Man refuses to pay child support for prostitute's child

[RecoveringKinkoid]

We aren't talking about what the woman's responsibility is.

We're discussing weather the man should pay child support. The answer in my opinion is "yes, he should."

All the arguing in the world about the woman's responsibilty in the situation does not change the fact that the man is responsibile for paying child support.

Did the woman act irresponsibly? Yes. We aren't trying to determine that. I think we can all agree that she probably did. As far as the man's responsibility, that is neither here nor there and doesn't change anything.

Bad news, DrFaroohk. Got an epiphany for ya. Ready? "Life is not fair." You can complain all you want about life is not fair, how women lie, how humans have sex for pleasure, blah blah blah. None of it matters. This is because the reality of it is that if you ejaculate into a woman's vagina, you have a pretty good chance of making a baby, and that no part of life on earth is fair.

Which, unfortunately, that child will learn very, very soon.

And while I'm at it, let's talk about the "dipping his wick" statement. The guy's wife did not agree to have sex with a guy who fucks skanky (and I'm sorry, you fuck strange guys for a living and are too low to even make them wear a rubber, you're a skank.) whores on the sly and then comes home and brings God knows what into her marriage bed. She's under the impression that the man is clean, and she should be able to assume that. Yet she can't. He's putting her LIFE in danger, and not disclosing what he's doing. Talk about a breech of contract.

[SteverinoNY!]

Good Point RK...ok so as a man, it isn't fair for him to have to pay child support, but how is it fair for the child to grow up fatherless? That baby did not choose to be born to a prostitute as a result of the guy paying her for sex. And for that matter, the prostitute did not choose to have a baby, as birth control can fair and condoms can break. The man should pay up and support his child. It's not him being a father, but its better than nothing. That child is unfortunately learning before he or she can even walk that life is not fair and thats a real tragedy.

[DrFaroohk]

So we're basically enabling women here? "Hey, lie cheat and steal your way to getting pregnant and get a free paycheck for the next 18 years of your life!"

If the man is equally responsible he NEEDS to have equal say in the outcome. You can't have both. He either has equal responsibility and he also has the choice to have or not have the child or he doesn't. You can't keep making up rules just to benefit the poor, weak, infallible woman.

Abortion IS an option. Just because it's an option you may not like doesn't change anything. It's there. It can be done. It's not like taking a 6 month old baby and bashing its head against the rocks. And yeah, life isn't fair, so sometimes you have to make choices you don't want to. I could argue that while wearing a condom is an option, its not an option for me. Makes just about as much sense doesn't it?

This should be a lesson to women everywhere: You want to make sure your kid is supported? Make sure the guy you're with is on the same page.

[SteverinoNY!]

So we're basically enabling women here? "Hey, lie cheat and steal your way to getting pregnant and get a free paycheck for the next 18 years of your life!"

If the man is equally responsible he NEEDS to have equal say in the outcome. You can't have both. He either has equal responsibility and he also has the choice to have or not have the child or he doesn't. You can't keep making up rules just to benefit the poor, weak, infallible woman.

Abortion IS an option. Just because it's an option you may not like doesn't change anything. It's there. It can be done. It's not like taking a 6 month old baby and bashing its head against the rocks. And yeah, life isn't fair, so sometimes you have to make choices you don't want to. I could argue that while wearing a condom is an option, its not an option for me. Makes just about as much sense doesn't it?

This should be a lesson to women everywhere: You want to make sure your kid is supported? Make sure the guy you're with is on the same page.

Women are not being enabled by this whole debate. The man does have equal say. He makes the choice to potentially have a child when he sticks his penis into a woman's vagina. I am sorry. But the equal responsibility ends there. He's got the responsibility to do whatever it takes on his end to prevent a pregnancy. And all of the birth control techniques are not flawless. News flash to you DrF, he's responsible for that child as soon as he engages in the act of sexual reproduction. That is how the law sees it and you should abide by the law.

Ok, abortion may be an option in this country. But it may not be in the beliefs of the mother, just like wearing a condom is not in your beliefs. But, it is a hell of a lot easier for a man to put on a condom than it is for a female to have an abortion. There are no psychological after effects associated with wearing a condom. You would do yourself well to put a condom on and avoid putting your significant other or future children through the pain of growing up with a father who doesn't give a shit about them. I suggest getting a snip snip because you don't seem like fatherly material anyway.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Well, DrFaroohk, all I can say is that considering your past posts, you're arguing from a pretty shakey platform here.

[McDreidel09]

If wearing a condom is not an option for you,then you shouldn't bitch that the girl ended up pregnant because pills are not 100%. Not all women "trap" men. My mother certainly didn't "trap" my father. They just made a stupid decision.

I said that for SOME people it is not an option. It doesn't matter what you compare it to, some people don't like the idea of having an abortion.

If you get a woman pregnant, you should pay up. Men need to be responsible also. It's not all the woman. You need a sperm to fertilize an egg. How does sperm get to the egg? By being ejaculated into a penis.

If one does not want a kid, then they should either not have sex or take the best precautions available. Pairing up pills and condom would be good. I am on the pill right now and I would make sure the man wears a condom also. If he doesn't want to, then no sex.

A real man steps up and takes responsibility. If he gets a woman pregnant, he helps support the child. He also does it without complaining and admits that he made a mistake and now he must do what is right. If a man's pay is cut, he still has to pay child support. It is just like a married couple having children. Both parties must take care of their children, not matter what.

