Of bogus sexual harassment claims and a collage degree myth (long)

[Plaidman]

It's always the actions of the few that ruin it for all.

There were people that did say things like you look real good. It's the tone, and you just know that they mean more then a simple compliment, and some women can honestly feel the men undressing them with their eyes (which some guys, in a group, would honestly go Oh yeah, I totally bang that ass man! I wish could do that now man!"

Where do you draw the line? If you go oh it's fine to say you look nice today, you will have the men that drool, sneer and wink at the girls, and just say you look nice today. When confronted, they act butthurt and go "All I said was she looked nice today!"

We've all heard it from customers, so don't act like no-one ever would lie about that.

So best way, to nip it in the bud? Make it illegal to make anything complimantary.

It does go both ways. Women cannot say you look great in those pants, or that shirt is hot on you. (Though many males may like that attention).


As for the girl claiming that boss told her his son was intrested in you, that COULD be considered a threat. Like, date my son or your gone. If you date my son, you better not hurt him or your ass is gone.

That's why these things exist. To just cut it in the bud.

Some people may generally just think they look good today. But your not there. You did not live that women's life. SOme women may have been repeatedly raped by their fathers/mothers/brothers/sisters/Uncles etc etc etc etc that started by You look nice. Not saying all women that claim SH have had that happen, but in their mindview, it's the first thing that is said before being forced to do something.

They may have been played alot in life, by guys (or girls) always going on how great they look, only to fuck them and leave them.

Work is suppose to be safe. (HA! HA HA! Safe like school!), and they should never have to hear any type of remarks if they don't want to hear it. Sure, its a nice thing to hear, but what if they don't want to hear it? Are they suppsoe to just take it? How long do they have to take it, before some people remarks get more and more and more sexual, until its basically them being groped and males defense is "She always let me do it before, why is she bitching now?" (After all, some males think that all SH are just bullshit. Even if the women was tied up, gangraped, videotaped of her crying thrown on the net, and said "Well she shouldn't have looked so hot!! She just doing it for attention! She did it to get them fired! She just jealous of the people there!"

SH Does exist. Not matter what you think otherwise, it does exist.

[KnitShoni]

No one is saying it doesn't exist. People are just pointing out that not everything that gets reported as sexual harassment really is. Kind of like racism. Yes, it exists. Not every case that's purported to be racism actually is.

[Red Panda]

It's always the actions of the few that ruin it for all.

There were people that did say things like you look real good. It's the tone, and you just know that they mean more then a simple compliment, and some women can honestly feel the men undressing them with their eyes (which some guys, in a group, would honestly go Oh yeah, I totally bang that ass man! I wish could do that now man!"

We better just get rid of all compliments. After all, who knows when somebody says that you have a nice car they don't really mean your vagina, or if that the person you are saying made a well informed presentation wasn't raped by their father one time after they made a presentation on why he should stop raping them.

Maybe we should play it safe and ban all talking. When a guy says the copier is broken I know what he really means.

[Plaidman]

Leave it to you to nitpick.

Fine. Take away anything that is complimentary on how one LOOKS in a workplace.

[HEMI6point1]

It's always the actions of the few that ruin it for all.

There were people that did say things like you look real good. It's the tone, and you just know that they mean more then a simple compliment, and some women can honestly feel the men undressing them with their eyes (which some guys, in a group, would honestly go Oh yeah, I totally bang that ass man! I wish could do that now man!"

Where do you draw the line? If you go oh it's fine to say you look nice today, you will have the men that drool, sneer and wink at the girls, and just say you look nice today. When confronted, they act butthurt and go "All I said was she looked nice today!"

Your first paragraph: Although some won't admit it, every straight guy has done the "undress her with his eyes" thing (I called it sex by eyeball in the NOW thread). Hell, even women do it too (though not as often as guys, LOL). It's a natural human thought process. To demonize it as some sort of bad thing or "gross" is wrong. And IMO if a straight man ever tells me he never undresses a woman with his eyes I'll tell him to go to Bed Bath & Beyond and turn in his man card!

Your second paragraph: Yes, some men will take it too far. I would never drool at a woman or sneer at her, but that's just me.

