Vanilla Sex (NSFW)

[Nyoibo]

The lights can't be on and it is required to feel guilty afterwords.

Isn't that Catholic sex?

[Kara_CS]

In my local kink group, we use vanilla to refer to anyone or anything not related to "the lifestyle." It was explained to me that vanilla sex is pretty much just plain ol' boring missionary sex (yes, I was so uninitiated when I joined the group that I had to ask my SO what "vanilla" meant).

[Medea]

From this discussion, I'm going to say my sex life is something more like raspberry ripple: mostly vanilla, but a few swirls of something 'extra'. (TMI: simple toys and light spanking on occasion)

[fireheart17]

I've always known it as basically just sex, basic positions, missionary, maybe a little adventurous with cowgirl or doggy, no oral, no anal, just straight up sex.

... Wait, I have a vanilla sex life

If it makes you feel any better, so do I.

To be honest, the term "vanilla sex" didn't pop up until I read Fifty Shades of Grey. (yes, I read them )

[Nyoibo]

If it makes you feel any better, so do I.

To be honest, the term "vanilla sex" didn't pop up until I read Fifty Shades of Grey. (yes, I read them )

I'm guessing a bit less vanilla than mine.

[HYHYBT]

I should add some vanilla to spice mine up.

[fireheart17]

I'm guessing a bit less vanilla than mine.

Is that referring to my sex life or Fifty Shades?

[Skunkle]

I suspect the term "vanilla" is sort of the opposite of the term "normal." Despite both having similar connotations.

What I mean by that is: "Normal" is subjective, and is usually applied to the speaker; people usually call themselves normal as a way of designating others as not normal.
Ex: I'm normal, you're not.

"Vanilla" is also subjective, but it is often used to describe others. Some comments here notwithstanding, the term is often used to describe other peoples' sex lives versus the speaker's exciting, kinky one.
Ex: You're vanilla, I'm kinky.

I would opine that a fair generalized description of 'vanilla' is: ordinary; boring; lacking whatever kind(s) of spice or fire the speaker either has or wishes he had. Maybe like that threesome with two bi girls which seems to be the most common straight guy fantasy.

[Tanasi]

Isn't that Catholic sex?

I guess, my wife is Catholic but I'm not, I used to tell her on Saturday evening to go get ready for bed as I was going to give her something to go confess about.

[Nyoibo]

Is that referring to my sex life or Fifty Shades?

Yours. *sigh*

[Hyena Dandy]

... Wait, I have a vanilla sex life

The only reason that would be a problem is if you want to have more kinky stuff in your sex life.

I've certainly never used vanilla to describe someone else as an insult. My best friend's sexual fantasies I'd describe as vanilla, but I don't mean that his life is boring or bad.

My sex life is literally just cybersex. I don't have a sex life. But I don't mean to insult people by calling their sex vanilla. To me it's simply a descriptor, a way to say "Not-fetish" in a way that, I thought, at least, was less insulting than "Not kinky."

[Kheldarson]

Isn't that Catholic sex?

No, no, that's Puritan sex.

Catholic sex is being able to focus all of that institutionalized guilt and repression into a loving, stable marriage

It generally results in a lot of kids though...

[fireheart17]

Yours. *sigh*

So that's who's been peeping into the window at night...