Victim Blaming

[guywithashovel]

I got to thinking about this.

People tend to get harsh with people who put blame on the victim when something offensive happens. Often, when the phrase "blame the victim" is said, people think of a rape victim getting blamed for her/his rape. However, I'm thinking about more than that.

Maybe someone in a relationship gets cheated on.

Maybe someone's friend does something to betray him.

Many other examples could be thought of as well.

Regardless of the situation, is it bad to suggest that maybe the victim got into the situation because of bad choices or whatever? Personally, I rarely ever do this. Whenever someone talks about someone being the victim of something, I'll listen without interjecting much critical opinion. But if I did offer suggestions that maybe the victim made choices that made them more likely to become a victim, would that be bad?

Let's say my neighbor gets his home burglarized when he's not home. However, when he left home that day, he not only left all the doors and windows unlocked, but the front door was left wide open. Sure, it sucks that someone stole his things and invaded his property, and the burglar is not excused in any way, but at the same time, if he had secured his home, this may not have happened.

That's just one example, of course. I'm sure other examples could be easily thought of.

[Andara Bledin]

The victim is never to blame for another person taking an action that harms them; that is entirely the fault of the perpetrator. They are fully culpable for their actions.

There are some cases, however, where the victim could have taken steps to help avoid becoming a victim or made poor choices that led to the perpetrator being able to victimize them.

But even if you leave your keys in your unlocked car in a bad neighborhood, that doesn't lessen the responsibility of a person who chooses to steal the car. Just because it's predictable does not excuse that it happens.

^-.-^

[DrFaroohk]

You could apply that anywhere. "If she hadn't been dressed so seductively and walked down that dark alley with that guy who promised her drugs...."

The only thing you can blame a victim for is when they do something completely stupid to themselves. Like falling asleep with a lit cigarette. Don't do that. No one else made you do it.

[guywithashovel]

There are some cases, however, where the victim could have taken steps to help avoid becoming a victim or made poor choices that led to the perpetrator being able to victimize them.

But even if you leave your keys in your unlocked car in a bad neighborhood, that doesn't lessen the responsibility of a person who chooses to steal the car. Just because it's predictable does not excuse that it happens.

^-.-^

This is pretty much what I was talking about. Of course, in such a situation, the victim likely will feel so bad about making those poor choices that pointing it would would be merely rubbing salt in wounds.

[bara]

The victim CANNOT be held accountable for the crimes committed by another.
The victim CAN be held accountable for stupid actions that may have helped perpetuated a crime.

In the case of rape, how one is dressed isn't a determining factor from statistics I've seen in the past. Seldom is rape done by some random person one meets in a club, its normally done by someone the victim knows, or is at the least acquainted with in some fashion.

Leaving your car running with the doors unlocked is stupid in the walmart parking lot. Leaving your house unlocked isn't terribly bright especially in a high crime area. Hell, my sister had loose change stolen out of her car when it was in her garage and all she did was forget to close the garage door and they are in a NICE area. She was out around $4.00 or so.

The victim is never at fault for the crime committed against them. But in some cases you may ridicule a victim for doing something stupid that made them a prime target. For the record, I do not believe this applies to rape because of the statistics. Rape is about power so is rarely done at random.

[Rageaholic]

I think it depends. In the burglar example, the neighbor was being a complete idiot. I mean, you'd have to try be that stupid. Burglar is still equally at fault, but when you fail that epically, you're putting a target on your head.

On the other hand, what if someone just forgot to lock the door one time? I mean it happens and I imagine everyone did something stupid one time or another. Should someone be judged for making a careless mistake? All because some jackass took advantage of when they had their guard down? That's a lot different from leaving all your windows and doors open and unlocked.

[BlaqueKatt]

The victim is never at fault for the crime committed against them. But in some cases you may ridicule a victim for doing something stupid that made them a prime target. For the record, I do not believe this applies to rape because of the statistics. Rape is about power so is rarely done at random.

I'm going to disagree for two reasons:

getting so stupid drunk one's situational awareness drops to nil, or not watching one's drink, both take zero responsibility off the rapist, however situational awareness is essential for safety.

We at one point had a serial rapist on campus, after the first two victims the university issued a warning to lock your doors. He got about 10 other victims before being caught. His M.O. was to wait until the girls had left for the night, sneak into the unlocked dorms and wait for the drunk students to come home. The victims believed that losing their keys of fumbling for them when drunk was more risky than leaving their doors unlocked. Every single one interviewed said the same thing, "I didn't think it would happen to me", so they took zero precautions to ensure their own safety.

