That's *Mrs.* AdminAssistant

[Ree]

Congratulations.
Wishing you many years of happiness.

[Nekojin]

The inflatable baseball bat would come in very handy.

Only if it's a matched set.

[kiwi]

Yay!!! Congratulations!

[Boozy]

How did the wedding go, really? Surely there are some good stories for us.

[AdminAssistant]

Well, *since* you asked...

Basically, my mother (who I love dearly) acted like a petulant child. My sister did me a favor and told her to be at the venue after we had left to get our hair done. Mom and I battle constantly about my appearance, especially hair and makeup, and I didn't want her there. Well, when we get back, Mom had just arrived and is pouting because she didn't get *her* hair done. Mom has very short hair, and I thought it looked nice. So I get the dress on and I need our day-of coordinator to help put on the veil so we can do the First Look pictures. But she's too busy fixing my mother's hair, curling it into some Bride-of-Frankenstein style monstrosity. Finally managed to pull her away for a second to finish getting me ready (y'know, the bride, one of the two most important people that day). Come back to see Mom...she's very happy, so I tell her how nice she looks, even though I hate it. She's overly made up and just doesn't look like herself. But in her view, that's how one looks their best, by overdoing it. (I also think she was trying to out-do Hubby's Mom, who looked very nice in a sundress and simple hairstyle.)

She harassed my photographer, who drove down from Wisconsin to shoot my wedding for free, about getting all of the pictures she wanted. I tried to explain that a picture with her and her sisters could be done after the ceremony, but noooooo. Now, I will say that her and Dad kept their promises to be on their best behavior. There were apparently some words and looks between my Dad's 'friend' and Mom's sisters, but I didn't learn about that until a few days later.

Oh, nearly forgot, I told people that I did not want to save the top tier of the wedding cake to freeze and eat a year later. It's wasteful and gross...I'd rather just order a new cake next year. So, when Hubby's Mom was helping to pack up the food, she put the top of the cake in the box of things to go to our loft. Mom saw it and took it away. MIL put it back. This went back and forth for a while, with MIL trying to respect our wishes and Mom pulling the 'Well, it doesn't matter what she wants, I'm freezing this and that's just how it is.' Yeah. She called me a few days later and triumphantly announced that our cake top was in her freezer. I replied, "Great, well, we can thaw that out in a year, take a bite, then throw it away," She said, "Well, that's fine, but you're going to have it next year."

What else....oh, small thing. We have an old family friend who is a Justice of the Peace. I felt pretty strongly about having a civil ceremony, since this is first and foremost a legal act and religion shouldn't have any role in that. Since said family friend is a deacon in the church I grew up in, I thought that it might help the civil ceremony go down sweeter with our more conservative family members. I also had him read the bit from Corinthians ("Love is patient, love is kind..") because it's actually a nice passage and we wanted to include something traditional. Well...he went...off script. He added in a LOT of stuff about serving the Lord, walking our path with the Lord, and even added a prayer at the end. It mostly amused me...here an agnostic and a Buddhist are being exhorted to serve the Christian God! He steered clear of the whole, "marriage is between a man and a woman" nonsense, so it was okay.

Oh, and the music. Hubby loves music, so I let him pick all of it out. Some of you electronica and geeky types might appreciate our processional and our recessional.

ETA: Oh, and Hubby's groom's cake. It was a marble cake,

[Lachrymose]

I have never heard of a groom's cake before (just looked it up), but that is awesome.

[HYHYBT]

Congratulations! (not very original, but still.)

I've once read that the secret to a long, happy marriage is to ensure that you don't both lose your temper simultaneously.

And how, exactly, do you ensure that?

[Nekojin]

I love the Groom's Cake. And I think that the nonsense about freezing the top of the bride's cake is , and the part about Mom deciding that it was getting frozen and saved for next year against the wishes of the bride is just simply outrageous.

If the bride wants to stand on tradition, stand on tradition. If the bride wants to chuck tradition, nobody else has any right to demand that tradition be upheld. It's their (bride and groom's) day, everyone else's demands are secondary.

Edit: Congratulations, by the way!

[Hyena Dandy]

Wouldn't being Mrs. Admin Assistant mean you married YOURSELF?!

:O THE CONSERVATIVES WERE RIGHT. GAY MARRIAGE CAUSES INSANITY.

Nah, just kidding. Congrats, really... I'm thrilled.

[tropicsgoddess]

I love the Groom's Cake. And I think that the nonsense about freezing the top of the bride's cake is , and the part about Mom deciding that it was getting frozen and saved for next year against the wishes of the bride is just simply outrageous.

If the bride wants to stand on tradition, stand on tradition. If the bride wants to chuck tradition, nobody else has any right to demand that tradition be upheld. It's their (bride and groom's) day, everyone else's demands are secondary.

Edit: Congratulations, by the way!

To be honest, I never really understood why anybody would want to eat 1 year old frozen cake for the sake of tradition to be honest.

Nekojin, you are so right about that! The bride and groom's wishes are first and should be final.


Again, congrats to you and your hubby, AA! I wish you all the joy and happiness in the years to come for your marriage!

[Silverharp]

Hooray! A pint to you and Mister Admin Assistant!

[blas87]

I didn't know people still even did that tradition of saving cake!

Oh, Admin, I know exactly what you mean about parents still trying to "force" stuff on you. Your ma telling you you're "going to have the cake" reminds me of trying to tell my parents that no, I didn't want or need something, and they will force me to take it, and I mean, mom will just keep raising her voice Or. Talking. Like. This. until she gets her way.....

[HYHYBT]

Saving the cake is silly (for one thing, even if it did keep well, the box takes up too much of a freezer) but it's a far better tradition than smushing the cake into your spouse's face.

[blas87]

I couldn't agree more with you on that!

I don't think it's appropriate for either, but especially for the bride because all it takes is a clumsy hand and a few crumbs on that white dress, and oh dear, that beautiful makeup is ruined.

Sure, I'm more vain that what's humanly appropriate, but if anyone ever dared did that to me, that'd be the quickest transition from dearly beloved to dearly departed.

[AdminAssistant]

There was no cake smushing, but there was frosting on our hands after and I swiped a little on his nose and he got a little on my arm and cheek. It wiped off easily. It may have messed up my makeup a little, but I did my makeup myself and the reception was already winding down by that point.