Should managers kick parents of screaming children out of their store?

[guywithashovel]

But (and this is a big "but"): There are places where children just don't belong. And I don't mean just strip clubs and R-rated movies. I mean fancy restaurants, upscale boutiques with breakable goods, and other public places where a child can't be reasonably expected to behave appropriately. My sister doesn't take her toddler to five-star restaurants, not just out of respect for the proprietors and patrons, but also because forcing her son to sit still and be quiet for very long is cruel and unusual for someone his age.

Yeah, I don't think people should bring kids to fancy restaurants, bars, and other such places (in most circumstances). That has the potential to be cruel to both the other people there as well as the kids. I'll even add dinner parties and other adult-centered social events to the list of places where kids should probably not be taken. I can remember one time when I was a little kid, my parents drug me to a card party (where they played cards---either Poker or Euchre) that was hosted by someone my dad worked with. I spent most of the night being extremely bored. There were other kids there, but I didn't have much fun with them. The boys went off and played some kind of "shoot 'em up" game with nerf guns, and a few kids ended up getting hurt (very mildly). The girls got to playing with an Easy-Bake oven and ended up getting flour all over one of the bedrooms. I'm sure this put a damper on the fun the adults were having with their card games, since they had to stop periodically to settle the kids' disagreements, clean up the messes, and comfort the ones who were upset.

[BroomJockey]

In all honesty, I think that if people are going to go out in public, they should learn to tolerate some annoyances from other people. This includes tolerating fussy children.

http://www.cracked.com/article_15231...miserable.html

First thing on this list. BAM. 100% agreement!

[violetyoshi]

My daughter will scream and cry but then again, it's probably because something has set her off. (A cell phone rang, a random person, too much noise, etc.)

We have a bag of tricks that we take with us when we go out. It's got books, coloring books, crayons, stickers, a stuffie or two. One of 2 Leapsters.

We still get dirty looks at like Red Lobster or Macaroni Grill when we bring our child. (And that's before she opens her mouth).

I'm not saying all children who are having meltdowns are Autistic. However, keep in mind: When a child's having a metldown due to Autism, it's very hard to calm them down.

You can explain to people the situation of your child having Autism. As far as getting dirty looks, that's just the way it is. People have a right to have a nice dinner without "WAAAAAAH! WAAAAH!" in their ear. If your so sensitive about it, order out.

I've seen much more agressive behavior from parents in general, when they don't get their way about something. I have Asperger's Syndrome, which is also a form of Autism. It's a higher-functioning form of Autism. I also have Hyperacusis, as it would seem your daughter does.

Try to imagine when you are older and your daughter is unable to go anywhere, without feeling anxiety that someone will make a sudden loud noise, and they will have to cover their ears or yell out in pain. This is a reality for me, and may be for your daughter in the future.

This should be of great concern for you. It's parents who refuse to be responsible for their crying child, that make life hell for people with Hyperacusis. If you try to explain the situation to the parent, they tend to lash out at you, saying your not a parent and don't understand, or some other self justification for why they are entitled to ignore your pain.

If you want to make this world better for people like your daughter, be an example. As a parent, call out other parents who let their children cry, explaining that there are people in this world for who that crying is much more than an annoyance, it causes them real significant pain.

I am one of the people who give parents dirty looks, because I have found out that 9 times out of 10, talking to them and explaining my situation is completely futile. You have a chance to make a difference, and see that in the future parents learn to listen to people who are not parents.

Understand that a person who politely asks that you move your child elsewhere, will become the person who gives dirty looks at any parent with small children, unless they respectfully respond to their request. This does not mean, having to move elsewhere if you are already sitting down. It does mean if you are about to sit down, and someone says they have a low tolerance for crying children, that you politely see if there is another place to sit. Even showing that you are giving effort to see if there is another place to sit, is enough to show that your not simply dismissing the person. Or acting like a entitled parent.

It's this that really is the main problem I have with this. I'm not asking someone to sit their small child away from me, or to sit away from small children cause I'm annoyed, a child hater, or whatever. It's because I have a real condition that causes me real pain and suffering, when I hear a child cry or scream in a high-pitched way.

I actually like children, because as a part of Asperger's Syndrome, I'm interested in things people would presume is immature for my age. Such as watching cartoons. I personally think people would be less grumpy, if they would watch say more Spongebob, and learned to laugh at themselves but that's just me. I also do visit a couple kid oriented MMORPGs, Pixie Hollow & Club Penguin which are both owned by Disney. I feel I'm able to help as an adult, in regards to moderating the sites.

