May 21, 2011 is ...

[ZedOmega]

Not like you'd know it if he did anyway. I mean a brown liberal activist hippy? He'd be run out of town in a matter of hours down in any Christian Nation(tm) area. >.>

You think that's bad? Think about this for a second: Jesus tore a market apart because it was based in a temple. Vatican City has a gift shop. It'd be one hell of a news report...

Honestly, I don't buy into any of this doomsday stuff anyway. People have been saying that the world will end for centuries now and humans are still around, so why should I worry about it?

[Ipecac Drano]

Maybe another religion will arise if this rapture doesn't happen. The Seventh-day Adventists got their start as the result of such a failed prediction.

[blas87]

How do you know Jesus would return as a "brown" hippy, or that it would offend Christians in general if he did return that way?

[Talon]

How do you know Jesus would return as a "brown" hippy?

Because Bethlehem is located closer to North Africa than Greece. The supposed Jesus of Nazreth was also an advocate for the poor, which would make him a "hippy". Though not in the eyes of the majority of christians, just the ones with the mega-churches and mega-mouthpieces.

...or that it would offend Christians in general if he did return that way?

Again only the ones with the obnoxious loud mouths would be offended.

[Hyena Dandy]

I'm curious as to whether or not He's supposed to return in the same appearance as original. I've always sort of felt (Without any input from an outside source) that He would appear (and speak) however the person talking to Him expects.

I do still expect Him to be fairly in favor of helping the poor, regardless of age, sex, preference, race, or even religion. That was sort of His schtick. Compassion and forgiveness. And anyone who disagrees probably hasn't payed much attention to His teachings.

[wraiths_crono]

This is mostly satire, but I did hear my radio station talking about this report, in honor of this they are going to hold a "hand on the car" contest with 3 people of religions that will be saved, and 1 Pagan.. just to see.

[Hyena Dandy]

Although the issue of the Vatican City having a gift shop was raised, it struck me (although I may be wrong) that the story was that Jesus didn't want you moneychanging in the temple. But (although I could be wrong) I was under the impression the Vatican is a special administrative district within Rome, not one full cathedral.

[Skunkle]

Hyena, I like your idea - but I also kind of wonder if He would appear as something not only underwhelming, but something the average modern rich Christian would scoff at. Something like the "brown hippy" mentioned above. Chances are high that Jesus had at least an Arabic look if not darker skin and probably darker hair, and yet most illustrations we see show him as having light brown hair and being very caucasian - I think these are mostly European depictions that give him a European look to make him seem "familiar" i.e. "like us" ("us" being European people), but I'm not certain. Incidentally, Hyena, one furry comic strip, Kevin and Kell (used to be funny but kind of turned into nonstop computer jokes) did a little "birth of Jesus" storyline, and had Jesus depicted as the same species as whoever is observing Him. I like that idea, since we're supposedly created in God's image and all have the same facial layout, yet details are all extremely different and individual; the question of course being, "Okay, we look like God, so which one of us does God look like?" Not that God MUST have a physical form - I definitely don't imagine Him as a white guy with a beard - but Jesus had a physical form, and could again, and God likely could hold a visible form of some sort.

My only (minor) fear is that eventually, someone(s) is going to decide quite firmly that <date> is the second coming, the "end of the world". So what? Happened before. My fear is that they'll (1) decide that they are God's chosen catalyst, and that they themselves must bring about this end, and (2) said person just happens to have a proverbial 'finger on the button'. Cue guy blowing up some or other country(s) because they believe the Big Ending HAS to happen, and won't unless they the chosen make darned sure it happens on the 'right' date.

Anyone know the details on the "Mayan calendar ends in 2012" thing? Another person I spoke with claimed that not only does it not END, it simply starts over again - but that, further, the Mayan calendar has started over from 1 at another point in the world's history. Any knowledge on this, anyone?

I always figured the true coming would either be very sudden with the sky turning red and thundering and the earth shaking, or (also suddenly) by a man appearing on the news, claiming to be the Son of God, and doing honest-to-God miracles that are soon found to be unable to be debunked by the skeptics. My opinion leans toward the latter - I admit I'm not well-red in the Bible at all, but I don't remember anything about the second coming being a big boom where thunder and fire rain down and the earth and everyone in it are destroyed in one big cataclysm, which is the way it seems to be spoken of by some people - like one day God is just going to slam his fist on the big red button and Earth goes kaboom.

[AdminAssistant]

Anyone know the details on the "Mayan calendar ends in 2012" thing? Another person I spoke with claimed that not only does it not END, it simply starts over again - but that, further, the Mayan calendar has started over from 1 at another point in the world's history. Any knowledge on this, anyone?

That's my understanding. Honestly, with the Mayan calendar thing, I think the History Channel is just desperate for programming.

[Andara Bledin]

Anyone know the details on the "Mayan calendar ends in 2012" thing?

I've been vaguely interested in this for years, being an old-time Shadowrun fan. And I just read something new about it that I hadn't heard before.

