"Mean Mom" jailed

[Nyoibo]

At six I could name the solar system's planets in order of largest to smallest and from distance average to the sun.

What the hell does that have to do with anything, I know a parrot that can recite Shakespeare.

[AdminAssistant]

At six I could name the solar system's planets in order of largest to smallest and from distance average to the sun. Even at that age, I didn't think Pluto was a real planet. That is not toddler by any means

Well, I could read at four and was generally more intellectually advanced than my peers in elementary school, but that didn't stop me from being a bratty kid sometimes, especially since I didn't have good social skills (the main reason my parents didn't push for me to be moved up grades).

[PepperElf]

they could see their kid ASKING them to drag them like that, because it might be fun.

That's a good point. some kids are weird.

background: i was sent to work in security on my last ship and had a set of handcuffs to carry but no key and i couldn't find a key. so i gave up and ordered my own set of cuffs jsut for the key.

i still have the cuffs and showed them to my little nephew. he insisted i cuff him.
so yes i put handcuffs on him - but only for a minute or two and they were loose enough that he could have pulled them off.

he thought it was the coolest thing ever.



but as for the video.... dragging a kid in public in my opinion is not safe. you don't know what's on the floor... or if there's any thing sharp lying around. sometimes someone drops a pin and you're so busy walking out you don't notice it.


do i think that woman is specifically a child abuser? i don't know. i'm inclined to think not.
i think she just let herself get caught up in her emotions and anger and made a wrong choice.


the whole incident just reminds me of the military and the "commercials" (PSAs) they run on the military TV channels...

like the "don't shake your baby" commercial, or the one that says if you're angry, "it's ok to let your baby cry"

though in all of those situations, the baby is driving the parent crazy at home and not in public.

in public it's a lot harder on a parent these days because... no matter what you do, if your child is having a meltdown there's going to be *someone* looking at you like you're a messed up parent.

[Flyndaran]

What the hell does that have to do with anything, I know a parrot that can recite Shakespeare.

I learned them myself rather than through simple rote parroting. I could also tell you a few facts about each planet. I also deduced that my teacher had hung Jupiter upside down. She didn't appreciate getting corrected by a six year old, but nevertheless fixed the placard.
I also taught myself some reading when I was three.
I just don't think most pre-teen kids are capable of "understanding only the rod". If they have tempers like I did, then hitting only makes them angrier and choose retaliations.

[Nyoibo]

I also deduced that my teacher had hung Jupiter upside down. She didn't appreciate getting corrected by a six year old, but nevertheless fixed the placard.

Technically there is no wrong way up as in a zero gravity environment there is no up.

[DrFaroohk]

I don't think there's anything wrong with dragging a child. Dragging a child across a bed of sandpaper is wrong, but a regular old floor? The way I see it - the child forfeits the right to walk or be carried in a civil manner after they throw a tantrum like that. Next time they come to the store she can try again. Maybe next time she'll remember "Oh wait, I remember when I started acting like a little cuntrag before, mama dragged me out of the store and it was uncomfortable. Glad I remembered it, I'm not gonna do it again. I love you mommy!"

[Greenday]

Leave out the "love you mommy" part and that may be true, sometimes. I don't know too many kids who would appreciate being dragged around on a leash enough that they'd say they love their parents because of it.

[DrFaroohk]

Reading more of these posts, I'm seeing a lot of anti-spanking. That's cool. I don't spank mine, even though I sometimes feel its necessary.

My biggest question to the non-spankers is exactly how do you handle your children? How do you make them listen to you and do what you tell them?

The biggest problem I run into with my 5 year old is that he has realized he can "raise the stakes" farther than I will. In my day that never would have happened. I might raise the stakes a bit, say if my parents wouldnt let me watch this new TV show. I might get upset, and they'd say "Fine, you're gonna act like this, no TV tonight at all." So I might get a little more upset, and they'd say "Fine, you're gonna act like this, it's bedtime. Go to bed. NOW."