So that's really my main issue with parents and screaming crying children. This always tends to turn into a really long rant, since I'm used to people not understanding me, or assuming the answer is to wear earplugs 24/7 which actually makes Hyperacusis worse not better. You also can't wear earplugs while eating, unless you like to hear yourself chew.

This is a reminder that there are disabilities or issues that people have, that are not seen. I do not look like someone with Asperger's Syndrome, by that I don't behave as is stereotypically referred to with people who have Autism. I mean, someone who is Aspie most likely would be able to guess I have Asperger's Syndrome, but not the average person who is uneducated about the Autism Spectrum.

When someone tells you they have a problem, it's not attention grabbing behavior either, I don't like having to explain myself to someone, only to be yelled at and then thrown into an anxiety attack because they're too ignorant or selfish to listen to what I was saying.

There's this presumption that whenever a person is suggesting something like a parent should sit elsewhere with their small child, it's a personal attack on their child. The reality is to most people all small children are the same, they tend to scream and cry. Parents who are in denial of this, such as one parent who told me their child never misbehaves, are the worst. I am trying to do a favor to the parent. Do they want to have to explain to their child why the girl at the table near them is reacting and covering their ears, whenever the child gets loud?

If I hated kids, would I care that I could make a child cry or feel bad about themselves, if I reacted in a way I cannot control to their loud noises? The truth is the people who don't care about children, are the people who wouldn't go out of their way to inform the parent about their situation. They would feel entitled to behaving the way they wanted, and that people should just have to live with it. When you grow up in Special Ed, and are constantly told something is wrong with you as a person, because of your natural reactions to sensory stimuli that hurt you, you feel you need to feel like a freak and explain to other people your situation.

Maybe I should stop doing that. Maybe I should just say, well whatever, I'm not going to let them ruin my good time. If the child has a problem with my behavior, after I explained the situation to the parent, and they still sit near me, they'll have to deal with it. It's not like I have tried to explain this, I really do want to clarify that, it's that I usually am treated aggressively by the parent I explain it to afterwards.

I hope this helps people understand. As well as the mods, understanding that this is not off-topic, if they should think so. This is at the heart a issue dealing directly with the issue of parents and screaming children. I always feel conflicted about this, because I have tried everything I can think of, to make this situation easier for all parties involved. After being yelled at and belittled by the 4th or 5th parent I stopped trying. Parents have to understand there are people who are outside their world, and their children, and that they deserve to be treated respectfully too.

[Lace Neil Singer]

I once had to deal with an EPFH (Entitled Parent From Hell) at a point where I was sitting on a park bench, quietly reading my book and smoking. The EPFH came up to me and started bleating on about how my smoke was giving her children cancer.

Bitch please. *eye roll * First of all, I was nowhere near her children at the time; I'd deliberately chosen a bench far away from the play area so that the children wouldn't disturb me. Second, the road where a hundred vehicles are letting off fumes was just as close to them as I was. I basically told her to go jump in the river. I'm usually polite to people, but this request drove me up the wall.

It's people like her who give all parents a bad name, and is the reason why a lot of people are so intolerant of children. I try to be nice, I really do; I just don't see why some people feel that the fact that they have spawned gives them a free ticket to be downright rude and nasty to everyone. -.-

[boringscreenname]

We don't take our son to upscale restaurants, we only go to family oriented places. We always get comments on how well behaved he is. When we want to go out somewhere that's not child friendly then we just leave him with a baby sitter. Fortunately we have family who's willing to babysit for free. We also have to get creative with our entertainment when we can't go out, but that's part of being a parent is being flexible and adapting your schedule and lifestyle to work around your child's. We are far from socially isolated, we still do tons of fun and cool things with and without the kiddo.

We have taken him to the movie theater several times and he has been fine. We feed him before we leave, and when we get to the theater he either hangs out in the stroller or our laps and usually winds up taking a nap.

We also take him to the bookstore frequently and he gets a new toy or book every time we go. It keeps his attention while we browse and read for a bit, and he's perfectly happy to sit in his stroller and play with his new toy. I fgure $10-$15 is worth it for an hour of quiet time, coffee and reading.

I think that in restuarants or other smaller businesses that if a child starts crying and throwing a fit and is disturbing other patrons then the management, should be able to ask the parents to leave. Or the parent could just take their child outside of the establishment let their kid throw a fit, calm down, get under control and go back inside.