Facebook Suicide Might Lead to Lawsuit.

[Rageaholic]

Link

To summarize, this girl had pics posted on facebook which lead to her being harassed online and eventually IRL. She reported the harassing messages to facebook, but they did nothing. The harassment and bullying continued until she took her own life. Because facebook wouldn't react, they might face prosecution.

I'm a bit torn on this. On one hand, facebook was sucky for not doing anything, but on the other hand, they aren't the ones who bullied her (that lies with her douchebag ex BF). I think that's where the real suck lies, not facebook. Still pretty sad though.

[Andara Bledin]

I must ask: Did anyone think to tell these people's parents about what they were doing?

Considering that her bullies were using multiple different platforms, with one method used to send 2.6 thousand messages to her in a single day, going after Facebook seems a bit pointless.

Going after the messengers, as it were, will only make the bullies change tactics. If you really want to stop bullying, then start going after the bullies and make it clear that such actions will not be tolerated. Ever.

[anakhouri]

I don't see how removing the offensive messages would have stopped her killing herself- she'd already received and read them, unfortunately, and was unlikely to forget them. Why didn't her family, which obviously knew about this, go to the police, or the school, or even pressure her to close her Facebook account and messaging app? If the bullying spilled over into school, the school should have been notified. If the taunts threatened violence, there might have been legal recourse (but I'm not sure how Italian police work as opposed to American ones). I feel like everyone failed this girl, not just the bullies.

[Nekojin]

Why didn't her family, which obviously knew about this, go to the police, or the school, or even pressure her to close her Facebook account and messaging app?

Maybe I'm overreacting to this, but the idea of pressuring her to change her life (and potentially cut off one of her avenues of social interaction with her friends) is really abhorrent. It would be sending a (probably unintentional) message that she's the one that needs to change, not the bullies.

[siead_lietrathua]

Maybe I'm overreacting to this, but the idea of pressuring her to change her life (and potentially cut off one of her avenues of social interaction with her friends) is really abhorrent. It would be sending a (probably unintentional) message that she's the one that needs to change, not the bullies.

yes and no. deactivating or privating your FB is not as much changing yourself as it is protecting yourself.
it's the same as changing a phone number or moving to get away from a bully or abuser. yes it sucks, but it's not about blaming the victim as much as protecting them.

to me, facebook is not at any fault for what happened, no more than a landlord is at fault for tenants bickering. it's the bullies fault. go sue them.

[Nekojin]

yes and no. deactivating or privating your FB is not as much changing yourself as it is protecting yourself.
it's the same as changing a phone number or moving to get away from a bully or abuser. yes it sucks, but it's not about blaming the victim as much as protecting them.

Agreed, but there's a nontrivial difference between offering advice, and pressuring someone to do something.

to me, facebook is not at any fault for what happened, no more than a landlord is at fault for tenants bickering. it's the bullies fault. go sue them.

Agreed.

[bara]

If you really want to stop bullying, then start going after the bullies and make it clear that such actions will not be tolerated. Ever.

I am in 100% agreement with you. Its the bullies that need the message that they are the ones that are wrong.

[siead_lietrathua]

Agreed, but there's a nontrivial difference between offering advice, and pressuring someone to do something.

i understand. but if it were my kid, it wouldn't be advice, pressure, or even a request. if people were bullying my kid online enough to make them self-harming, i would block facebook on the computer after making them shut down their account. there are other ways to socialize and when the shit died down they could have their account back.

bullies feed on response. no response and they give up or find a new target.

[anakhouri]

That's pretty much what I meant; I guess 'pressure' was a bad word to use. If my child was being bullied to this extent, I would force her to change the privacy settings on her page. I get wanting your kid to be independent and have freedom, but a 14-year-old CHILD is not capable of the sort of rational thinking needed in this emotionally charged situation.

[Duelist925]

i understand. but if it were my kid, it wouldn't be advice, pressure, or even a request. if people were bullying my kid online enough to make them self-harming, i would block facebook on the computer after making them shut down their account. there are other ways to socialize and when the shit died down they could have their account back.

bullies feed on response. no response and they give up or find a new target.

Or they escalate issues until they get a response, or it gets out of hand.

I've seen that bandied about a bit, and the "if you ignore them, they'll go away" thing doesn't work nearly as often as presented.

If one avenue is blocked, they're just as likely to find another avenue to exploit as to move on--more so, if they know they can provoke a reaction from a chosen target.

[s_stabeler]

Or they escalate issues until they get a response, or it gets out of hand.

I've seen that bandied about a bit, and the "if you ignore them, they'll go away" thing doesn't work nearly as often as presented.

If one avenue is blocked, they're just as likely to find another avenue to exploit as to move on--more so, if they know they can provoke a reaction from a chosen target.

or they ramp up the blocked avenue until it's physically impossible to ignore them. ( for example, I used to read a book during breaks at school so I could ignore bullies. They started stealing the book. Telling someone that is bullied to ignore the bullies just encourages the bullies. Certainly not when the bullies aren't punished.