Joking around about serious rules to the rule maker

[AdminAssistant]

LadyMage, I'm sorry that you're feeling frustrated. Although the notion of ID'ing guests at a party seems odd to us, apparently it's common practice wherever you are.

Moving on, yeah, the dude was kind of a douche. He's probably also the guy that makes the, "It must be free!" joke when an item won't scan.

[LadyMage]

LadyMage, I'm sorry that you're feeling frustrated. Although the notion of ID'ing guests at a party seems odd to us, apparently it's common practice wherever you are.

Moving on, yeah, the dude was kind of a douche. He's probably also the guy that makes the, "It must be free!" joke when an item won't scan.

wouldn't know, I don't go shopping with him, though it wouldn't shock me

he meant well but augh, and I shouldn't be frustrated but this kind of hijacking happens to me in real life too (not even kidding I say one major thing and one minor point to explain it and the minor point is what people see *facepalms*) if I believed in such things I would say I am cursed

[Greenday]

It'd make sense to me to ID at the door if it's a huge party and it involves a lot of people you don't know. But for smaller parties, I don't believe in following senseless rules. Compliance with those rules indicates an agreement with those rules. I'd also be pretty miffed if my friends didn't know I was of drinking age. I don't care if they think I'm 21-30 but knowing whether or not I'm 21 or older should be easy enough to remember since I've drank with most of my friends.

Then again, I also have no problem with underage kids drinking under my supervision. I know how much they are drinking and I can cut them off whenever I want. I also never had to worry about my friends getting out of hand enough to the point where the cops would even take notice of our parties. And if the cops come and check IDs, just hide the couple kids that are underage. If the cops walk in, only find ten of us drinking, and every single one of us is 21 or older, they aren't going to waste their time raiding the place trying to find an underage kid.

[LadyMage]

It'd make sense to me to ID at the door if it's a huge party and it involves a lot of people you don't know. But for smaller parties, I don't believe in following senseless rules. Compliance with those rules indicates an agreement with those rules. I'd also be pretty miffed if my friends didn't know I was of drinking age. I don't care if they think I'm 21-30 but knowing whether or not I'm 21 or older should be easy enough to remember since I've drank with most of my friends.

Then again, I also have no problem with underage kids drinking under my supervision. I know how much they are drinking and I can cut them off whenever I want. I also never had to worry about my friends getting out of hand enough to the point where the cops would even take notice of our parties. And if the cops come and check IDs, just hide the couple kids that are underage. If the cops walk in, only find ten of us drinking, and every single one of us is 21 or older, they aren't going to waste their time raiding the place trying to find an underage kid.

see I don't like that, I think pulling that shit is WRONG for two reasons

1. you are breaking the law and hiding it which can get you in bigger trouble if caught (its happened at other parties I know about, cops aren't that dumb)
2. I have a strong respect for cops, noting some of my family are poilce, so to me this seems like saying 'cops are too dumb to check for more people'

sorry but that don't fly with me, at my house you get id'ed at big parties with booze end of story don't like it, don't come!

[Greenday]

1. you are breaking the law and hiding it which can get you in bigger trouble if caught (its happened at other parties I know about, cops aren't that dumb)
2. I have a strong respect for cops, noting some of my family are poilce, so to me this seems like saying 'cops are too dumb to check for more people'

1. We weren't hiding it, we just weren't being dumb about it thus we didn't get caught. And maybe the cops near you aren't dumb, but damnit, we had plenty of stupid ones around school and back home.

2. I have respect for cops. Ask anyone here and they'll tell you I nearly always side with the law/police. I just don't respect stupid laws or stupid cops. And it's not saying they are too dumb to check for more people, it's saying they are wasting their time on searching for underage drinkers when actual crimes are being committed in town likes rapes, muggings, assaults, etc. Cops have better shit to do then to bust in on a few kids kicking it back, having some drinks.

[LadyMage]

1. We weren't hiding it, we just weren't being dumb about it thus we didn't get caught. And maybe the cops near you aren't dumb, but damnit, we had plenty of stupid ones around school and back home.

2. I have respect for cops. Ask anyone here and they'll tell you I nearly always side with the law/police. I just don't respect stupid laws or stupid cops. And it's not saying they are too dumb to check for more people, it's saying they are wasting their time on searching for underage drinkers when actual crimes are being committed in town likes rapes, muggings, assaults, etc. Cops have better shit to do then to bust in on a few kids kicking it back, having some drinks.

honestly I wouldn't mind the drinking age being lowered to 18 (I mentioned this earlier btw) but hiding even minor crimes make it worse on you if you are caught you call it 'not being dumb' now try saying that to a judge

this has happened at other parties, it wasn't pretty

and stupid or not all it takes is one dumb partygoer to ruin it too, not one smart cop

[Andara Bledin]

I'd also be pretty miffed if my friends didn't know I was of drinking age. I don't care if they think I'm 21-30 but knowing whether or not I'm 21 or older should be easy enough to remember since I've drank with most of my friends.

That means nothing. My boyfriend was drinking with his friends at his college bar 2 years before he was legally old enough to drink. The fact that facial hair made him look to be in his mid-30's didn't hurt, I'm sure. The bartender looked pained when he went in on his actual 21st birthday and learned an important lesson to not trust anyone.

