sex ed

[BlaqueKatt]

Ok-I would like to say a few words to the parents of kids that go to schools that teach "abstinence only" education.

This was done mainly due to a few parents getting upset that schoolswere teaching about OMG-teh ghey sex!!!!eleventy111

Fine in the interest of being fair(and receiving federal funding), most schools only go through the basics-biological processes, how pregnancy occurs etc.

PARENTS-this is your territory, it is not the school's job to parent your children!!!!

I read an article recently(the is some question as to its validity as of late-as no one can find any support to the claims made in it-but that is not relevant to my arguement), that teenagers are supposedly drinking mountain dew to prevent pregnancy, and drinking bleach to prevent AIDS and other STIs. Typical media OMG everyone panic! story.

What gets me is EVERYONE responding to the article(and the article) blamed the school and the abstinence only sex ed the kids are getting.

In my opinion if you as a parent are that "uncomfortable" talking to your kids about sex that you don't say anything-you shouldn't have them-period. Barring that if nothing else take them to the doctor and let the doctor or nurse answer the questions for them, personally I don't agree with this as it's still putting the responsibility of something that could be life-or-death solely on the shoulders of someone who has no connection to the child and no vested interest to keep them safe.


so discuss:
Abstinence only=parents getting more involved, and knowing what their kids are doing(in all aspects of life not just sex)-through open frank discussion.
or
Abstinence only=OMG I shouldn't have to talk to my children about sex-I'm a parent that's not my job it's the school's job!!!!!


And seriously-no "single parents don't have time" arguments-something that important-you make time. I was raised by a single mother-my sister and I were teenagers at the same time, mom worked two full time jobs. By the time we were 14 both of us knew about birth control choices and how to use them effectively and STI's. And the only time we saw her was a few hours on the weekends(usually about 2 hours).

[Greenday]

My school did a good job with health classes. We covered STDs (STIs if you want to be politically correct) and contraception. That was it. Well, in high school anyway. 5th grade we actually had sex ed where you learn about the bodies.

Abstinence only education is a waste of time. Too many parents are too damn lazy to teach their own kids, their too squeamish, or are too stupid. Whether you like it or not, your kids NEED to learn this stuff, whether you like it or not. You can no longer control what they will do, so at least make sure they aren't stupid about it.

[IDrinkaRum]

Whenever the Sex Ed stuff comes up in either discussion or TV or whatever, I'm always reminded of a Happy Days episode.

In this episode, Fonzie is a substitute teacher and the kids ask him about sex ad stuff & he tells them. He gets in trouble because no one is supposed to talk about that in school. The Principal is about to reprimand Fonzie (and the teacher for whom he substituted - Ted McGinley's(sp?) character) because Fonzie came back to the classroom and said his feelings were hurt because they tricked him, and they talked some more about sex, etc. Then, right before the school official could say something, some girl came up to Fonzie & teacher & asked them if a person could get pregnant by kissing a boy while wearing a bathing suit. They laughed & then said no. The girl was so relieved because that's what her mother had told her and she had kissed a boy wearing only a bathing suit & she was absolutely convinced she was pregnant. After that, the official was all gung ho for sex ed in school.

So I say, sex ed must be taught in schools because there are a bunch of idiot parents out there who don't know/want to talk sex to their kids and so they give out misinformation.

[BlaqueKatt]

Too many parents are too damn lazy to teach their own kids, their too squeamish, or are too stupid.

that is the entire point-since when did it become to government's job to parent children. Make the parents accountable somehow-I don't know-kids have to pass a test on sex myths vs. reality-kids doesn't pass parents get a fine or something, maybe a parenting class?

Personally I barely trust the government to deliver mail-much less teach a kid about proper use of condoms(and they only teach condom use if they teach any kind of barrier-so we had many males in my school with throat/mouth STIs-no clue what dental dams were).

And the state where this "news story" is from is a state where the parents are protesting a uniform dress code(khaki pants/polo shirts for everyone)-because OMG the gubmint is trin' to parent my young'uns.

so-ok for government to teach kids how to prevent STI's and pregnancy
Not ok-same government telling kids what to wear(so maybe they don't end up with STI's/pregnant)


The message I'm getting is "Don't tell my kids how to dress, but tell them about sex/birth control/STI prevention, since I'm not going to anything to parent my child after birthing them, except biatch about how the government keeps trying to parent my kids when I won't."

[AFPheonix]

On the other hand, it's kind of a public health matter, so it IS important for the state to teach basic sex hygiene. A lot of families as we know won't touch the subject either because they don't want to acknowledge that their children are or will be sexual beings, or because of religion or crappy parenting or what have you. So, I think a run down on what happens where and how, and what potential consequences are and what's available to counteract those consequences should be taught in school along with other health matters.

But despite abstinence-only peeps, teenagers seem to be figuring it out as teenage birthrates and abortions are going down. Yay for Doctor Drew, I guess.

[anriana]

"Schools should butt out and let parents teach their kids" is an incredibly privileged view. SHOULD parents teach their kids about sex ed? Possibly. Would they do a good job at it? Most likely not. Some people are lucky enough to have parents who would teach them accurate information on sexuality. Not everyone does - isn't the point of public school to have trained professionals teach children subjects their parents aren't qualified to teach? I certainly wouldn't want my parents teaching me sex ed. I doubt they know anything remotely accurate about STDs or contraception or oral sex - that's why my talk was "I bought you a book about sex. I think you're old enough to read it now. If you have any questions... um... there might be some references in the back" and I know I got a much better deal than most of my classmates based on some of the completely stupid things I heard them say about sex. Perhaps my school wouldn't have had so many teenage pregnancies if we had had sex ed classes to dispel the notions that you can't get pregnant during your period and "pulling out" is a highly effective contraceptive.

