Religion Comes Knocking

[Saydrah]

At least once a week, in the summer!

I live right by a headquarters for LDS missionary services, and I think they start new missionaries out for training in my neighborhood. I get lots of door to door salvation salesmen- at least one set a week in the summer. Sometimes Jehovah's Witnesses also drop by. We've even had a set of nuns- not sure what was up with that, though.

When I was an annoying teenager, I played pranks on door to door missionaries. I was so sure that as an areligious (not atheist, but don't believe in religion) person I was superior to someone who dared go 'round preaching at me, and that they would probably just enjoy having a good story to tell, anyway! Now that I've had a job that requires going door to door, I treat folks who drop by with a little more humanity, and it really gets me down when I see others being rude to the missionaries who drop by. I've never had a missionary tell me anything but, "Can I leave this literature with you?" or "Thanks anyway," when I've explained that I'm not interested, period. They're much nicer than the newspaper salesmen who come around- though the last one of those got a sale out of me for giving the rat on my shoulder a kiss. It's nice when people don't gross out when they see my ratties.

I've actually gotten into the habit of keeping Vitamin Water and Clif bars around for the Mormons during "the season." It gets hot and thirsty going door to door, and since most are new to it, they might not yet have gotten into the habit of bringing snacks and hydration along. I started out offering tea, but quickly realized tea is not allowed! They're quite good company if they accept my invitation to step in for a snack (there are always cookies and milk in the house, too) and appreciate the change from slammed doors, even though I make it quite clear that all the tricks in the book have been used to try converting me and I remain unabashedly opposed to all organized religion. I've had some very nice, totally non-religious conversations.

So how do you react when religion comes knocking?

[Seshat]

It depends - mostly on their behaviour, also on my condition.

If getting up to answer the door is painful and difficult, and they'd been knocking repeatedly and insistently, they'll get a blunt 'go away' and a closed door. (If I'm in that much pain, I just don't answer the door unless the knocker keeps knocking and doesn't seem to want to go away.)

So, presuming I'm not in major pain, my behaviour depends on theirs.

- I HATE it when they don't want to say straight out what they're doing. Religion, door to door sales, anything - if they lead me on, and try to play that they're not actually preaching/selling at me, they can expect me to get blunt with them. I'll interrupt and ask them to cut to the chase, and if they refuse, I'll just say something like 'if you can't even tell me why you're here, it can't be that important. Goodbye.' Closed door.

- If they're rude about it, pushy and demanding, I'll again give them a blunt sort of 'go away'. No, I don't want to discuss the state of my soul with a rude stranger.

- If they're nice and polite, however, then I'll either politely tell them I don't have time, or I'll discuss comparative religion with them. Sometimes it leads to a pleasant, open discussion, where different religions are compared: this is when they're surprisingly open-minded for a religion hawker. Sometimes it scares them off. For some of them, it opens their mind to a new way of looking at things.




My own personal beliefs hold that this sort of preaching is extremely rude. In this society, everyone has heard of Christ - it's extremely hard to avoid hearing of Christ. Therefore, I - or anyone else - either already know a great deal about Christianity, or am capable of going to a library or church and finding out.

Yes, the early disciples were expected to spread the word. But there are two vast differences between them and modern Christians: there was no mass media in 40 AD, and there were very few Christians in 40 AD. Nowadays, you can't get away from the 'Jesus loves you' message.

If these 'missionaries' were coming around to check whether I'm disadvantaged or in need - that would be a completely different matter. I just might be a lonely, housebound widow who is being neglected by her family and could use a hand and someone to have a cup of tea with. Or a single mother, or - well, any of a number of disadvantages. And yes, as part of helping, they can go ahead and mention that they're doing this because it's part of their faith, and check whether their client interested in the faith. That's fine.

But coming specifically to convert people? Bah. Two assumptions there: that the person is not already Christian, and that the person is not capable of deciding for themselves. Incredibly rude, to my way of thinking.

So it really doesn't bother me to be blunt to the ones who pile rudeness on top of an already discourteous activity.

[Greenday]

I've never actually had someone come knocking on my door about religion. Hasn't happened at home, and no one would be allowed to come into the dorms to do that. They have, however, stood outside the dorm, and asked people if they'd take a quick survey. And then after you finish, presuming you actually did it, they'll give you a little spiel about the statistics of the surveys and their religion if you want to hear it. Most of the time they have been very accepting of my personal beliefs and haven't been pushy. Maybe once or twice they've gotten me agitated as I was in a hurry, but I'd just say sorry and continue on to wherever I was going.