At this point, I could either A) continue to be a douchetard, or B) obey and go to bed. I knew that if I chose option A, they would be quick to descend upon me with a firm hand and sharp words. I didn't like getting spanked, and I quickly learned that they could trump any tantrum I might throw.

With mine, he knows that if he chooses option A), it won't lead to anything significant. He can keep being a douchetard, because he knows nothing serious will happen. Oh sure, he might not get to have a snack before bed. OOOOOH BF DEAL. He might also not get to watch a movie before bed. OH NOES! WHAT A HORRIBLE ORDEAL FOR A CHILD!

Even timeouts don't work. I got sick of timeout being playtime for him, so I tried a new rule: Timeout means you sit on your bed and do nothing for 5 whole minutes.

Even that turned into a joke. What the hell? He knows I can't do anything of real consequence to him. Seriously what am I going to do when he doesn't listen to that? NOTHING. Because there's nothing I can do to him. Except for removing his privileges. I can take away his movie and his toys and his snack, but in the end I"m just punishing myself because now, with no toys or anything, he's gone into super-meltdown mode, and now the baby is awake and I'm annoyed and mama is annoyed and we can't do anything about it.

Does anyone else see where I'm going from here? It's hard sometimes. If you get a really good kid, you're lucky. You get one that has to turn every stupud little thing into a monumental argument, good luck to you!

[RecoveringKinkoid]

I actually burst out laughing when I watched the tape.

I"m a terrible person.

Those leashes come with comfy little harnesses. Pulling on one, even pulling hard, will most likely not injure the kid. They hook on snugger than a backpack and don't pull on any one place, at least mine is like that.

That looked a lot more safe than pulling on his little arm, which could dislocate his shoulder. I've seen parents snatch kids up by their arms, which can really injure them.

The lady wasn't jerking on the leash, she was pulling him in a steady, safe speed over a smooth surface. He was not being injured. He was, however, learning that throwing himself down on the floor and playing Ghandi in order to keep Mommy from walking anywhere doesn't work so well as he thought it might.

Would I do that? No, probably not. But I wouldn't automatically assume she's a child abuser if I saw someone else doing it. Kids can act like little shits in public. The same people that called the cops would be all pissed and indignant if her kid was running around like an undisciplined animal.

People (mostly people who either don't have kids, or have feral kids they never discipline) think every act of discipline is a child abuse, and then bitch about how kids are so terrible to be around.

DrFaroohk, I don't know what to tell you. I'm luc ky enough to have a good kid, although she does have her moments. believe you me. She has been spanked on very, very rare occasions. Spanking over here consists of a light swat on the butt, once. I don't even have to swat her hard enough to sting, she is so offended at the indignity of it that just popping her lightly is enough. It gets her attention, and I've only done it in instances where immediate and extreme discipline was needed. I don't even have to do it very often, the warning of "Do I need to pop your bottom?" is 99% of the time enough to straighten her out.

My sister's boy, however, is much harder to discipline. She doesn't swat him, ever. I don't know if he's tougher to discipline because he's a boy, or because he's just more onery, or because he knows he's never gonna get swatted. No way to know.

I think sometimes if time out and taking privledges away is not working, you maybe ought to try something else. The danger with physical punishment, however, is that you don't want to be out of control with anger when you do it, because you HAVE to be in absolute control you don't do something you don't mean to do. I'm fortunate enough to be an older parent, so my fuse is a lot longer and burns a lot slower. In my younger days, I might have had to enforce a "no spanking" rule on myself, I was a hothead.

But yeah, you do have to be able to live with the consequences of your discipline. Sometimes it sucks for you, too, but that's just the way it is. Consider it taking one for the team. If the kid realizes you won't follow through with a punishment because you'll suffer, too, you're done. So never make a threat you won't or can't follow through on. (I once had to call friends and tell them I couldn't come out to swim in the pool and do a campfire jam with them because I told my girl that if she refused to take a nap, we couldn't come over. Had to follow through. Sucked. But you know what? Next time, she took the damn nap. .)