[jackfaire]

getting so stupid drunk one's situational awareness drops to nil, or not watching one's drink, both take zero responsibility off the rapist, however situational awareness is essential for safety.

This I never get drunk in a bar. Ever. I have one to two drinks that's it. If i plan on getting drunk it's at the home of someone I trust where I know I won't be screwed with.

There is a level of stupidity that is almost criminally stupid. Like loudly talking about the thousand dollars you just won as you walk out of a place with it in your pocket.

[Gravekeeper]

I'm going to sub-divide this into carelessness and stupidity. Carelessness I would not make fun of someone for ( Forgetting to lock their car/house ). Stupidity on the other hand ( Leaving your car unlocked and running at Walmart ) sure ;P.

I would say the barometer is whether or not the situation makes you think:

"Oh, its unfortunate that happened" or "Well, what did you think would happen?"

Leaving a window open and getting robbed = "Oh, that's unfortunate"
Not bothering to lock your door/windows because hey you'll be back soon what are the odds? = "Well, what did you think would happen?"

[Boozy]

Not bothering to lock your door/windows because hey you'll be back soon what are the odds? = "Well, what did you think would happen?"

The thing is that, in most areas of North America, you can leave your house and even your car unlocked and 99.999 times out of 100, nothing will happen.

Which makes the answer to your question "What did you think would happen"? ...."Nothing". Because they've done it hundreds of times before and nothing ever did.

[Gravekeeper]

The thing is that, in most areas of North America, you can leave your house and even your car unlocked and 99.999 times out of 100, nothing will happen.

Sorry, but that doesn't negate common sense. Just because a scenario is unlikely doesn't mean you should willfully increase the chance of it. Lived in a small town like that through high school. Parents still live there. They never locked their house/car for years because hey, small town, everyone was friendly, low crime, etc.

Couple years ago they found a coked up transient living in their RV and he had been for months by crawling in at night after they went to bed and leaving before they got up.

They lock it all now. >.>

As for your car, it'd be gone in a matter of hours if you left it unlocked in half the Lower Mainland here <cough>

[AdminAssistant]

I lived in an area of Kansas City notorious for car break-ins. If you left something of value in your car, it would be gone, and you'd be replacing a window or two. One of my friends left his Sirius radio in his car because he was going inside for 'just a minute'. Yep. GONE.

I would actually be more apt to lock things up in my rural hometown than where I live now, because, well, meth. Those quaint country towns usually have groups of deadbeats that will prey on that sense of "That doesn't happen here" and steal anything that isn't bolted down so that they can either buy drugs or the materials to make drugs. They poisoned our dog with dog treats dipped in antifreeze so they could steal our generator.

[Andara Bledin]

I live in Compton, and before that in a rather ghetto apartment complex. I've left both my home and car unlocked many times (accidentally). Nobody has ever even tried to get into either. In fact, the only time anyone got into my stuff was the transient who was sleeping in my station wagon, and that started off locked, tho he didn't break anything to get in. *shrug*

^-.-^

[Seifer]

I've seen and heard people do some incredibly stupid things that could lead to them being a victim of a crime. Do I blame the victim? Well, sometimes, you can't help but put some of the responsibility on the victim.

An example of this would be:

In high school, one of the "popular" girls was chit chatting with her friends about a party she'd been to. Apparently she got totally 100% wasted drunk, and was completely out in the stratosphere. One of her male acquaintances was trying to get her to have sex, but (thankfully) her friends stepped in and put a stop to it.

Now, why am I using this story as an example? Because this girl thought the entire thing was one big joke. She was giggling and laughing about how SHE WAS ALMOST TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF BY A GUY AT A PARTY. Like it was no big deal.

That is stupidity at it's finest. You'd think she'd learn a fucking lesson or two and be happy she didn't get raped. Instead, she treats it like a joke. Real classy. I hope she's never put in that position again, because it might not turn out so positive.

The other examples of holding the victims partially responsible would be all those idiots on facebook who tell the world they'll be on vacation in Hawaii for 3 weeks and they don't have a security system.

[DrFaroohk]

But a person's lack of common sense does NOT give someone a right to do something bad to them. Doesn't matter how stupid you are - my right to not have my shit stolen trumps your right to take advantage of a stupid person.

Unless you're going to apply it across the board. Either the victim can take the blame (regardless of the crime) or not.