Sexual Harassment/Discrimination?

[Scottya21]

So being male and working with ALL female coworkers is kind of interesting. The girls can converse freely about sex and such topics, but I naturally feel that if I commented similarly, everyone would think I'm a masochistic pig.

A good story: my manager got breast reduction surgery, and came in to the store a little later. All the girls greet her, they're all talking, I figure I'll just stay out of it ( for the obvious reasons). At one point, she opens her jacket, and everyone ooos and ahhs. She was still wearing a shirt and whatever... Naturally I glance over ( your eye is just drawn to the subject of conversation!) and am immediately told not to look. I mean, come on! For one, you're still fully covered, so we're not seeing anything anyway! for two, if everyone ELSE can comment, what about me? Third, it's certainly not like I'm getting pleasure from their discussion of moving nipples around and such. *blech*

So, discuss! Am I just being paranoid, and if I am , what does that say about the way popular culture is? And why can't I ogle my manager's breasts!?? :-p

[rahmota]

Well that depends on how they said it. And how you and they interact. Since she got a BR she had probably been used to being "oogled" by men quite often and maybe had some self-appearance issues that at that moment hit. I dunno. When being the only gender in a shop of the opposite gender that can be like tap dancing across a minefield in stilletos. I fortunately have never been in your position as the exclusive guy but I have been in a few where we have been outnumbered. It all depends on how "safe" a guy you are and how relaxed they are around guys.

It doesnt seem like any large scale assumptions can be made as to the type of female based on age, religion, ethnic background etc.. as to how they will react. A lot of it is how they have been treated by the universe. As I've had female coworkers be so uptight as not to even mention farting and others like my old supervisor at the detail shop who flashed me girls gone wild style when we was joking around one day. To another coworker who had her favorite males she would joke/flirt with and everyone else was a potential rapitst disgusting pig.

IN the detail shop we had 1 female to the 5 males of us. Fortunately she was in many ways one of the guys so there wasn't much taboo or taken seriously.

That being said being a man is a dangerous thing in society today. One wrong move or comment and your career can be quite over. Part of the special benefits of being politically correct.

[Scottya21]

That being said being a man is a dangerous thing in society today. One wrong move or comment and your career can be quite over. Part of the special benefits of being politically correct.

*THAT* is the part that bothers me. I do everything I can to be "safe". I like women being comfortable with me. I like being friends, I like flirting (if it's not going anywhere, mostly), etc. But the perception I have is that if I participate in this, I'm totally open to legal action. The onus is ENTIRELY on the girls as to what they feel is appropriate. Whether my perception is faulty is an issue, but I think it's somewhat representative.

And I swear , there's some of them whom intentionally are flirty because it's apparent I get nervous about not really being able to interact with them that way. ^^; But yeah.

[rahmota]

Sad to say my man, but thats just the way the world works. Sometimes you get a batch that enjoy tormenting men in those situations knowing you cant bite back. Sort of like a cat that stays just outside a chained dogs reach.

All i can either say is ignore it and dont rise to the bait eventually they'll get bored enough and leave you alone or they'll change the way they treat you (or they'll thnk you're homosexual and not worry about you anymore as a heteromale threat to their womenhood)

This is not to say that all women are like this just there are quite a few who can be.