I'm also not getting how you associate child support with full responsibility. Child support is HELPING the mother support the child. The mother must also work and do what she can to support the child.

Take it from a person who was raised by a single mother. That child support really helps out.

[BroomJockey]

We aren't talking about what the woman's responsibility is.

If someone feels it's germane to the discussion, yeah, we are.

[SteverinoNY!]

If someone feels it's germane to the discussion, yeah, we are.

I thought we already determined according to myself, McDreidel, and RK, that responsibility was 50-50. Could you please explain why one party is more responsible than the other? I would be intrigued to hear this one.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Okay. Let me rephrase that then.

I'M not talking about what the woman's responsibility is.

But if I were, I'd be happy to have it on record that the woman is an irresponsible idiot.

As are most woman who willingly have sex without making absolutely certain that they don't get knocked up with the child of an irresponsible cretin who isn't man enough to step up and do the right thing.

Hooker too irresponsible/stupid to make john wear a rubber= Irresponsible idiot.

So, ladies, just to make sure we all understand who is responsible here: You kind of control the playing field here. Man shows up innappropriately dressed, you should really use the Refusal of Service contingent. Sort of like "No Shoes, No, No Shorts, No Service" thing.

However, gents, you get in and get served anyways, as a special favor, just remember: those kind of favors come with price tags.

[McDreidel09]

Thank you RK. I really agree. Responsibility is 50/50. If a couple ends up with a child when they didn't plan to, that is their price to pay for those few minutes of pleasure.

I know, my focus was a little more on the guy on my posts, but that was because I was saying why he should pay child support, as was the original discussion.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Same here. I am in no way saying the woman is free of blame here.

Way I see it is this: Woman's responsibility for her own screwed up life due to unwanted pregnancy: 100%
Man's responsibility for his own screwed up life due to unwanted pregnancy: 100%.

Child's responsibility for his own screwed up life due to unwanted pregnancy: 0%

Man's responsibility to make Child's life as unscrewed up as he can possibly make it from that point on, by doing 100% everything he can do up to and including paying child support and shutting the hell up with the complaining: 100%.

Woman's responsibility to make Child's life as unscrewed up as she can possibly make it from that point on, by doing 100% everything she can do up to and including paying child support and shutting the hell up with the complaining: 100%.

I didn't leave a lot of grey area in there for a reason.

[BroomJockey]

Could you please explain why one party is more responsible than the other?

I'm not taking part in this discussion, however, in one of the lesser used capacities of moderators, I'm simply pointing out that it's not up to any one member, or coalition of members, to declare "this is not a valid portion of this topic, so leave it alone," if someone else wishes to address it as part of the topic.

[BlaqueKatt]

So we're basically enabling women here? "Hey, lie cheat and steal your way to getting pregnant and get a free paycheck for the next 18 years of your life!"

Yeah because the $100-$400 a month she's getting to SUPPORT THE CHILD is totally enough for her to just sit around and do nothing but par-tay all the time(that's barely enough for diapers and formula).

Oh wait she still has to raise the child, work, pay for daycare and deal with everything that comes with being a parent while the guy gets out of it by writing a check-yeah so damn easy for the woman and so terrible for the man.

This should be a lesson to women everywhere: You want to make sure your kid is supported? Make sure the guy you're with is on the same page.

I was on the pill and we used a condom-still got pregnant-abortion was not an option(we wanted kids just not that soon)-you can say it is all you want-but hey a bullet to the head is an "option" too in that case. We got married lasted a year. So at that point when my son was a year old we were no longer on the same page-what then?

Should I have tried to get a retro active abortion? Guess what 9 times out of 10 the man can just walk away and sign a monthly check while the woman has to deal with all the parenting responsibilities-how is that fair to the woman if they both agreed to have a child?

I've known guys that left their partners right after the baby they wanted was born because they "didn't realize how hard it was going to be". Heck my biological father left when my mom was 4 months pregnant because "she got fat" and he "didn't want to be tied down"-he wanted me, but he walked out on us. He changed his mind after the fact.(my mother did about my twin at around three months)

[RecoveringKinkoid]

This should be a lesson to women everywhere: You want to make sure your kid is supported? Make sure the guy you're with is on the same page.

Actually, this should be a lesson to women everywhere, all right. Don't fuck irresponsible males who aren't willing to do the right thing. That goes especially for ones that don't want to take the responsibility of their part of the "safe sex" equation.

It's also a lesson to guys everywhere. Don't want to get hit with a responsibility you don't want? Make sure you're with a girl who is on the same page. And make sure you wear a damn condom. Because if neither of you want to get knocked up, and you don't wear a condom, then you are hardly on the same page.

[Cat]

Just wanted to to thrown in my 2 cents.

I'm saying people shouldn't be having children if its not an agreed upon situation. It's not fair for one person to just decide it's going to happen and then dump all the responsibility on another. It's not fair to either one of the parents and it's ESPECIALLY not fair to the child. There are many many ways to avoid getting pregnant, and even after you're pregnant there are things that can be done about it. Once again, life is full of difficult decisions. "Should I just go ahead with the procedure, or should I have this unwanted baby that will never know his father and never be properly supported because I made a selfish decision and decided to bring a life into a world that wasn't ready for it?" A message to all women like this prostitute: It's not all about you.

I am female, and Dr.F.....I agree with you here. I was going to post something similar, but ya already said it.