Is Emily Post Still relveant these days??

[Racket_Man]

article here:
http://www.lemondrop.com/2010/09/24/...tte/5#comments

considering that her original book was orginally published almost 80 years ago.

a version can be found here:
http://www.gutenberg.org/files/14314...-h/14314-h.htm

some things change with the changing "tolerance" of society BUT

as many of the commentors point out
1. this is not the age of the White Male any longer. the 40's and 50's were not all that great if you were NOT a white male

2. some of her "rules" seem to be directed only at upper class persons (again mostly a white male attitude).

3. common courtesy and politeness and respect are something that is still a sign of a well mannered well rounded well balanced "civilized" person.

4 table manners are a good thing to have.

5. women have come unto their own being. they do not need to have a man around to complete them. women can do things for themselves. unfortuneately some women have become as bad as men.

6. clothing -- enough said these days esp with SOMEONE wearing a meat dress (I am surprised that Ozzie was not around to "attack" it.

[Boozy]

The overall ideas behind what Emily Post had to say hold as true now as they ever did.

No, men aren't going to take her advice about wearing suits every time they leave the house. That's outdated fashion. But the idea behind that "rule" is to dress appropriately and with respect for others who will be interacting with you.

I don't understand why the basics of etiquette - think about the comfort of others -- is white-male oriented.

[PepperElf]

although it was rather 2 dimensional ... i liked the movie Blast from the Past
and they had a good definition of manners. "Manners are a way of showing other people we care about them. "

another way to look at it is that manners are a way to make others around you feel comfortable.

there's still a miss manners post each week in the paper. it's a nice read.

[Teysa]

I think she is still relevant. True, some of the specifics such as when to bow or when a man should remove his hat are not really used anymore, but simple courtesy never goes out of style. Saying 'please' and 'thank you' costs nothing.

[Hobbs]

Is it bad that I don't know who Emily Post is? (I recognize the name, just not what she did).

[telecom_goddess]

Is it bad that I don't know who Emily Post is? (I recognize the name, just not what she did).

really?

[Wingates_Hellsing]

Never heard of her before, is this something to do with napkins? or towels?

[Hobbs]

really?

Who's Yamamoto Tsunetomo then?

Yeah, thought so.

[telecom_goddess]

Who's Yamamoto Tsunetomo then?

Yeah, thought so.

First off that is a lot more obscure in America I would think. Secondly I didn't get a chance to add anything before you added your comment.

[AdminAssistant]

Emily Post was basically the original Miss Manners, for anyone still wondering.

I think that she absolutely is still relevant. There are certain things that are, of course, outdated and ridiculous. However, the core of etiquette and good manners is respect for those around you. The next generation (and a good many others as well) could certainly use a lesson or two in politeness. I'm not talking about "yes, ma'am" or "no, sir," but things like waiting patiently, not taking frustrations out on service workers, opening doors for others, paying attention in class instead of fiddling with your GD cellphone, not bragging about knowing random trivia, etc.

Although it is kinda cute whenever a freshman comes up to me with, "Ummm, ma'am?" Hey, I do it with my professors, too. Force of habit.

[Hobbs]

First off that is a lot more obscure in America I would think. Secondly I didn't get a chance to add anything before you added your comment.

You didn't add anything as far as I can see from your comment. It still just says "really???" with those shocked smileys.

Do I seem like the kind of person who reads Miss Manners? THen why expect me to know her? Just as I didn't expect anyone outside of a military strategist or historian to know about *Tsunetomo.

*For anyone that cares, he was an Edo-Period samurai who wrote one of the definitive treatises on samurai etiquette and behavior. After his master died, he became a Buddhist monk.

[McDreidel09]

Although it is kinda cute whenever a freshman comes up to me with, "Ummm, ma'am?" Hey, I do it with my professors, too. Force of habit.

Heh. I do that too! My grandma and my mom (I'm more afraid of what my grandmother says though) would have my hide if I didn't call someone sir or ma'am. However, when I called my advisor "sir", he gave me a stern look over his glasses and says "Please do not call me sir." I almost said "Yes sir"

Or the one time, I was in the weight room, getting my stuff from the hook area and an older guy was kind of in the way, so I said "Excuse me sir." He looked at me with the biggest look of shock on his face and said "Young lady, I never hear such good manners from people your age."

[AdminAssistant]

However, when I called my advisor "sir", he gave me a stern look over his glasses and says "Please do not call me sir." I almost said "Yes sir"

I love the NCIS variant:

"Yes, sir"
"Don't call me sir"
"Yes, ma'am"

[Ladeeda]

Rule of thumb from Miss Manners is you call someone Sir/Ma'am or Mr. X/Ms. Y unless you are invited to call them something else. Using first names on your own choice is presumptuous.

I don't get people who are offended by Sir or, as is more common, Ma'am. It's just a term of respect when you don't know someone's name. I'd much rather be called Ma'am than Sweetie or Dear or Honey or, I dunno, Sugartits.

Besides, that's how Princesses are addressed from day 1.

[Tanasi]

At my kid's school I think between 2nd and 4th grade they have a somewhat mandatory club called The Gentlemen for the boys and The Ladies for the girls. The purpose of these clubs are to teach and reinforce the proper and expected behaviours of Ladies and Gentlemen. During club times they expect to use what they've learned. The good part is the older kids help teach the younger kids. I've seen some kids that were little better than animals transform into very pleasant children. After 4th grade the clubs are combined and then they are taught to dance (ball room type dances), appropriate party behavior, etc.
It's like an ongoing finishing school.

Edit add: Regardless of what you find in a hotel/motel room offensive you shouldn't destroy it because said object isn't yours to destroy. Perhaps treating others people's property as you would like yours treated would be more acceptible behavior.