White woman sues for accidentally being impregnated with black man's sperm

[Giggle Goose]

http://www.slate.com/articles/news_a...cial_baby.html

Not sure if this has been posted here yet. She does has a legitimate gripe in not receiving the product that she paid for (sperm from a Caucasian man). According to the article, the clinic refunded her the price of the sperm.

The plaintiff, Jennifer Cramblett, didn’t learn of the error until well along in her pregnancy—a pregnancy that resulted in a healthy, biracial daughter, Payton, who is now 2 years old.

It's unclear if she was too far along to abort, and perhaps she doesn't believe in abortion. If she was committed to giving birth anyway, surely she could have chosen adoption? I think it's a far better option than suing due to the "emotional distress" of having to drive to black neighborhoods in order to get her child's hair done (I'm not making this up). It just boggles my mind that she would wait until her daughter is 2, when she is starting to get old enough that this case could affect her emotional well-being.

[Kheldarson]

Well, from my understanding, the case is about the daughter's emotional well-being. It's not just her hair that's an issue; her moms feel that their community is too racially insensitive that they have to move to a more inclusive area. So this is a hardship that was brought on by the sperm bank's negligence.

I think it's a bit ridiculous and another site has pointed out the cruelty of this suit. I kinda get it, and our law sucks around this issue, but this won't be fun for moms to explain later.

[TheHuckster]

It just boggles my mind that she would wait until her daughter is 2, when she is starting to get old enough that this case could affect her emotional well-being.

It's probably because it took her two years just to find a lawyer who would hear her case.

What I find interesting is, if she is so worried about her neighbors' views on race, does that also affect her choices in relationships and friends? I couldn't imagine saying to someone, "You're great and all, and I'm not racist, really I'm not, but my neighbors and uncle are, so I don't think this can really work out."

I just get this feeling the whole racist community bit of her case is a thin veil over her own racism. I'm sure her lawyer coached her on that, saying if she put the blame on the people around her instead of her own views, it would sound better in court.

[Greenday]

So, her family and the locals are totally racist, but they don't have any problem with her being a lesbian?

Right...

[Gravekeeper]

She has a legitimate complaint but her story about her community is rather aggravating. Since it indicates that had her child been white she would have been perfectly okay with them growing up in a close minded, racist environment. So she would have been okay with her own child absorbing these things in the community had her child been white. That is, of course, if the community is indeed as horrific as she makes it out to be.

She also laments about how she will have to find ways to teach her child about black culture. So her daughter can't just be her daughter, she HAS to be her black daughter.

The lawsuit says she found out about the child's race at 5 month's pregnant. So abortion was out of the picture. But adoption was most certainly on the table. Yet that didn't come up despite her claimed fear, anger and depression.

And yes, this lawsuit is exceedingly cruel to the child as it will forever be attached to her name on the internet.

[D_Yeti_Esquire]

Keep in mind that a lot of racism is self directed. That is, a lot of people believe themselves to be not racist and yet become extremely self-conscious about questions of race. For example surveys where they'll answer questions where they indicate no judgement towards race, yet they believe people around them are not.

How that can also work is a white or black person that moves into or is surrounded by people of a different race. Suddenly, they feel very on edge not because they think less of the people they're surrounded by and not because those people are doing anything, but because in their mind they can't imagine that those people are not in some way thinking about them being the odd race out.

You can watch that play out in something like a subway where often people still group themselves if they can. And that's in the north where people make fun of the south for being horrible racists.

So for this parent, she could be projecting like fuck all over everyone and that projection is being confirmed by a small subset of the population she lives with that does say insensitive things. Those people confirm her inner feelings. Worse, she's probably warping her child's self image in the process.

Regarding teaching her child black culture - this is just me now, but honestly I think people exascerbate the fuck out of the racial tensions that do exist by shit like this and it isn't white people, it's everybody. It's the reason mixed race children often complain about both sides not feeling that they are <insert race here> enough and therefore less than everyone. I've been around specifically black men most of my adult life often as my closest friends and coworkers. There is no orthodoxy in what white and black people do or what their experience should be. The idea that there is mostly serves to keep them apart as yet another facet of "othering".

