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Things I wish I had known about University/College

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  • Things I wish I had known about University/College

    we've got the textbook thread going but I figured we could use a more general thread.

    1. Textbook prices are designed to utterly screw you over, always shop around.

    2. University websites are purposefully confusing and hide the information you need.

    3. When someone tells you "all you have to do is..." there is always something they aren't mentioning.

    4. Unlike any other business in the world you are responsible to know how much you owe and do all the math yourself.

    5. there is always at least one area where people will leave free stuff.

  • #2
    6. Don't be tempted by that 7-8am class. You might think you're a morning person, but by mid-semester, you'll be so groggy getting up, you'll either never go to that class or you'll be asleep through most of its lectures.

    7. Don't be fooled by the "awesome" professor that never has quizzes, always lets the class out early, and makes jokes. Sometimes they surprise you with the midterm/final exam from hell.

    8. If you have a class in a building greater than 5 floors, never, never use the elevators. They're often slow, overcrowded, and scary. Plus, teachers will never accept your story for being late to class.

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    • #3
      9. There will always be that one jackass professor. Do what you can to find out who it is and avoid them or be prepared to just smile and nod the whole semester.
      I has a blog!

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      • #4
        10. There are only five types of professors:

        Crotchety Old Tenured Professor: The only reason they're still teaching is to maximize their pension benefits. They are really sick of their job and have used the same exact syllabus since 1995. Right now, they're just going through the motions. Their monotonous voice, unforgiving attitude toward tardiness, and lack of any kind of grading curve for the insanely difficult exam is in their M.O. When you protest a question on a test saying it was never covered in class, these professors will coldly retort, "You mean you didn't read that footnote in the textbook on page 457? That's your problem, not mine."

        Always remember to bring a Number 2 pencil. IT is waiting feverishly for these professors to retire so they can finally bring that room-sized exam computer from 1955 out of commission and replace it with a pool and ping pong table in their work space.

        Life-loving Professor: Unlike the crotchety old tenured professor, they love their job, but you don't even know how they DO their job. How do they keep that tan throughout the winter semester without going down south every weekend? Half of the class is spent with them going off into wild tangents about their crazy lives bungie jumping in the Alps, scuba diving in the Great Barrier Reef, and walking the entire length of the Great Wall of China... and that was just during this past summer. You will likely learn nothing about the actual subject they're supposed to teach, but you will sure get a lot of ideas if you ever travel the world in your lifetime.

        Their exams are almost always multiple choice, or true/false.

        MIA Professor: Don't get these professors confused: They do show up... but only 25 minutes into class when everyone's given up waiting for them and have since left the room. These professors will email a take-home exam at the end of the semester, often asking questions right out of the textbook.

        Mobius Curve Professor: The exams are maddeningly difficult. Sometimes even flawed with questions that don't make sense, have more than one possible correct answer depending on how you interpret the question or answer, or require using TI-89 to its full potential. These professors will respond not with altering the lecture, or making the exam a little more easy, but rather will simply apply the most bizarre curve to make it look like you actually learned something in the class. You will never know the quadratic formula used to calculate this curve, however. All you'll know is, despite getting 95% of the questions wrong, you still managed to earn an A-.

        Carpal Tunnel Syndrome Loving Sadist: These professors require you bring three pencils and two sharpeners to each exam. When you show up for these exams, the professor will have a three-foot tower of blue notebooks on the desk. Why? Because you're going to spend the entire 90 minute session writing a 2000-word essay. There are no bathroom breaks allowed, and no excuses regarding broken pencils will be accepted. After all, there's a reason they asked you to bring all these pencils and sharpeners.

        You have suspicions about the professor's grading methodology because you are convinced they can't possibly read all of these essays in the week it takes to grade them, especially if they're full-time and have 8 other classes, each with their own essay exams. Surely they're employing apathetic interns to read and grade the papers for them, which leaves a sour taste in your mouth.
        Last edited by TheHuckster; 09-05-2014, 04:10 PM.

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        • #5
          11. Never take a class where the professor for the class wrote the Book. Like most professors, they expect their students know the book as well as they do, but since the prof literately wrote the book, you become responsible to knowing 100% of book, and thus are graded harder.

          12. No matter how much you bust your ass for the class, or what the class is on, if you politically disagree with some professors your grade is screwed.

          13. Broken body parts are no excuse for late assignments.

          14. If you find yourself with a schedule that causes you to have to make it from one class to another in less then 10 minutes, across campus, you will find that neither professor will have any tolerance for people leaving earlier, or showing up late.
          ā€œThe problem with socialism is that you eventually,
          run out of other peopleā€™s money.ā€ ā€“ Margaret Thatcher

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          • #6
            15. Heart attacks and Strokes are also not excuses for not getting work in on time.

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            • #7
              16. If a commuter student, the parking lots will be slowly but steadily removed further and further away from the classroom buildings in order to accommodate resident/professor/staff parking near the their respective buildings. OR the commuter lots will become brand new buildings that'll you never use as they won't be done by the time you graduate.

              Either way expect to be walking for a long, long, long time as the bus never arrives on schedule...

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              • #8
                17. As a commuter student, classes will only be cancelled after you arrive in class from heinous 2 hour drive in blinding snow storm. And the two mile uphill trudge from the hinterlands (aka commuter parking).

                Never before.

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                • #9
                  18. It doesn't matter that over 60% of the student body commute and the weather service is telling everyone to stay off the roads except for medical emergencies—if the professor can make it to campus, so can you!

                  Also he lives across the street.

                  (Fun fact: Not a word of that is exaggerated.)
                  "The hero is the person who can act mindfully, out of conscience, when others are all conforming, or who can take the moral high road when others are standing by silently, allowing evil deeds to go unchallenged." ā€” Philip Zimbardo
                  TUA Games & Fiction // Ponies

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                  • #10
                    Just because the teacher says a work is optional, does not mean it isnĀ“t mandatory. Having evidence/witness that he said so can be what saves you from failing.

                    the greatest thing about doing a logic/algorithms course is that when the teacher tells you your answer is wrong because it differs from the one he expected, you can just run code to prove it works.
                    Last edited by SkullKing; 09-06-2014, 02:32 AM.

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                    • #11
                      19. Aside from costing hundreds of dollars (see rule 1), you can guarantee that one textbook you need won't be in stock and you'll have to wait until a week into your semester to retrieve it.

                      20. Lines at college bookstores are extremely long, even when there's only 5 people in 2 different lines.

                      21. The professors who pride themselves in never giving extra credit will break one day and give extra credit (typically in the form of a bonus question on a test).

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                      • #12
                        Working full time while being a full time student only looks easy.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by bainsidhe View Post
                          Working full time while being a full time student only looks easy.
                          YUP I can agree with that.

                          did 18 credit hours AND a 40+ hour a week assistant manager job at a fast food place and did the 45 minute one way commute for school for 3 semesters.

                          The last 2 semesters I did a 10 hour a week TA job and 18 credit hours.
                          I'm lost without a paddle and I'm headed up sh*t creek.

                          I got one foot on a banana peel and the other in the Twilight Zone.
                          The Fools - Life Sucks Then You Die

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                          • #14
                            22) people will automatically assume you live off campus when you become a junior.

                            I live on the campus every year I went to school and it shocked people when I told them that I lived on campus. It was easier for me to do it this way then to live off campus and try to get out of a lease at the end of the year.
                            "Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe" -H. G. Wells

                            "Nature, to be commanded, must be obeyed" -Sir Francis Bacon

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                            • #15
                              23) People assume your lazy when between school, homework and part time jobs you're probably working 40+ hours a week.

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