Leaving kids to play at a park = child endangerment?

[Rageaholic]

I'm a little torn, but this did sound like a pretty dumb move on daddy's part. It's not so much stranger danger as it is leaving the kids to fend for themselves away from home. A lot can happen in two hours (what if it starts to storm?).

It's hard to tell the whole story and the police was overkill, but this just seemed careless.

[DrFaroohk]

Several hours with no checking seems to be a bit negligent. My kids are 8 and 3, and they play outside a lot. I don't hover right over them, and they're not in my sight every second, but I'm frequently checking on them every 2-3 minutes.

No reason to let it go on that long.

Although, sometimes I worry that maybe the neighbors don't see me checking on the kids from the bathroom window or something. To me, I'm checking the kids every few minutes. To the neighbors, they're left unattended for hours at a time. I know I'd be pissed because some nosy shit disturbing neighbor called the cops on me for that.

[Beckpatton]

I think it very much depends on the child/children in question, and where exactly they have been left alone.

I think 9-10 is ok to leave them at the park alone, providing it's somewhere they are familiar with, and they are able to reach a parent or guardian in an emergency. Especially if it's your local park at the end of your street or something. Not driving them somewhere and dropping them off.

My fear is not kidnappers or pedophiles, but injury. If I feel the child is mature enough to calmly go for help if he or his friend/sibling is hurt, then fine, play away. But if I think they would just panic and fall into a crying mess, then no.

If they're not ready, they shouldn't have that responsibility put on them. Same as having to care for a younger sibling. I think 9 is too young to be in charge of a 6 year old, but then I don't know THIS 9 & 6 year old. They might be mature enough to look out for each other, and were probably fine. When I was 9 and my brother 6, I probably would have looked out for him. But I couldn't control him, he wouldn't have listened to me. If we'd been put in this situation and he wanted to run off someplace else, I couldn't stop him. Not without a full on fight!

I think actually charging this man with child endangerment is a bit severe, I'm sure a warning would suffice.

[Lace Neil Singer]

Depends on the child, and the situation; ie, was this a regular thing, and the kids were cool with playing by themselves for a few hours while waiting for daddy?

Regarding the "you can't leave kids in a park alone, what if they get abducted?" question; well, there has been cases where the kids were abducted from their own back gardens. So I guess, in order to keep kids safe from the dreaded Pedobear, you ought to lock them in their rooms forever and never let them out. [/sarcasm]

The whole "Stranger Danger" meme is overblown. The vast majority of abductions are by family members, and the majority of the remaining cases are by friends.

^-.-^

^ Fact.

[crashhelmet]

It's one thing if he left them there for 9 hours while he went and worked his 8 hour shift. Or if he left them there to go to a local bar, watch a game, and toss back a few beers.

He let children that were old enough to play on their own have fun while he ran errands. Although, I'm not really sure why he had to goto the gym to shower. but that's neither here nor there. As it stands, this isn't endangerment.

[Nekojin]

I'm of two minds on this, but on balance, I'm on the "not as big of a deal as people are making it" side of the fence.

Is leaving the kids alone at the park a problem? That depends. Is the park within the kids' known "territory"? Could they walk home from the park, if necessary? If so, this is an utter non-issue. If it's somewhere far away from their home, it becomes a somewhat larger problem, but this isn't a "child-abuse level" of problem - there's no need for Child Endangerment charges or Child Protection Services involvement.

This wasn't the wisest of choices by the father, but parents make unwise choices all the time - most parents are still relatively immature themselves. If you thought about it, I'm sure every person on this board could look back and pick out a few instances where your parents did something relatively dumb with your safety (in hindsight). And yet, we all turned out more-or-less OK.

[Andara Bledin]

Although, I'm not really sure why he had to goto the gym to shower. but that's neither here nor there. As it stands, this isn't endangerment.

He says that he had been playing tennis at the part, and so showered at the gym while running the errands. It has a certain logic to it.

Is leaving the kids alone at the park a problem? That depends. Is the park within the kids' known "territory"? Could they walk home from the park, if necessary?

Based on his choice to shower someplace not at home, I suspect that they weren't really close to there.

As for the time he was gone, he had no idea how long he'd been out (which shows he's a bit lacking in the responsibility department) but thought it had only been about 45 minutes, not 2 hours.

^-.-^

[anakhouri]

There is park near our house we can walk to. By the time my son is 8 or so, I think I will be comfortable letting him go there alone to play as long as he goes with friends. We live in a very small town and there are numerous places within walking distance, and many people recognize us on sight.