[Saydrah]

The ones at my college campus do annoy me- it's usually "Campus Crusade for Christ," and they're ON college property using college resources (tables and chairs) to recruit for their organization. I don't think religious groups should be allowed to use things the school paid for.

[blas87]

Anywhere around here is fair game for the crusaders. I want so desperately to ask the landlord to make the properties "no soliciting" (btw, it's not just religious crusaders, there are also college kids trying to scam people and people selling stuff for their kids' schools). Some of us just don't have the money (or the time, or the desire besides!) for that kind of stuff. I don't want to listen to anyone preach at me.

[Saydrah]

When I'm feeling antisocial, a rat on each shoulder does wonders for getting rid of the riff-raff when answering the door. Especially my hairless rats.

[AFPheonix]

I've only gotten a few JWs coming around now and again. I'm so rarely at home it's not a big deal. If they look Jesus-y when I look through the peephole, I don't answer the door. If they manage to fool me anyways, I'm polite but firmly discouraging.
I am half tempted to answer the door topless sometimes, just for giggles though.

Speaking of giggles, the first thing that popped into my head when I saw the thread title was this guy:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sV-a1vmZ6y8

[Seshat]

I once either shocked a bunch of JWs, or cracked their minds open a little. I still don't know which.

They came to the door, and asked their classic 'what do you think is wrong with the world today' opener. The one that they try to answer with their spiel on worshipping their vision of God.

I said 'overpopulation', and backed it up. Poverty, war, famine: all resource shortages. Crowding out other species is also overpopulation. A great deal of social stress in any society is caused by resource distribution or resource shortage, so it wasn't hard to back that up.

They couldn't find a flaw in my argument, so they tried to say 'God will fix it'.

I pointed out that God had two ways of fixing it: killing already living people, or having fewer people born.

They didn't like that.

I pointed out that contraception is much gentler than epidemic, famine or war. I pointed out that it had been shown in third world countries that female education and opportunity, combined with availability of contraception, slowed the birth rate.

They started to argue - again - that God would fix it.

I quoted the 'The Lord helps those that help themselves' line. I pointed out that we had the ability to solve it ourselves. I suggested that God had made it possible for us to solve our problems ourselves, and pointed out that Lord sometimes works through us.

They had no response.

Then just to ice the cake, I mentioned that my own family was reducing population, across generations. Of six grandparents: mine and my brother's, my husband's, and my sister-in-law's, there are two grandchildren.

They looked quite uncomfortable at that point.

So I took pity on them and said I had to go.

The best part of it is that I do believe in every word I said. Oh, overpopulation isn't the only cause of our problems, but it's certainly a major one.

Did I mention that they had a kid there, listening to every word? I'm so evil!

[Rapscallion]

I once got some JWs to admit in front of their daughter (she was four-years-old or so) that if her life depended on a blood transfusion that they'd let her die.

I've not had to deal with any door-to-door proselytisers (spelling? don't care right now) for some time. Mind you, I'm pretty much always at work if there's overtime available.

Rapscallion

[Seshat]

I once got some JWs to admit in front of their daughter (she was four-years-old or so) that if her life depended on a blood transfusion that they'd let her die.

Ooooh, Raps! I like that.

Oddly, I haven't had the JWs at my door since my overpopulation spiel.

[Norton]

As a former Jehovah's Witness, I can give you some insight to the other side of the story. Note that I say former JW. I was raised that way, but have since come to term with my own beliefs.


Saydrah: It's very nice of you to be hospitable to missionaries. Even if you aren't swayed by their message, I'm sure they appreciate your attitude and kindness. We used to go door-to-door in all kinds of weather, sometimes for hours on end. It was always nice when a householder offered us a drink, or just a chance to get out of the weather while we spoke.

this sort of preaching is extremely rude. In this society, everyone has heard of Christ - it's extremely hard to avoid hearing of Christ. Therefore, I - or anyone else - either already know a great deal about Christianity, or am capable of going to a library or church and finding out.

Ah, but there are different kinds of Christianity. JWs are different from Catholics, Protestants, and Baptists. They believe their specific religion is the only salvation. They honestly want to give people a chance to survive the coming Armageddon. Also, they believe they have to preach in order for Armageddon to come. Jehovah will not move forward with it until everyone alive has been given a chance to worship him.

I want so desperately to ask the landlord to make the properties "no soliciting"

That won't help in the case of JWs. They give free literature, so they're not technically soliciting. They are encouraged by the higher-ups to ask for donations, but they rarely do, from what I've seen. Maybe they're more insistant about donations in some parts of the country, though.