[Plaidman]

Although some won't admit it, every straight guy has done the "undress her with his eyes" thing. It's a natural human thought process. To demonize it as some sort of bad thing or "gross" is wrong.

Your second paragraph: Yes, some men will take it too far. I would never drool at a woman or sneer at her, but that's just me.

I never said it was a bad thing. But don't make it obvious. Alot do. It can make some women uncomfortable. I've had coworkers that did that. They stare right at another coworker chest and greet them, saying how nice they looked. Coworker told manager (Another woman). Manager told higher ups. HR got involved. Couldn't fire the guy for SH, because all he did was say how nice another girl looked. This is why SH exists to protect. Why should the woman just /take/ it as some people suggested, because all he is doing is /complimenting/ her. No. It's more then that.

Do some women take it too far? Yeah. That is possible. But more often then not, it's exactly how it was stated. If you make it so it you cannot file SH on the guy that stares at breasts, and does very erotic facial expressions, but then only says "You look great today!", then what? She just needs to accept the fact that asshole is going to do that, and be protected by not stating "Lets fuck?"

At least that coworker guy did get fired eventally. He was transfered to another store, where he did just grab another coworker's chest (Then claimed that he was just trying to kill the fly that landed on it).


It was the actions of several men that did this. I'm glad it happen. Here is a great way to get around it though. Learn about the women. Be her friend. Compliment her as a friend. I've done that for years. The women know I mean it. But if a girl doesn't know you from jack, and you just randomly run into her at workplace, and then go on how great she looks, that she looks nice, and that is pretty much the only subject you talk about whenever you see her is taht "YOU LOOK HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!", then yeah. Pretty easy to see what your really thinking.

[jackfaire]

Your first paragraph: Although some won't admit it, every straight guy has done the "undress her with his eyes" thing (I called it sex by eyeball in the NOW thread). Hell, even women do it too (though not as often as guys, LOL). It's a natural human thought process. To demonize it as some sort of bad thing or "gross" is wrong. And IMO if a straight man ever tells me he never undresses a woman with his eyes I'll tell him to go to Bed Bath & Beyond and turn in his man card!

Your second paragraph: Yes, some men will take it too far. I would never drool at a woman or sneer at her, but that's just me.

I am going to turn in my human card because I have nothing in common with your species.

[HEMI6point1]

I never said it was a bad thing. But don't make it obvious. Alot do. It can make some women uncomfortable.

At least that coworker guy did get fired eventally. He was transfered to another store, where he did just grab another coworker's chest (Then claimed that he was just trying to kill the fly that landed on it).

I don't make it obvious, I know how to be discrete about it. Like you said however some men don't.

And yeah that guy deserved to be fired. That's what happens when you lose the understanding between fantasy and reality. Kill a fly? LOL!

[protege]

I don't make it obvious, I know how to be discrete about it. Like you said however some men don't.

Yep, there's a big difference between 'checking someone out' and 'undressing them with your eyes.' I readily admit that I do check out the ladies. What can I say, other than it's totally natural. Also, women can be just as bad

[smileyeagle1021]

My favorite example of BS SH was when I worked at the hotel call center. An openly gay guy said to a girl something like "OMG, I love your hair, what is your secret" ... and she thought it was a come on... because you know, all gay guys want to sleep with you. Fortunately the supervisor told her just how stupid her complaint was rather than actually pursuing it.

As far as the tests go for college degrees... while I do like the idea of using more applied assignments like presentations or projects to be the major part of the grade, there is a point where you have to find some way of seeing whether or not there is an understanding of the core principles, and tests are the best way to do that as of yet.

[Plaidman]

My favorite example of BS SH was when I worked at the hotel call center. An openly gay guy said to a girl something like "OMG, I love your hair, what is your secret" ... and she thought it was a come on... because you know, all gay guys want to sleep with you. Fortunately the supervisor told her just how stupid her complaint was rather than actually pursuing it.

I have a great story of a BS SH that is like that. It was an awesome thing to see unfold. I mean, it was epic, and it really blew in that jackass face that started it when lawyers and cops saw through his epic bullshit.


If anyone wants to hear it, I'm willing to share...

[Rapscallion]

Please, me wanty.

