British Teachers Propose Replacing the Word "Fail" with "Deferred Success"

[jackfaire]

I would like to fail at throwing myself at the ground.

[blas87]

Lots of people fail at wiping their ass, otherwise we wouldn't call them racing streaks or skid marks, now would we?

The green people/earth freaks need to shut the hell up about only using one square of toilet paper (yes, it's TOILET PAPER) or cutting down on it. Sure, a lot of women go overboard using half a roll to pee, but I mean, you cannot get every single cling-on with just a few squares of paper.

[jackfaire]

*Looking at teacher on the ground* I didn't kick you that was just a deferred boot in the ass.

[Lace Neil Singer]

I see them do stuff like that at horse shows. When the kids are real little and just learning, I think it's great that they all get a pat on the back. Once they are old enough to understand the difference, it's time to teach them sportsmanship...and yes, that means letting them fail and go home empty handed once in awhile.

Agreed. One of the worst examples of sportsmanship I ever saw at a gymkhana was one of the kids who had her own horse wailing, "But I didn't get anything!" when she came last in the "ride and run" race. She then pointed at me, who had come first and screeched, "But she only has a riding school horse! She shouldn't have won!"

The reason she lost was cuz a) she fluffed her dismounting and b) she couldn't get her horse to go above a walk, mainly cuz she was walking ahead of him pulling on his reins. She was sharply told to be quiet and the reasons why she lost; today, she probably would have been given a pat, a "there there" and a ribbon for taking part. -.- Which wouldn't have taught her anything.

[DesignFox]

Usually with horse shows a tie for a ranking just means the one above it isn't awarded eg. 1st, 3rd, 3rd, 4th and so on, methinks judge was a little softy.

Yes, the judge was a bit of a softie. You're correct that when there is a tie, they tend to "skip a place"... since the shows I was attending only pinned out to 6th place and there were 7 of us in the class, by declaring 6th place a tie, she didn't deprive the people who beat us of anything, and it kept that last person from feeling discouraged. Not all judges will do that. Let's face it, it's not so bad not placing when there's 8 or more people. But when you're the ONLY one? That's kinda rough. Obviously, us big girls suck it up and keep going, but it's not a good feeling. I am pleased to say that I haven't had that happen very often. Exactly twice that I can remember. The first time the judge gave us the "tie," the second time I just made sure I rode better than that last person...and it never happened again. (not to say I haven't come away from a show empty handed before...just not been that "odd man out")

Agreed. One of the worst examples of sportsmanship I ever saw at a gymkhana was one of the kids who had her own horse wailing, "But I didn't get anything!" when she came last in the "ride and run" race. She then pointed at me, who had come first and screeched, "But she only has a riding school horse! She shouldn't have won!"

<snip>

I'm not ashamed to admit that I take a certain bit of pleasure from winning against someone like that.

Some of the true hunter barns around here get pretty snobby like that. My instructor and I like to put their noses out of joint every once in awhile.

Last year, we were competing with one barn in particular (on a friendly basis- our trainers both know and have a lot of respect for one another). Anyway, all was pretty well when they didn't consider me a threat- I was a beginner and I ride an old horse that isn't exactly fancy. As soon as I started beating their fancy horses and became a threat to the leading rider, claws came out! The final show of the season I was neck and neck with their rider. Out of the woodwork they called EVERYONE they knew and placed them in my division to sabotage the class. (they were also doing underhanded stuff like clucking when we were supposed to halt by the fence...crap like that) Unfortunately, it worked (and very nearly backfired on themselves). LOL I ended up missing Grand Champion by 2 points...(I was happy with Reserve, though).

I was actually flattered to be considered such a "threat". I know if it came between myself and their person, I would have won. When they commented about us "doing dressage, too" my trainer said, "Oh, that's our focus. Fox here is the dressage training level Champion... We just do the hunter stuff for fun." I thought the woman was gonna fall off her horse! XD

It's all good, though. Hunter/Jumpers are a bit of a game that way... you have to be prepared for the politics.

[Lace Neil Singer]

Yeah; it always used to amuse me and the other riding school kids when the horse owners used to be so bratty and bad losers. XD One horse I used to ride a lot was a half Morgan mare named Ebony. She could be a real bitch, and had a really angular back and neck; definitely not a looker. Yet, she was a godsend when it came to gymkhana races cuz she'd stand like a rock if you were dismounting or grabbing a flag or baton, so I often did win with her, despite her not being one of the fastest. XD

Once during a lesson, the instructer teamed the speedy horses against the slower horses, just to make a point. I was on the slower horse team, and the team won; simply cuz the slower horses were generally better at standing still, leading, bending and staying in the right pace. Speed isn't everything; if you go too fast in a bending race, you'll only knock a pole down. XD

[Savannah]

If this happens in America, I'm seriously thinking of pulling my daughter out of school and home schooling her.

You'd better start looking into it; one of my professors told us her son isn't allowed to say "I can't" at his school. Umm...sometimes you really can't do something. Wouldn't it be better to let the kids acknowledge it and work with them rather than telling them they can't (heh) acknowledge it?

People fail. People can't do everything. Where did we get the idea that everyone should be equal at everything?