41 year old teacher quits job, leaves wife and kids...

[Lace Neil Singer]

During the time when I was briefly split from my fiance, I had a seventeen year old ask me out. I turned him down, cuz I could see we would have nothing in common and to put it bluntly, it was obvious he wanted a relationship whereas all I wanted was a quick fling. If I had gone with him, it would have ended in heartbreak.

This particular case is not about agism, it's about an older man taking advantage of a naive girl who recently lost her father and was once his student. It's doomed to disaster; at best, she'll drop him in a few months. He's not following his heart; he's following his dick and taking advantage of a girl who's obviously got issues about losing her father and is latching on to the next best thing.

My fiance is six years older than me. However, we got together at the right time, when we were both adults. Had I started dating him when I was fifteen and he was twenty one, I doubt it would have worked out.

[Greenday]

It just blows my mind that because the girl in the separate case was 17 and not 18, there is suddenly this huge difference that means this guy should be in jail and marked as a sex offender like violent rapists are.

And it ended because she wanted to, not him. She screwed herself over, not the guy.

[BlaqueKatt]

But that's not what we're talking about with this case. We're talking about a relationship where one person has less power, less relationship experience and no life experience in a relationship with someone whose already middle aged and has a very different perspective and all the experience.
<snip>The idea that this is some amazing romantic meeting of soul mates is so incredibly unlikely as to be laughable.

expect it more, as the twihards come of age-the twilight books put power imbalanced, abusive, age gap relationships on a pedestal. And the girls and their mothers in many cases are lapping it up as "the ultimate love story"

[Andara Bledin]

Even with that, there's a good chance that like me and my high school sweetheart, you'll turn into two completely different people over the next 2-3 years of real life. People who are not compadible.

That's what happened to me and my ex. We were inseparable for about three years, and we met when we were both adults. By the time we'd hit our mid-20's however, we'd grown so incompatible as partners that we chose to officially go our separate ways.

And it ended because she wanted to, not him. She screwed herself over, not the guy.

She ended it because he lied to her about the previous encounter. He did the screwing (possibly even literally); she's just protecting her own interests.

^-.-^

[Greenday]

She ended it because he lied to her about the previous encounter. He did the screwing (possibly even literally); she's just protecting her own interests.

What did he lie about? He told her what had happened already.

[Andara Bledin]

Did you not even read the article, or are you purposefully ignoring what it said?

“He hung out with her just as friends and then he went to her house and she came out of the bathroom naked and he only touched her boobs and her legs," Powers said. "He was freaked out so he left and went home. He said nothing else happened, but all of that was a lie."

and

After being booked Friday on one count of oral copulation with a minor, Hooker made a brief court appearance where a judge entered a not guilty plea on his behalf.

He said all he did was touch the girl, and the girl claims there was oral sex.

^-.-^

[Greenday]

Did you not even read the article, or are you purposefully ignoring what it said?


and


He said all he did was touch the girl, and the girl claims there was oral sex.

^-.-^

Yea and he pled guilty to get the charges down instead of going through the lengthy mess of fighting it.

[Lace Neil Singer]

What kind of man would prefer to admit to molestation charges rather than prove himself innocent, if he is innocent?

If he is guilty, and there's proof against him... then, pleading guilty would be a good means of hopefully ensuring that he doesn't get the book thrown at him.

[Greenday]

What kind of man would prefer to admit to molestation charges rather than prove himself innocent, if he is innocent?

If he is guilty, and there's proof against him... then, pleading guilty would be a good means of hopefully ensuring that he doesn't get the book thrown at him.

Hm, go to court in a system biased against men in any and all rape/molestation cases, especially when he is now famous and the media has already made him a evil person, and most likely end up in jail for years. Or just plead guilty, not have to go through the entire hassle, and get a lesser sentence.

Gee that's a tough one.

[Gravekeeper]

Hm, go to court in a system biased against men in any and all rape/molestation cases, especially when he is now famous and the media has already made him a evil person, and most likely end up in jail for years. Or just plead guilty, not have to go through the entire hassle, and get a lesser sentence.

Pretty much, the US media would destroy him. It wouldn't matter whatsoever if he was proven innocent. He would forever be a sex offender to the public. All it takes is the accusation in the US. If you have a penis anyway. If you don't, its laughed off as a joke.

Sad as it is, his reputation would suffer less pleading guilty to a lesser charge then it would being proven innocent over a lengthy trial.

[Greenday]

Maybe he did do more, maybe he didn't. We'll never know.

[Nyoibo]

What kind of man would prefer to admit to molestation charges rather than prove himself innocent, if he is innocent?

A man accused of a sex offence, if it kept him off the registry, if it kept it out of the public domain, a man accused of a sex crime is screwed, innocent or not he's still going to be guilty of having a penis, which means he must be guilty and when it comes down to "he said, she said" the man's almost lways found guilty unless there's physical evidence to counter it.

[siead_lietrathua]

i want to play a little bit of devils advocate about girls in age-bias relationships. just a bit drawn up from my own life-experiences and whatnots so not to be taken as the rule.
when i was in highschool, girls in 9th grade to 13th would blatantly hit on one of the male teachers. (science, he also had a second job modeling). he would get blatantly hit on in the halls, classroom, wherever. why am i pointing this out? girls can be just as digging on older men as a boy their age. are they smart enough to bone either? probably not. but as much as teens want to and do bone people their own age, they probably would go after higher age levels. i know that makes it up to the adult to behave, but that goes into the second point.
not all age-gap relationships are based on daddy issues or run by control freaks. i've been in relationships with men 15-18 years older than myself. i'm a dad-issue-free person, unless getting along with parents makes me issued lol. the older men i've been with/ am with were never controlling or a douche except to the end of the relationships. actually, the older men i have been with have been LESS controlling or jerky than the ones closer to my age group i have been with. i also found the older men to be more honest and caring. for another example, one of my dear friends was engaged to a man over 20 years her senior befor her passing. they were the most loving, caring, deeply-into-eachother people i have ever seen. i know if she was still around, they would still be together.
which kinda slides into the third thing i want to tackle. not all relationships that start with young partners end badly. my parents were married at 18, still together. my inlaws were married when my mother in law was 17 and my father in law was well into his 30s. they are still together. i've been with my primary partner since we were 17/18, so going on near a decade. grandparents all married before 20, all together to the till-death line.
not all young-starting relationships are instantly doomed to failure. it depends on the willingness of the people involved to work through their problems together.
and please no turning that last line into a strawman on abuse. abusive relationships should of course end.

[draco664]

Maybe he did do more, maybe he didn't. We'll never know.

Personally, I'd say it's far more likely his version of events was true than the other.

If not, then you'd have to believe that the prosecutors in the first case allowed him to plead down to a lesser charge and yet still allow him to teach children. I just can't see that.

And I'll join you having my mind blown at the supposed difference in the ages of the girls in the two cases.

[Gravekeeper]

annnnnnnd she broke up with him and is now wallowing in horrible regret.

Surprise, surprise.