I am half tempted to answer the door topless sometimes, just for giggles though.

JWs visit many many houses every year. That probably wouldn't be the first time they've seen someone under-dressed. In fact, they'll probably be relieved that you didn't answer the door brandishing a weapon, or threatening to sic a dog on them like some people have done. I've had all the above happen to me in my 10+ years as a JW.

Seshat: The whole "waiting for God to fix everything" mantra is one of the reasons I'm no longer a JW. I believe we should make the best of the world we have right now, instead of waiting for God to fix things for us. Oh, and I happen to agree with your views on overpopulation.

I once got some JWs to admit in front of their daughter (she was four-years-old or so) that if her life depended on a blood transfusion that they'd let her die.

Yes, it's very sad. Because of a few lines in an ancient book, JWs deny themselves and their families a possibly life-saving procedure. Thankfully for them, there are often alternatives to blood tranfusions available. Not always, though...
The fact that they admitted this in front of their daughter is no suprise to me. I had a Medical Directive Card (also known as a Blood Card) for as long as I could remember. The card stated that no blood was to be given to me under any circumstance. Every year when they were renewed, a sermon would be given about why JWs abstain from blood. My mother would also explain to me how if I were ever in a hospital and she wasn't there, to make sure that doctors gave me no blood. She said I could kick and scream and pull the I.V. out of my arm if necessary. JWs are told this from very early on. Often even as children, their beliefs are so strong that they'll die for them - but of course anyone who dies before Armageddon gets to be resurrected in a new perfect body after all the wicked has been wiped out.

Once again, their belief of "God will fix everything" prevails.

And I couldn't disagree more.

[Saydrah]

I have to admit I'm not near as fond of JW's as of Mormons; I just don't think it's right to have children that young going door to door. Having been a canvasser (door to door trying to get people to help the environment) myself and a lifelong political junkie who actually enjoys precinct walking, I've seen some real crazies who answer the door with weapons and the like- I'd never bring a child along, especially for religious purposes. I think the Mormons have the right idea (though the sexism I could do without)- if you MUST put someone in danger, make it young adults who are capable of running fast if necessary!

[AFPheonix]

We've had Mormons bring babies along, too, so they're not entirely without guilt in that regard.
These were usually really young couples who hadn't figured out the whole baby thing yet, though. The last time it was very cold out and they hadn't dressed the baby appropriately, much less themselves so Mom let them in to warm up and evangelized them right back.

[Seshat]

They believe their specific religion is the only salvation. They honestly want to give people a chance to survive the coming Armageddon. Also, they believe they have to preach in order for Armageddon to come. Jehovah will not move forward with it until everyone alive has been given a chance to worship him.

If there's anyone in the Western world who hasn't heard of JWs and had a copy of their Watchtower(?) shoved into their hands, I envy them. And they probably live on a Station in Outback Australia, or in the middle of the Canadian tundra.

My argument stands - and the JWs don't care, I'm sure.

Seshat: The whole "waiting for God to fix everything" mantra is one of the reasons I'm no longer a JW. I believe we should make the best of the world we have right now, instead of waiting for God to fix things for us. Oh, and I happen to agree with your views on overpopulation.
<snip>
Once again, their belief of "God will fix everything" prevails.

And I couldn't disagree more.

I think waiting for God to fix everything is lazy! Like a child who makes a mess they're perfectly capable of cleaning up, and waiting for Mummy to fix it.

I like to think I'm adult. I'm pleased you agree.

[Sylvia727]

My mom invites “Jesus salesmen” to convert to her religion. “Why, no thank you, I’m quite happy with my church. We’re down at the corner of Blank and Blah, you’re welcome to join us at any time.” Said with a smile, it’s usually the fastest and politest way of getting rid of them. If they show any interest, she tells them all about her congregation and her dogma.

My grandma changed churches once, not based on pushy conversions, but genuine caring. When she broke her hip and was laid up in the hospital for two weeks, the pastor of her 30-year parish didn’t visit or call her at all, but the pastor of the campus chapel visited her twice. The second time, he brought a magazine and a candy bar. When she recovered, she changed churches and denominations to the local chapel, because their pastor followed the eight beatitudes (“Visit the sick, feed the hungry, clothe the naked…”).

I think if more denominations and more religions worked together we would all be much happier. I was eating in a café last month, and in the booth next to mine were three gentlemen discussing their missionary work. Apparently their church was getting together with other denominations to “get young people fired up about Christ”. They honestly didn’t care which congregation the youngsters chose to attend, they just wanted to inspire them. It made me feel warm and fuzzy, even if I won’t be getting fired up.