^-.-^

[telecom_goddess]

All in all I like the idea of id'ing the people coming...it really just ensures that everyone has their ID on them SHOULD the cops come calling. Better safe than sorry.

[insertNameHere]

Alright I get no special treatment for friends, little over the top to ID husband in his own home because honestly you should be able to tell anyone who doesn't like you making an exception for guy who lives there and pays the bills to go fuck themselves and not feel the least bit bad about it.

I had plenty of people buy for me that are underage, and well I don't know many responsible underage people I would risk me ass for to provide. In college town, everyone had signs posted at the party NO underage drinking just to appease the cops.

However, if part of the party has rules that your going to ID people especially considering the amount of people that will be there and it sounds like most of the people are young anyways not like a 50 something couple is being uptight. Whenever we have a party out at my house my mom IDs my friends because she doesn't want someone else to own her house because some underage idiot did something. I was greatly offended when my gf at the time had a friend who planned to use her sisters ID and got pissed when I told her no fucking way I know your too young, fine at the bars where it your ass and not mine.

[LadyMage]

Alright I get no special treatment for friends, little over the top to ID husband in his own home because honestly you should be able to tell anyone who doesn't like you making an exception for guy who lives there and pays the bills to go fuck themselves and not feel the least bit bad about it.

I had plenty of people buy for me that are underage, and well I don't know many responsible underage people I would risk me ass for to provide. In college town, everyone had signs posted at the party NO underage drinking just to appease the cops.

However, if part of the party has rules that your going to ID people especially considering the amount of people that will be there and it sounds like most of the people are young anyways not like a 50 something couple is being uptight. Whenever we have a party out at my house my mom IDs my friends because she doesn't want someone else to own her house because some underage idiot did something. I was greatly offended when my gf at the time had a friend who planned to use her sisters ID and got pissed when I told her no fucking way I know your too young, fine at the bars where it your ass and not mine.

If it makes EVERYONE feel better my husband was all for being id'ed ok... geez...

[the_std]

If it makes EVERYONE feel better my husband was all for being id'ed ok... geez...

LadyMage, I hope you know that no one is attacking you, just potentially disagreeing with the law and the situation that made you have to ID people, which is, I will also agree, very strange to most people. A lot of people aren't quite as strict about the law as it seems you may be, and while it's not a negative quality in you, I can understand why people might voice opinions of it being weird.

I wouldn't take it personally, as it seems you might be.

[Andara Bledin]

It's not so much the questioning of the law or her IDing people that's she's frustrated by; it's the fact that she posted about her friend being a jackass to her and her reaction and almost nobody has commented on anything but the information she provided so that the actual topic would have context.

^-.-^

[LadyMage]

It's not so much the questioning of the law or her IDing people that's she's frustrated by; it's the fact that she posted about her friend being a jackass to her and her reaction and almost nobody has commented on anything but the information she provided so that the actual topic would have context.

^-.-^

yeah, if I had worries about the id'ing thing, I would have just say 'is it ok to id your friends and family at a party due to a strict law' not give a long winded backstory of the situation then ask a question

though to be honest parties that don't id scare the hell out of me, since it seems like something would go wrong at any time, but then again that is just my opinion and I won't tell anyone to id at their parties if they don't want to, I just won't attend, its that simple

[aurelemsrealm]

If everyone has been told about the rules in advance, then there should have been no such issue. Everyone was warned what would be expected of them. I probably would not have gotten annoyed about your friend's joke necessarily, but I wouldn't have found it particularly funny, either. I'd have just flatly pointed out to him that either he has his ID on him and he can drink, or he doesn't and gets no alcohol. I like to joke around, be a smartass, and have fun with it as much as anyone, but I also tend to be no-nonsense when expectations have been made abundantly clear. Most of my reaction would depend on the friend's tone.

[wolfie]

So in order to keep things cool and keep from paying a fine me and the birthday boy set up these rules

1. show id at the door or no alcohol for you, wristbands will be given to drinkers NO EXCEPTIONS (even the birthday boy got his id checked I was that serious about it)
2. Either have a designated driver or leave your keys with me
3. Homeowner and fellow hosts (had more then one person helping because of the number of people, about thirty) reserve the right to cut you off
4. If you are drunk at the end of the night you will either be called a cab or you will stay the night here

seems fair right? I informed people of these rules more then once over the course of about three weeks leading up to the party and most of my friends followed the rules gladly and without fail and where quite happy with the idea until one friend came in.

Me: Ok gotta see your id
F: I don't have it
Me: then no drink
F: aw you know I am old enough
Me: sorry but that is the rule
F: but you know me
Me: ID or no drink
F: come on
Me: *getting annoyed* sorry that is the rule
F: aww I was kidding *finally hands me his id*
Me:

If this situation (large wet party) happens again, i'd suggest amending the rules:

1 1/2) You will be asked ONCE for ID. If you don't show it the first time you're asked, no wristband.

In the case that occurred, I'd be tempted (when jackass finally handed you his ID) to tell him "You said you didn't have your ID, so this must be an ID card you borrowed from someone else. Sorry, no wristband."