9 might be ok but I don't think it is acceptable to make a 9-year-old be responsible for a 6-year-old for that amount if time. I would leave those kids AT HOME alone for an hour max, not in a public place. Sure you might have taught your kids every safety precaution in the book but that's no guarantee they'll remember them at the exact moment they need to. And I don't just mean strangers; one kid could chase a ball into a street and be hit by a car. When I was 9 my brother was 7 and I know I could not force him to do things when I was in charge as he was very large and stronger than me, and even threatening him with mom's wrath didn't always work.

I know 'stranger danger' is overblown but lurking in the back of a parents' mind there is always the thought of the possibility of something like that happening. Even allowing myself to begin thinking about someone taking Khan makes me physically ill (or really thinking of anything bad happening to him, hit by a car or getting very sick also), so while I agree people need to chill, I can also understand their fear. You just can't let it rule you.

[BlaqueKatt]

well, there has been cases where the kids were abducted from their own back gardens. So I guess, in order to keep kids safe from the dreaded Pedobear, you ought to lock them in their rooms forever and never let them out. [/sarcasm]

but there have been kids abducted from their own beds, in their own houses, best to chain them to you at all times....

[blas87]

But pedo bear has CANDY, and for girls my age, he even has Manola Blahnek shoes!

Joking aside, would it be considered "wrong" nowdays if a 11-12 year old oldest child was responsible for babysitting their 8-9 year old sibling after school for a few hours some days until one of the parents came home?

Because I was expected to do that on days my dad worked 10-6 or if my mom had to work both jobs the same day. And, because I'd known from an early age how to use a stove, use the sink, boil water, etc, I could make mac and cheese or whatever basic stuff, not burn the house down, and keep my brother entertained and safe.

[anakhouri]

I did the same thing at the same age, blas. Kids can change a LOT in a single year. When it comes to ages, 11-12 is light years different from 9. We were also at home though, not in an open environment.

Even then I couldn't stop my brother from running outside to play even if mom specifically forbade him not to (my brother had some anger issues, probably stemming from our parents' divorce. He used to pick vicious physical fights with me; he punched a hole in the wall at the age of 10 and broke the door of my room after I locked myself in to get away from him).

[blas87]

At that age, I was still beating his little butt if he dared defy me. LOL.

We are pretty good friends now, and I'd never chance anything with him now that he's nearly a foot taller than me and has nearly 100 lbs on me.

[protege]

...Well I did frankly and I was 6. Long as I told my mom where I was and came back by dinner. The park was but one possible destination.

That's the way it was here too. As long as my mom knew that I was next door or across the street playing, or even down at the playground down the street, I was free to go pretty much wherever...as long as I came home for dinner.

Nothing has changed except the hysteria level.

Same here too. I remember some years back, when my mom screamed at me to pick up my brother from a friend's house...a whopping 2 blocks away. I couldn't see the point of wasting time/gas doing that. When I asked her, she screamed about how "the neighborhood has changed since you were little and something bad could happen."

Seriously? You let me go wherever when I was his age, and *now* you think something "bad" could happen? I could understand if he was at a friend's across town, but 2 blocks? Are you fucking kidding me? Mom, you wonder why I think my brother is a pussy. Things like this are *exactly* why.

Again, the neighborhood hasn't changed at all. All that's changed, is the "protect the children" attitude fostered by the news media and their sensationalizing. Think about it--when I was younger, nobody worried about their kids being abducted. I'm sure it went on, but it didn't make national news. Nor were such things in every report every night.

[siead_lietrathua]

i get very sick of the over-paranioa about kids, thou it does seem to be worse in suburbia than the city or the rural. heck out here kids sit with their parents on tractors while still in diapers and we were working at 6! lol. city kids seem to have more freedom from the few times i've been there. roaming about in packs for safety . but all hell, i can drive around the suburbia near here and not see a sign of the kids/teens/anything.

[Evandril]

One change I know I've seen from when I grew up...People today don't want to get involved. If I was at the park playing, and hurt myself, any of the adults there would have been trying to help (Ok, most, not any), where today, 'tis far less likely. If the kids had a cell phone with them, and the father was making sure to always have his within hearing, it'd not be quite so bad...but like people said, accidents happen, and I know I'd feel like shit if my kids hurt themselves simply because I wasn't around to tell them to stay off the top of the swings.