So, who's telling the truth here?

[mjr]

First story, who's telling the truth? The lady, or Wal-Mart?

http://kfor.com/2015/12/06/woman-hop...ng-experience/

TL;DR: A lady is in line at Wal-Mart. Cashier is struggling with his duties, and is being berated by another customer. Lady steps in and yells at customer (or something). Cashier (of course) thanks lady and hugs her, then tells lady that his mother committed suicide that morning.

Lady then makes "insipirational" video about how we should be nice to each other.

Problem is, Wal-Mart says it never happened, that they spoke to said employee, and said employee says his mother is still alive.

Second story:

http://www.snopes.com/2015/12/02/meijer-cake-glurge/

Snopes says false, but the lady is sticking to her story.

TL;DR:

Lady orders a cake to be decorated. Bakery girl (who we later find out is "not allowed to" decorate cakes) decorates cake. Lady takes it to cashier, who notices writing is...off. They apparently find it funny, so they gather other employees around who start taking pictures. Manager says bakery girl has autism and isn't allowed to decorate cakes (or something like that). Then lady plays the "kindhearted" card and says she wouldn't "let them" discount the cake.

Problem is: The story reeks of red flags. In other words, it hits a lot of the common themes of a hoax. This lady, too, is sticking by her story.

So, in the two stories above, who's telling the truth, and who isn't?

[s_stabeler]

for the first story, it's largely irrelevant, in that the video makes a good point, even if the actual situation is made up.

in the second story, honestly again, the point I got from what she originally said was "be kind when a small mistake has been made"- while the cake may not have been perfect, it was clearly close enough for what the customer wanted. From that perspective, it's irrelevant if the story is true or not.

[Gravekeeper]

for the first story, it's largely irrelevant, in that the video makes a good point, even if the actual situation is made up.

Publicly saying someone's mom killed themselves so you can attention whore on Facebook is pretty shitty. =/

in the second story, honestly again, the point I got from what she originally said was "be kind when a small mistake has been made"

If actually true, it was a violation of the ADA and kinda patronizing of her. Notice how no one on the autism spectrum has anything positive to say about her story.

I don't think we can say either of these scenarios is okay because the "message" is good.

[mjr]

Publicly saying someone's mom killed themselves so you can attention whore on Facebook is pretty shitty. =/

That's pretty much the general consensus. Also, there's also a rumor floating around that she was trying to start up a GoFundMe, until she got exposed.

If attention is what she was looking for, she got it.

If actually true, it was a violation of the ADA and kinda patronizing of her. Notice how no one on the autism spectrum has anything positive to say about her story.

Not only that, but it reeks of "Look at me! I was nice to an autistic person!" And I can also second what you said about people on the autism spectrum not having anything positive to say about her story.

I don't think we can say either of these scenarios is okay because the "message" is good.

Agreed. There are much better ways to get across positive messages. Especially for a lady who apparently says she's some sort of life coach.

[Hyena Dandy]

Whether or not something is true is certainly relevant if it's presented as fact.

[BlaqueKatt]

I don't think we can say either of these scenarios is okay because the "message" is good.

Yeah, it's using/exploiting people for a "look at how good a person I am for helping someone I deem as a lesser/unworthy human, shower *me* with praise." Which is pretty shitty.

Or
"look how great and praiseworthy I am for not being a fuckwit and treating a cashier as a person, I am Sooooo much better than you!"

When did not being a shitty person become bragworthy and praiseworthy?

from this article explaining inspiration porn

Q. But I don’t get it. Why is it so bad if she motivates me to become a better person?

A. Because a) she’s not doing anything particularly motivating and b) she doesn’t exist to motivate you. Reducing a human being – and a stranger, at that – to “inspiring” or “brave” or any of those labels is problematic, because you’re filling in qualities that may or may not be true in order to make yourself feel better. It’s using disabled people as tools for your own betterment.

[mjr]

When did not being a shitty person become bragworthy and praiseworthy?

When people figured out they could upload a video of themselves saying how AWESOME they are, and have other people tell them the same thing. Apparently whether it's true or not.

[s_stabeler]

I was more trying to say the message is good, even if the videos are degrading. (though, strictly speaking it is the store who are in breach of the ADA by talking about the employee's autism)

I happen to agree- if the videos are faked, it's horrible. if they are true, it's still far from brilliant. (being on the autism spectrum myself- Aspergers- it definitely rubbed me the wrong way. Especially since, people forget that Autism Spectrum Disorders are- primarily- communication disorders, not intellectual disorders.

[Mr Hero]

In response to the first story, no matter if Wal Mart is telling the truth or not, the girl is in the wrong.

If Wal Mart is telling the truth, then the girl telling the story is lying to get attention.
If Wal Mart was lying about the cashier's mother, then the entire world knows about this very personal situation the cashier is in.

If she really wanted to raise awareness of how we should treat others, she probably should have left the cashier's situation more vague and just say that he was going through a personal crisis. Still, I feel CS.com and Not Always Right do a better job helping us think about how we treat others working in positions we have no experience in.

And speaking of Not Always Right, I feel like I've read the cake story very recently on there but can't seem to find it.