We're currently nearing the end of the "fifth world" or the 5th turn of the Mayan long calendar. The current calendar was based on historical information the Mayans had about the previous calendars and it appears that they always just end, leaving the beginning and charting of the new world up to the people who are there.

Somebody thinks that the fact that the current calendar ends instead of rolling over to be an ominous sign. But from the same article it mentions that the current one was created after it started, too, so I don't see how this is materially different.

I make no claims as to the accuracy of any of this, as I haven't even tried to verify it. I just find the whole concept intriguing.

^-.-^

[Hyena Dandy]

Hyena, I like your idea - but I also kind of wonder if He would appear as something not only underwhelming, but something the average modern rich Christian would scoff at. Something like the "brown hippy" mentioned above. Chances are high that Jesus had at least an Arabic look if not darker skin and probably darker hair, and yet most illustrations we see show him as having light brown hair and being very caucasian - I think these are mostly European depictions that give him a European look to make him seem "familiar" i.e. "like us" ("us" being European people), but I'm not certain. Incidentally, Hyena, one furry comic strip, Kevin and Kell (used to be funny but kind of turned into nonstop computer jokes) did a little "birth of Jesus" storyline, and had Jesus depicted as the same species as whoever is observing Him. I like that idea, since we're supposedly created in God's image and all have the same facial layout, yet details are all extremely different and individual; the question of course being, "Okay, we look like God, so which one of us does God look like?" Not that God MUST have a physical form - I definitely don't imagine Him as a white guy with a beard - but Jesus had a physical form, and could again, and God likely could hold a visible form of some sort.

I don't know how I'd imagine Jesus looking. Probably like the depictions I see in European artwork, but I know that would be not the most accurate.

I honestly doubt Jesus would appear in a way that would offend the ultra-conservative evangelical types, simply because I believe He wouldn't want to go out of His way to offend anyone. I don't think His appearance would offend them. But I think His teachings might.

BTDubs, Skunkle, have you ever checked out Slacktivist.org? Its a very interesting website by a liberal evangelical (turns out they DO exist! =O)

[Ipecac Drano]

Anyone know the details on the "Mayan calendar ends in 2012" thing? Another person I spoke with claimed that not only does it not END, it simply starts over again - but that, further, the Mayan calendar has started over from 1 at another point in the world's history. Any knowledge on this, anyone?

I've never heard of it starting over. AFAIK, it just ends at that date. Plus, if it were to start over "from one at another point in the world's history" and not right after where the previous ended, it would be a woefully inaccurate calendar. That would be like you taking down a wall calendar that ends on 31 December of one year, but the calendar for the next year starts on 26 March.

[Skunkle]

Not to derail the topic, but I read one single post by the guy at Slacktivist, and I'm on. Thanks for the link, Hyena. My opinion of you based on your opinions and writings here and at Customers Suck, already high, just went up a few more notches. Gay Christian furry high five! Heheh...

Seems from what I see here and am reading, the Mayan calendar purports to show that there are multiple, completely different worlds that have happened; that one runs its course, ends, and another begins. What I meant by "starting at one" was that our calendar goes up to 365 days per year, and starts over again at day one - it isn't recorded as "day one" date-wise, but the cycle consisting of (approximately) 365 days repeats. The bits I had heard (which are increasingly sounding like BS) hinted that the Mayan calendar had only so many years, and at a certain point it would hit the end of the cycle and figuratively if not literally begin again at the start, going in a gigantic repeating loop. The person who told me this claimed "...and it has started its cycle over at the beginning before in the earth's history, and the world didn't end then, either"

Either way, there have indeed been predictions by groups large and small over the centuries about when, exactly, the world is going to end. Therein lies my other question: The claim is that the Bible fortells the end times as having lots and lots of problems, disasters and plagues and whatnot. Are we REALLY having more than we're used to? At times, it seems like it...and yet in the past we've had huge earthquakes, at least one if not more than one massive economic depression or collapse, famine, fires that destroyed large cities (London, Chicago etc.), volcanos covering cities (Pompeii and loads of towns and villages in tropical zones) and of course the great plagues of the medieval era. At the same time, people are calling Obama the antichrist? Really, people?

Not to get into a whole 'nother discussion, but... By my estimation, a good half the people who really despise Obama do so only because he's a Democrat, and a good other half don't like him because he's black. I could be wrong. I think these zones overlap. Anyway, he doesn't seem to me to be working heavily towards the "one world government" supposedly prophesized (is that really hinted at in the Bible at all, one world-over organization ruling all?) any more than Bush or Clinton did... And Bush was the one who happily and eagerly suggested we'd be locked in an "endless war" (as much as I think he meant the 'war on terror' in general, I wouldn't have been surprised if he suddenly said he did mean military combat forever).

[IDrinkaRum]

Re: What Jesus will look like when he returns.

Will he really return as a Jew? He's not coming back to take the Jews to Heaven. The Jews aren't the ones who are waiting with bated breath for him to return. (The Messiah hasn't even come to Earth for the Jews).

This means, more than likely, Jesus will return as a Christian and therefore will either be white or black or hispanic. Not Jewish.

At least in my own little world.

[Ipecac Drano]

He is Hispanic.