Rapscallion

[Plaidman]

XD It was a long time ago. Like ...5 years ago, but I still remember alot of it. Names have been changed to make it easier to write rather then doing what I normally do.


Dwayne was my first manager. He was gay. He was awesome, and he never shouted it out or anything but it was just known he was gay. He was the one that fought the hardest to get me hired, even given examples of when I walked like, two miles to get to another Plaid pantry, just to fill out an application to give to him to give to area manager that was coming in, and that was through the snow!

Anyway, I was eventally sent to another store that needed help. During this time, Dwayne hired Jason who also needed a job. Dwayne thought Jason would be a good worker because he acted alot like me, except far more relaxed. Jason was also homeless, and needing a place to stay. Dwayne did offer his place for a week or so, and only a week. Jason did leave after a week. (IMPORTANT).


Anyway, Halloween came around and Dwayne had assigned Jason to work that shift. Jason refused. Fine. Dwayne got another person to cover it. Thanksgiving comes around. Dwayne assigns Jason to cover it. Jason comes up with some bulllshit excuse that he has to go to New York for family on that day. Fine. Dwayne gets another person, and another worker managed to find Jason drinking at a bar (took photos). Jason later admits he doesn't want to work it. Christmas comes. Again, Jason is assigned, he refuses. Dwayne is losing temper on this but he is a good guy at heart. He tells Jason he has a choice, work Christmas or work new years eve. Jason says he'll work new years eve.

Day before new years eve comes. Dwayne comes in to work day shift and take over for Jason. While Dwayne is counting last nights money/sales in the backroom Jason leaves. Dwayne comes out eventally when a customer wanders into backroom looking for someone. Dwayne sees a nice big notice on the computer from Jason

"I absoutly REFUSE TO WORK NEW YEARS EVE!"

Dwayne had it at that point. He called later, left a message. "Don't worry, you don't have to work New years eve... you don't have to work New years. I'll call you when I need you to work".

So Dwayne just took Jason off the schedule.

Jason thought he was kidding for a week or so, until he realized this might be perment.

Jason calls up HR, saying that Dwayne took him off work for refusing to have sex with him.

Naturally, our lawyer and president of company are involved now. They have to take Dwayne out of store temporay. He swears that never happened, and explains what happened. It is found out that Dwayne let him stay at his house. He admits yes. No, nothing happened. It is frowned upon, and he gets in trouble for that being a manager and all.

Then it gets better. Jason claims that Dwayne would touch him during work. So now they have to look through all the tapes. They saw Dwayne touch Jason ONCE, and that was on the shoulder, because he wouldn't get out of Dwayne way to the register.

Jason stories then start getting very strange. He claims there is a dungeon in Dwayne's house where he was tied up at and whipped. Dwayne offered to show home, but they didn't take it up.

Jason stories to lawyers (both ours and his) and president got wierder and wierder. he claimed one thing, then another, then got dates mixed up.

In the end, he was being tied up and buttraped in the cooler by all the customers for a dollar, his mouth was used as a toilet for Dwayne to piss in at any time, that Dwayne would only let him work on days that he was allowed to suck his dick on (which he was fine with for a while because he was like hey, free bj from a gay man!), and just a huge huge list of just really bad gay sex that no-one took him seriously anymore. Case was dropped. He didn't get his million dollars he was looking for, Dwayne got his old store back.

Naturally though, this made Jason pretty pissed up that no-one belived his lies. He spent his time hassling the coworkers, and one of them snapped and shoved him out the door. Again, Jason threatend to sue if they didn't fire that guy. Knowing he was serious, and the fact that coworker did break policy, he was fired sadily.

Never knew what happened after wards. I think Dwayne's Stepson steped in and did something if rumors are true.

[Boozy]

Holy crap, Plaid. That IS an epic story.

[muses_nightmare]

while I do like the idea of using more applied assignments like presentations or projects to be the major part of the grade, there is a point where you have to find some way of seeing whether or not there is an understanding of the core principles, and tests are the best way to do that as of yet.

Depends on your major. Things like graphic design don't really require tests, we do projects because you can't really show your design skills in a written test. Though for a few classes we did have some written tests, but they were more for the history kind of stuff rather than the actual design stuff.