Bragging about tampering with customer food

[ZedOmega]

I just finished reading through the page that OP linked to. I'm seeing a lot of stories about people confessing to food tampering, credit card fraud, poor customer service, poisoning... and these assholes are proud of that? Oh, wah, the customer ordered a blended drink! I'm going to slip laxatives into their drink and laugh as they feel my vengeance! Oh, and the guy who thought it'd be funny to put fruit flies in customers' drinks? If the bar he worked at ended up getting shut down for health violations, I will laugh my ass off.

What. The. Fuck is wrong with these people?

[Mongo Skruddgemire]

I'm seeing a lot of stories about people confessing to food tampering, credit card fraud, poor customer service, poisoning... and these assholes are proud of that?

Yeah, I haven't read that site since 2005 when I first discovered it. When I saw that they were bragging about all the horrific things that they do to customers...I stopped reading it. It's why I read Customers Suck. At least there the posters have nice stories of PWNage that do not involve doing anything harmful or illegal.

I myself prefer to offer to the best service that I can to hose who deserve it. I'll go the extra mile and I'll move heaven and earth to get my good customers what they need and to get their computer back and running. If they're nice about it I had the authority to cut the profits a little bit and give them a break.

But if you were an asshole, I limited my revenge to giving the minimum of service required to make a quality computer repair. I'll not cut any of our pricing and will line-item everything. I'll be polite and civil, but will be very efficient and business-like and not chatty. I'll do the job, do it well, and that's it...nothing more.

Example. Nice customer comes in and asks me to remove a virus. Well consider that virus gone. I'll clean it off the system, defrag the computer, run Registry and Temp-File cleaners, tweak the start-up so only what is needed is running in the background, update the anti-virus files (and if it is one of the free programs, I'll download the latest version), blow out the dust in the case, zip-tie the cables to improve airflow, and give the case a cleaning. At no more charge than the virus removal costs. Our virus removal is a flat-rate charge that is equal to three hours of labor. So if it takes 1.5 hours to remove the virus or it takes 5 hours, it's the same rate. Meaning if the virus clean-up takes 1 hour 30 minutes, I'll spend the next 1.5 hours making that computer run well with some general maintenance.

Now if an asshole comes in with a virus removal...I'll remove the virus and that is it. If it takes me 1.5 hours, I'm done. Nothing more, nothing less. Virus is gone and the rest of the computer maintenance is their own account.

If the bar he worked at ended up getting shut down for health violations, I will laugh my ass off.

As will I.