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  • #16
    Originally posted by LadyMage View Post
    oh and those griping about me iding people, you should see my illegal drug policy, its even stricter
    Personally, I think anyone who would cry over you asking for ID at your wet parties should just go find themselves another party and inflict themselves on someone else.

    They likely drove to get there, they should have ID on them, so they can suck it up and follow the rules.

    ^-.-^
    Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

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    • #17
      While I will admit that the policy of IDing people at a house party seems odd to me (I grew up in an area where it wasn't uncommon for parents to buy booze for high school graduation parties), I see nothing wrong with it in the slightest. Basically, your house, your rules, end of story. People need to cover their asses when legal issues could arise, and it's better to think ahead and plan rather than wing it and hope for the best.

      Also, you gave plenty of warning to your party-goers that they would be required to show ID. If anyone didn't like that policy, they had plenty of time to decide not to attend. If you're considered the bartender in the eyes of the law because the party was being held at your house, then it only makes sense to act like a bartender in every sense of the word

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      • #18
        Originally posted by LadyMage View Post
        even if the law said they had too? honestly I think its silly to be upset over something like showing an id, even at a friends party but if that's how you feel, stick with my dry parties if you are ever in town, cause save the mild joke, my wet party was a huge success with no drama, damage, or arrests so I don't intend to change anything when it comes to those rules
        I was talking in general terms. Since the law says you have to and holds you liable, I can't blame you and your friends for having this rule. However, if there were no laws and someone tried to ID me, I would be a little alieniated.

        As I said, the suck lies with the law for being so strict.

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        • #19
          Originally posted by Rageaholic View Post
          I was talking in general terms. Since the law says you have to and holds you liable, I can't blame you and your friends for having this rule. However, if there were no laws and someone tried to ID me, I would be a little alieniated.

          As I said, the suck lies with the law for being so strict.
          but how would you be alienated, if EVERYONE is being ided then it seems to be the opposite to me, and I personally think the suck lies with the stupid teens that drank and destroyed things which made the law happen in the first place

          I've been to enough wet parties that did this in many areas that I don't see it as a reason to get angry about it, even if they know you would you rather they give someone special treatment or be treated the same regardless?
          I'm a happy, well adjusted emotinally disturbed person, who can't spell

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          • #20
            I would still think it would be strange to have to show your ID even if everyone else had to. (I assume everyone else would have to show their ID). I've been to many houseparties and never had witnessed a rule in place (then again, I don't drink).

            As I said, I think it's understandable in your context since there is so much liability, but for the most part, I would think that if everyone knew each other, there would be no need for such a rule.

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            • #21
              Originally posted by Rageaholic View Post
              I would still think it would be strange to have to show your ID even if everyone else had to. (I assume everyone else would have to show their ID). I've been to many houseparties and never had witnessed a rule in place (then again, I don't drink).

              As I said, I think it's understandable in your context since there is so much liability, but for the most part, I would think that if everyone knew each other, there would be no need for such a rule.
              I did clarify, even my husband was id'ed plus I tend to forget the age's of my family members, forget my friends hell I am lucky I remember my own age (everything else is fine just age's throw me, then again numbers aren't my thing)
              I'm a happy, well adjusted emotinally disturbed person, who can't spell

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              • #22
                I'm assuming you ID'ed your husband as a silly joke between the two of you? Because if you were serious... That's a bit weird, no?

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                • #23
                  Originally posted by Boozy View Post
                  I'm assuming you ID'ed your husband as a silly joke between the two of you? Because if you were serious... That's a bit weird, no?
                  wasn't a joke, this might shock everyone but I actually don't like giving people special treatment for rules like that, since if I did I would make bets that someone would gripe about it to no end

                  I don't see why so many people are making a fuss about the id thing here anyways I was asking about my reaction, not the rule itself
                  I'm a happy, well adjusted emotinally disturbed person, who can't spell

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                  • #24
                    Originally posted by Boozy View Post
                    I'm assuming you ID'ed your husband as a silly joke between the two of you? Because if you were serious... That's a bit weird, no?
                    Not in the eyes of the law. It tends to be a little unbending in such matters.

                    Over on CS we have people who do this for a living who check IDs on co-workers... You know, people who have to prove their age to be hired in the first place and whose ID is on file.

                    And, back on the actual topic, I don't think your reaction was any more out of line than anyone getting irritated over someone giving them a hard time for no good reason. Because when you boil it down, the friend was getting his jollies over making your life more difficult.

                    ^-.-^
                    Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

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                    • #25
                      And there was the carding of the twin sister post.

                      Granted we don't have this in place and our drinking age is 18, but at some gig's held in normal venue's that might have a younger following (last I recall was a mix bag of bands one was purely school age and the last my age(ish) ) those wishing to buy booze had to show ID or be like I am, old enough to not look like they are still at school, although I do shave off 20 years when I shave, I got asked for my DoB by a guy and that year I was there atleast twice a month for bands, but I digress.