[siead_lietrathua]

er, race mixup or not, they have every reason to sue this shit-storm of a clinic. they ended up with a child that did not have the genetic traits they were expecting. race, hair colour, whatever reason they picked the donor, it was not who they got. they got a spin of a russian roulette gun.

think about it this way, if you know you have a recessive gene for, say, illness#4. and you carefully pick a donor that doesn't have those genes. but the clinic fucks it up and you end up with a donor chock-full of those genes. so now baby is born with illness#4. all because the clinic can't WRITE A GODDAMN NUMBER.

the scary thing is, what if the wrong donor was still white. then the sperm bank would have gotten away with their mistake, and never have had to cop to it. hell the only reason they found out ahead of time was because they wanted to re-order the same donor. and got hung up on by the receptionist when the mistake was found out. if they never wanted to re-order, they wouldn't have known till the kid popped out. then boom, wrong baby.

and so what if the kid gets older and sees this suit? by the time the kid is old enough to understand what it even means, the parents can explain it to them. "the doctors that helped mommy get pregnant didn't follow all their procedures. i wanted to make sure they didn't keep breaking the rules, so i sued them. this is what the type of suit is called when it deals with this type of clinic."

[Gravekeeper]

and got hung up on by the receptionist when the mistake was found out.

The receptionist didn't just hang up on her out of the blue.

"the doctors that helped mommy get pregnant didn't follow all their procedures. i wanted to make sure they didn't keep breaking the rules, so i sued them. this is what the type of suit is called when it deals with this type of clinic."

Er, no, that's not it at all.

This woman is suing for wrongful birth. Which means she must legally establish that she has suffered harm and economic damage as a result of the clinic's negligence. What it's saying is, and I quote directly from the court documents: "Mommy suffered personal injuries, medical expense, pain, suffering, emotional distress, and other economic and non-economic losses, and will do so in the future." because you aren't what we wanted and only at least 50 grand will sooth our poor white souls.

That said she's probably SOL here. Wrongful birth is specifically for cases where the child would have had serious genetic or congenital issues which the parents were not informed of by their doctor. You can't use it just because you don't like the end result. Furthermore the damages in a case of wrongful birth are typically awarded based on the economic costs involved in the ongoing treatment of said issues the child has. Being half black is not a congenital defect.

The other part of her lawsuit, breach of warranty, is applicable and is what you are describing. If she were just suing for breach of warranty it would not be a problem as that is a legitimate description of what occurred here. But wrongful birth? No.

[Jaden]

All I'm going to add to this discussion is that I feel horrible for the child when she's grown up enough to comprehend the fact that her parents sued the sperm donor because she was born the wrong color. The poor kid is most likely going to have some serious emotional issues simply due to it happening.

[siead_lietrathua]

"Mommy suffered personal injuries, medical expense, pain, suffering, emotional distress, and other economic and non-economic losses, and will do so in the future."

to address this part:
personal injuries- pregnancy causes a ton of those, so check.
medical expenses- sperm donation, and other expenses of childbirth, check.
pain+suffering- goes with the first one, check
emotional distress- well, being alienated by her family and community because they're a bunch of bigot assholes... so check.
economic losses- possibly having to move, get a new job, etc, to get her kid out of racist asshole town= check.

granted, using a wrongful birth claim may be a case of throwing everything at the wall and seeing what sticks. but it does apply.

but, i was referring to how she would speak to a child. people sugarcoat shit for kids all the time. they don't need to know every detail of the case, they just need the gist. and the gist of the mom suing is because the clinic gave her the wrong donor.

i can't help but think if the races were reversed (a black mother receiving white sperm), that people would be much less willing to call the mom a racist because they ended up with a child they were not expecting.

[Rapscallion]

Of the pain and expenses, since the claimant was actively trying to become pregnant, surely the whole pain of childbirth and medical/care expenses for the child would have been expected anyway?

