.
I dunno why I'm rambling about this all now. My parents are coming to see me, they'll be here on Sunday. I haven't seen them in over a year and a half. Frankly, I don't really want to see them. Part of my is excited that they're coming, but a bigger part of me is anxious, nervous, and just plain doesn't want them here. I think it'll go okay, I have been on my own and living with my husband for over 2 years now and I think they know that they can't bully me anymore. But part of me is really afraid of what might happen next week.
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