                      Those that were over 18 got a wrist band and could buy beer, those without wrist bands, even if they were 80 could not, if your parties were required by law or just as an agreement between fellow hosts and party goers, to wear a wrist band to get served you could atleast spot those that are under the age or were being dicks about ID who are drinking, remind them that if they are under 21 and something happens and you get a fine, just ask them to stump up the cash instead.

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                      • #26
                        Originally posted by LadyMage View Post
                        I don't see why so many people are making a fuss about the id thing here anyways I was asking about my reaction, not the rule itself
                        I think the reason we're focussed on the ID thing is because some of us understand why that particular friend might have been inclined to poke a little fun. Especially if it was known that you had ID'ed your own husband. Perhaps you were being perceived as rather stern and he was simply trying to lighten the mood.

                        I'm not saying you were wrong to have that policy. I think you are a responsible host, and that's a good thing. But is a stupid joke worth getting upset about? His joke wasn't funny (from a pure comedy perspective), but nor was it offensive.

                        Originally posted by Andara Bledin View Post
                        Not in the eyes of the law. It tends to be a little unbending in such matters.


                        There's a law that requires someone to check the ID of their spouse before serving them a drink in their own home?

                        Because my husband brought me a glass of wine while I was in the bath last night. If he'd insisted on seeing my ID, I'd have called him a prick and refused to let him into bed that night.
                        Last edited by Boozy; 06-21-2011, 11:50 PM.

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                        • #27
                          Originally posted by Boozy View Post
                          I think the reason we're focussed on the ID thing is because some of us understand why that particular friend might have been inclined to poke a little fun. Especially if it was known that you had ID'ed your own husband. Perhaps you were being perceived as rather stern and he was simply trying to lighten the mood.

                          I'm not saying you were wrong to have that policy. I think you are a responsible host, and that's a good thing. But is a stupid joke worth getting upset about? His joke wasn't funny (from a pure comedy perspective), but nor was it offensive.





                          There's a law that requires someone to check the ID of their spouse before serving them a drink in their own home?



                          Because my husband brought me a glass of wine while I was in the bath last night. If he'd insisted on seeing my ID, I'd have called him a prick and refused to let him into bed that night.
                          two problems with this, 1. I don't think the law would care either way, I am considered the bartender in my home therefore libel if someone did something stupid

                          no the joke wasn't offensive, but at that point I was stressed, tired, running around dealing with things and trying to get an announcement about foodstuffs (aside from chips, and small hor derves and sweets) so I wasn't in a happy mood, if he had done this at the beginning of the party I wouldn't have been as annoyed, though I would have played keep away with the wristband for a while instead of just grumbling a bit. and if your husband has to id people for a party and you get mad cause he did his job and id'ed you, well and no at home with just me and him I wouldn't id him for a glass of wine, but you are making a false comparison here, this was a party with THIRTY or so people, not just me and my husband, if the gathering was smaller and I was sure everyone was at least drinking age I wouldn't have bothered, but this was a big party, with minors, some of which I barely knew and others that I wasn't sure were 18 or 21 (some of my friends I think are 21 are 18 and vise versa) so rather then single out a few people as 'yeah I know you' I treated everyone the same

                          I am sorry you think I was being too stern but my house my rules, and I try to be fair, and since the party went without a MAJOR hitch (just my minor gripe) I would say my rules weren't that stern after all

                          This was a policy everyone agreed with and giving special treatment is something I was taught NEVER to do, even to family rules are rules and no one is exempt

                          and the law doesn't require ID (it was a rule the hosts agreed to and one even INSISTED ON) but it does say that if a minor is drunk and I get caught with that without reporting the kid to parents or police I get fined as the homeowner, same if someone does something stupid, hell if they drove off drunk I would be held accountable too!
                          Last edited by LadyMage; 06-22-2011, 12:23 AM.
                          I'm a happy, well adjusted emotinally disturbed person, who can't spell

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                          • #28
                            Originally posted by Boozy View Post
                            I'm assuming you ID'ed your husband as a silly joke between the two of you? Because if you were serious... That's a bit weird, no?

                            When I was a bartender in an actual bar I had to ID my husband, the other bartender said he looked young and to card him before serving him, and in WI once ID is requested you cannot be served until it is produced, he handed me his ID and I handed it to the other bartender(she didn't believe he was my husband, or old enough)
                            Registered rider scenic shore 150 charity ride

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                            • #29
                              That's in a bar.

                              LadyMage's husband was ID'ed in his own home.

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                              • #30
                                Originally posted by Boozy View Post
                                That's in a bar.

                                LadyMage's husband was ID'ed in his own home.
                                again, final time, I do not give special treatment to family in a huge party of THIRTY people 30, as in a lot, as in I might as well ID people

                                it seems strange but its either that or risk a fine, and personally I would rather cover my own ass, oh and since I wasn't the only host (three people counting myself planned this party) this rule was INSISTED on, as in even if I was against it I couldn't do anything about it

                                WHY WHY!? why is this id thing the crux of the debate, that wasn't even what I was questioning *headdesks*
                                I'm a happy, well adjusted emotinally disturbed person, who can't spell

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