Book about corporal punsihement has caused death of 3 children

[IDrinkaRum]

The book,called "To Train Up a Child", is written by Tennessee pastor Michael Pearl and his wife

...recommend the systematic use of "the rod" to teach young children to submit to authority. They offer instructions on how to use a switch for hitting children as young as six months, and describe how to use other implements, including a quarter-inch flexible plumbing line. Older children, the Pearls say, should be hit with a belt, wooden spoon or willow switch, hard enough to sting. Michael Pearl has said the methods are based on "the same principles the Amish use to train their stubborn mules."

At least 2 of the children are adopted children from various countries throughout the world. The third child, I believe is American born and the biological child of the parent who punished him to death.

What I don't understand is how people think this book is great and wonderful?

And what do they do with a child on the autism spectrum or has ADHD? Plus, there are children who either have a high tolerance to pain, or do not feel pain (not sure of the medical term, but there are children/adults who have that).

This is absolutely disgusting and scary.

[Gravekeeper]

I....what? The Hell?

Who the fuck thinks this book is wonderful? You're not suppose to raise a child like a feral dog.

[IDrinkaRum]

Carri Williams had praised the book--which advises that "a little fasting is good training"--and had given a copy to a friend, local authorities say.

There's 670,000 copies of the book in circulation (according to the article). Not sure if that includes books waiting to be sold, book sold, books in houses, books in libraries, books in the "free literature" basket at various churches. But 670,000 copies? WTF is wrong with those parents?

[Gravekeeper]

I'm more worried about "various churches". I mean, this guy is a pastor? Dear lord -.-

[IDrinkaRum]

Well, you know ... the Bible does say: "Spare the rod and spoil the child" or something along those lines.

And of course, giving your children the basics (food, water, clothing, shelter) is sometimes just that one thing that will make your child into a raving lunatic serial killer with a preference for old pastors who don't have any idea on how to raise children properly.

Ahem.

Yes, I am worried about this book. And the idiots who read it and follow it.

I do not want to know what is going through their brains when they read it.

[Rageaholic]

I was actually about to bump a thread on physical discipline after I read some FSTDT worthy comments regarding that Judge who belted his daughter. In fact, I remember hearing about these spanking books on FSTDT and quite frankly, it freaks me the fuck out. This was before hearing that it may have caused the death of kids. Because even if they survive these practices, they are going to be mentally fucked up.

If you dare, read some of the reviews of this book.. It's candy coated squick. Some of these reviewers have not only been messed up emotionally, but sexually as well. I remember hearing one person who was STILL suffering the scars of being brought up by this sickos method (30 years later!). This shit RUINS peoples lives and because it's written by a "Christian" author, people think they're doing the lords work and will most likely encourage others to follow suit

Don't even get me started on "Spare the rod spoil the child". Every time I see some dumbass using the bible to support barbaric practices, I want to throw up. It's ironic that so many who claim to profess a religion of "love" and "righteousness" are quick to defend using physical violence as a means to discipline. And yes, it's violence. Any other instance, these people would be charged with assault, but when it's their own kids, it's "discipline".

What. The. Fuck.

[BlaqueKatt]

Well, you know ... the Bible does say: "Spare the rod and spoil the child" or something along those lines.

Don't even get me started on "Spare the rod spoil the child". Every time I see some dumbass using the bible to support barbaric practices, I want to throw up.

actually that is not in the bible-it's from a 17th century poem called Hudibras by Samuel Butler-and it has nothing to do with children, it equates a couples growing love with the growth of a child.

if anyone's interested, the closest biblical verses are explained in great detail here, along with the mistranslations leading to interpretation errors.

[Kheldarson]

Corporal punishment should never be used as a mainstay of discipline. It does have its place, but should never be used to completely traumatize a child. So what the hell are these people thinking?

[Andara Bledin]

On the whole "spare the rod" commentary, this page at GraceThruFaith.com is a fascinating read.

^-.-^

[fireheart17]

Just to clarify, the name of the condition where you can't feel pain is known as CIPA IIRC. And usually for those children, they have to do a LOT to avoid injuring themselves, since pain is the signal that something's wrong.

As for the book, W.T.F. Seriously, beating a child with a switch at 6 months old? I'm sorry, but children are not mules, they do not need to be beaten into authority. Especially not with a switch.

[Rageaholic]

As for the book, W.T.F. Seriously, beating a child with a switch at 6 months old? I'm sorry, but children are not mules, they do not need to be beaten into authority. Especially not with a switch.

Holy shit I missed that part. Though it doesn't surprise me since I recall some posts on FSTDT advocating similar treatment of babies.

[Iseeyouthere]

This makes me me sick...
If I ever see a parent do this to a child... I will take the rod or whatever and whip THEM, the parent, until they bleed.

You TEACH your child the rights and wrongs. You enforce them and reward good behaviour, punishing bad with lack of T.V or Internet.

[IDrinkaRum]

I'm trying to figure out what a 6 month old child could have done to warrant such treatment. I mean ... really! Children that young don't do much except crawl, lay around, sometimes still drool, and poop their diapers. They can be started on "solid" foods like baby cereal. But otherwise? They ain't doing much of anything.

[Boozy]

You TEACH your child the rights and wrongs. You enforce them and reward good behaviour, punishing bad with lack of T.V or Internet.

You know, I can't recall a time growing up that I was rewarded for good behaviour or punished for bad. Things like television were restricted regardless of how we behaved.

My reward was "Good job, honey!" and my punishment was "We're disappointed in you". Verbal encouragement is almost always enough for children who love their parents. Most children really, really want to love their parents and make them happy.

Until those parents start treating them like "stubborn mules" and beating them mercilessly with rods.

[Mishi]

Most children really, really want to love their parents and make them happy.

Until those parents start treating them like "stubborn mules" and beating them mercilessly with rods.

Quoted for truth!
Our girls are so very different to how I was when I was a kid. My mother adhered to the beliefs in that book and others like it. According to her: I was rebellious, stubborn, rude, constantly answering back, antisocial, etc. I was raised to believe that her methods were normal, that everyone's mum/family was like that, that Dad knew all about it and condoned it, that if I went to school that I would be forced to turn away from God and that she was only doing it because she loved me and wanted to help me. From the ages of 7-10, I frequently had bruises from knee to waist and was told that the police would be on her side or that they'd put me in the foster system (Her words: "and we all know what happens to kids that go there"), or that she'd have me charged with verbal assault and locked up, or "I know enough people to have you declared mentally unfit. I can have you put into a psych ward and you will never, ever get out." I can't believe that it took me until she threatened to take the girls away for me to realise just how bad she was/is. She actually screamed at me both times because I didn't go into labour according to her schedule!

Our kids are: friendly, happy, caring, polite, sweet, creative, artistic, well-behaved, independent, stubborn, honest, brave, beautiful, wonderful and strong. They take the adjectives in that list for granted, and it makes me smile when Jazzy rolls her eyes and says "I know that, Mummy! You tell me that all the time!"
It makes me tear up when she says "I know Nana R is mean, but Mummy, if we try hard and ignore her being naughty, then we can teach her how to be nice."
We do give them a light, openhanded smack on the rear when they're doing something that could hurt themselves or someone else, but we ALWAYS explain what they did wrong, why it was a bad idea and how to avoid getting in trouble again. They hate the naughty step and quiet time more, so that's much more commonly used. I have no problems apologising if I'm in the wrong, and they know that.