Rapscallion

[siead_lietrathua]

Of the pain and expenses, since the claimant was actively trying to become pregnant, surely the whole pain of childbirth and medical/care expenses for the child would have been expected anyway?

yes and no. she was willing to go through that for the child of the donor sperm she carefully selected. not with some random guy.
kinda like if you wanted to have a kid with your boyfriend. then found out it's not his baby, but some random dude that you got drunk with in a bar. the pregnancy isn't something you chose anymore, since it's the wrong person's kid. (yes, bad analogy, but it still involved two sperm sets)

[Gravekeeper]

to address this part:
personal injuries- pregnancy causes a ton of those, so check.
medical expenses- sperm donation, and other expenses of childbirth, check.
pain+suffering- goes with the first one, check

What Raps said. There are no expenses her above and beyond what was already expected except refunding the cost of the sperm.

emotional distress- well, being alienated by her family and community because they're a bunch of bigot assholes... so check.

That is not what she is claiming is the cause of emotional distress. The cause is black baby. Hence how this is will be most unpleasant when the kid grows up.

economic losses- possibly having to move, get a new job, etc, to get her kid out of racist asshole town= check.

Even if she could prove actually prove that in court and it was legally acceptable, which is unlikely, she is asking for over $50,000 minimum.

granted, using a wrongful birth claim may be a case of throwing everything at the wall and seeing what sticks. but it does apply.

No, it doesn't. Again, this is not what wrongful birth is for. Wrongful birth is a very clear legal concept. It must involve negligence leading to the birth of a child whose defects or impairments will cause the parents a lifelong burden. It must also involve the parents not having the option to decide what to do had they known of the child's condition prior to birth. It is a type of malpractice tort. Damages are generally awarded based solely on the financial burden of the child's care. Not on emotional distress.

Being half-black is not a defect. Additionally, she did discover the error soon enough to explore other options. But imagine the world of public crucifixion if she had aborted a child for being black. That still leaves adoption, which she did not opt for. She opted to keep the child despite whatever horrific damages it is apparently inflicting on her. So that further undermines her entire case.

By her own accounts she loves her daughter and is totally happy with her....yet lives in constant unbridled terror somehow.

but, i was referring to how she would speak to a child. people sugarcoat shit for kids all the time. they don't need to know every detail of the case, they just need the gist. and the gist of the mom suing is because the clinic gave her the wrong donor.

I'm not talking about when the kid is young enough to ask why she's black. I'm talking about when the kid is old enough to Google her name and watches interviews of her mom going on about how terrible it is to have to have this child.

i can't help but think if the races were reversed (a black mother receiving white sperm), that people would be much less willing to call the mom a racist because they ended up with a child they were not expecting.

If the situation was reversed there wouldn't be much of a problem as the child would still resemble her parent and there's no way a black woman would be freaking out about having to learn "White culture" and drive to hostile white neighbours to get her kid's hair cut.

[munchkinmama]

I don't get the whole thing about having to learn black culture and having such a hard time dealing with the kid's hair. I have two kids that are half black and I am as white as Casper the ghost. I haven't had to learn anything different simply because my kids are half black. Also I learned how to do my kids hair and simply called salons to see if they had anyone familiar with black hair working. If I can find such things in the white, rural out in the sticks area I am in then it is possible to do.

[siead_lietrathua]

If the situation was reversed there wouldn't be much of a problem as the child would still resemble her parent and there's no way a black woman would be freaking out about having to learn "White culture" and drive to hostile white neighbours to get her kid's hair cut.

er, i can easily imagine if a black woman ends up with a child that ends up with a fair few white racial traits, and ends up taking the kid to places that are predominatly white to deal with them, the black mother may be made to feel 'outcast' by the white people. (YYMV, but the op lives in a racist area, so too shall my hypothetical mom).

also, the mom doesn't say how much she doesn't want the kid. in every article i've read (a good 7 or 8 by now) it says that her and her partner both love the hell outta the kid. it's the extended family that is the problem. so this "mom hates me" is bullshit. it's "i have a diffrent daddy than mom expected!"
the kid will be less fucked up by that than, say, the kids who'se moms have hit Maury for the 10th paternety test.