Blaquekatt - you are LUCKY you had a parent who took the time to teach you about birth control and VDs. Did she teach you about every type of contraceptive or just pills and condoms? Did she teach you about the side effects of the pill? How about male and female anatomy? Did she teach you how to chart your period? What did she tell you about breast/uterine cancer? And did she teach you about mathematics or did she send you to school for that? What about social sciences? Literature?

[Lace Neil Singer]

The sex ed I got was crap. The ancient science teacher muttered a few words about "You should wait til marriage" and "Boys know when you're not a virgin", gave us some condoms and bananas, made us watch the periods video that we'd all seen at primary school, and that was it.

My parents gave me a book at age 11 about sex which was very good; plus I learned a lot by reading Just Seventeen, Sugar and Bliss; the last two were slammed in the papers for having their sealed sex sections, but they were very informative and were not encouraging kids to have sex, just giving them all the options and letting them make up their own minds.

There should at least be the basics covered in school, with not just the physical but also emotional aspects covered, with maybe a week spent lugging round a child sized doll so that some of the girls realise a bit of the work that goes into having a baby.

[Boozy]

Parents should teach their kids about sex. But many don't. That is a fact and will probably always be true, so it's useless to sit here and wish it were otherwise.

So here are the options we are left with:

1) Schools don't teach sex ed, because it "should" be the parent's responsibility. Teen pregnancy and STI rates skyrocket, and society pays the price.

2) We try to pass a law that coerces parents into fulfilling their responsibility to teach their children about sex. The Supreme Court rightfully shoots it down as an unconstitutional infringement by the government into the homes and families of private citizens.

3) Schools teach sex ed. We keep teen pregnancy and STI rates under control, and all of society benefits.

The only reasonable option is #3.

[rahmota]

Well yet again Boozy beats me to the good points. I'll agree that #3 is the only reasonable and rational answer. Not every one has as good a parents as I did who sat me down when I was like 12 and told me everything I ever wanted to know about sex, stds, pregnancy and girls. Things I really wasnt wanting to know and didnt wind up putting to practical useage for several years.

[tropicsgoddess]

Sex ed may be an awkward topic for the parents to discuss, but it's something they MUST discuss with their children to teach them about sex and the consequences of not using protection. When I was in my junior year of high school (11th grade), I took Human Anatomy and Physiology, and when we got to the unit on the reproductive system, he told us about not only the reproductive system, pregnancy and childbirth but also the different types of STD's and methods of contraception. Long before that when I was a kid my mom started teaching me about sex ed at a young age since my aunt and grandmother began their first menstruation at an early age (8 years old ) and were in the dark about it since they didn't really have female relatives to teach them and my and she didn't want that happening to me. You can't keep a somebody from wanting to have sex, but you can teach them how to protect themselves from venereal diseases and unwanted pregnancies if and when they choose to have sex one day. The schools can only teach (especially these days with all the politically correctness), but it's ultimately the parent's job to teach their son/daughter(s) about sex education. Lace Neil Singer had a good point with those dolls, but what I think would really make it sink in as well is the belly. Have the teens lug the belly around for a few days then for a week have them carry around the baby doll. That should really sink into their brains what pregnancy is like (sans hormones) and the responsibilities of parenthood.

[Shangri-laschild]

While I think parents should be the ones to teach their kids, it often doesn't work like that. If the school teaches it, and does a good job of it then it doesn't really hurt anything. Just the "not before marriage" talk by itself isn't enough. My mom really believes in waiting before marriage but that doesn't mean she didn't discuss other things.

If the kids get it from home and school what does it hurt? At least if it's taught well in schools then it's helpful for the kids who don't have parents who are willing to talk about it. And as far as the dolls, I know that not only did the teachers hate those, but some of the girls at school thought they were amusing and cute and it didn't really teach them anything. Hopefully for some it works. It really depends on the person and the more education the better.

[Wicked_Lexi]

As an Australian I find abstinence only education completely baffling... In Australia by LAW all schools regardless of religion etc must teach the basics about sex and how to prevent pregnancy and STI's.

Religious schools are free to say in these lessons "As a Christian/Muslim/etc our religion teaches that Abstinence before marriage is the right thing to do... however these other methods will also work"

I went to a Catholic school and they took a very pragmatic approach. They taught us the facts including Teen pregnancy stats, STI stats etc. They pointed out the only 100% sure fire way to NEVER EVER get pregnant was not to have sex but they didn't expect that every girl in the school was going to be a good catholic girl!

I was luckily in that I could also go to my mum and ask her anything and she would tell me the answer! However a lot of my friends didn't have that option with their parents and had they not had the education at school they would of known nothing except what their parent told them which was "sex is bad... don't do it... til your married OK!"

Should parents talk their kids? Yes! Should it be the schools job to educate kids about the risks involved in sex etc? NO! But I live in reality and the reality is kids and teens need this information and if they don't get it BAD things happen... I think the comic linked says all the stuff I cant seem to couch into words !

[Slytovhand]

I'm thinking... as harsh as it will sound.. that if the parent isn't willing to take the full responsibility of raising a human being in society, then they shouldn't be allowed to be a parent.

Naturally, part of that includes sex ed.

But... having said that... having the most accurate and correct information is vital, and something parents may not have the hands readily available to get...so the school has its role to play there.

So...both.

Slyt