Just read something interesting RE: child support.

[TheRoo]

That's a tough spot to be in. As a non-custodial father, I hate parents like that who make the rest of us who spend time with our kids and pay a reasonable amount of child support look bad.

I can't imagine $334 gets you very far with 3 kids. I pay more than double that for 1 kid. You certainly deserve more than that, especially if he's hiding his income for the sole purpose to avoid paying.

One thing you may consider is trying to find a lawyer who will give you a free consultation. When I was going through my divorce, I talked to 3 different lawyers before I settled on one, and two of the three (including the one I went with) gave me an hour of their time for free before I had to come up with a retainer. That way, you can see if it's worth it to hire someone to get what is rightfully yours without any more investment than your time.

If you're close to the border of the other states, you may also want to see if any local lawyers are members of the other states bars. It didn't matter for us, because all of our case was intra-state, but the lawyer we went with was a member of the bar for a neighboring state as well, and I could see that coming in handy if you're dealing with child support rules from multiple states.

[Canarr]

@voiding the divorce: no. The payment of child support follows the divorce, not the other way around, so it would have no bearing on the legal state of the marriage. Otherwise, you might force someone to pay child support by threatening to forcibly remarry them if they don't...

Do you have any kind of proof concerning his illegitimate income? If so, forwarding that to court might help already.

[wolfie]

@voiding the divorce: no. The payment of child support follows the divorce, not the other way around, so it would have no bearing on the legal state of the marriage. Otherwise, you might force someone to pay child support by threatening to forcibly remarry them if they don't...

You forgot to mention - if the divorce were voided, and the "would be paying" ex-spouse had remarried in the meantime, they'd wind up in violation of the law against bigamy.

[DGoddess]

I could see this being good and bad and I wonder why they didn't instead just change the rules on child support so that the mother could get more. I'm not sure how it's calculated now. I'm curious about how this law came about. Seems it would work best for everyone if mothers just got more in child support because it sounds like with this, the only way to get more is to live with someone and have an extra income rather than living on your own with the children. I would think more people are benefited the other way around? You might check and see if the new state calculates child support different as well and might up the amount you would get.

I know in my state back when Mom had to file through the state for child support increase it was 17 !/2 percent per child (on gross income, ie before taxes are taken out.)

Using that figure, my Mom, who up to that point was getting $50/week for 2 children saw it go up to $65/week just for one (I had aged out due to graduating HS in 1988 and Dad, in his infinite stupidity sent a check for $25 w/out discussion. So Mom did what she needed, was to go through the Child Support Enforcement section of the NC court system.)

Also the parent paying support also has to furnish insurance for that child until the child is aged out (back then it was either 18 or graduated from HS. I think now it's age 26 unless they are full time employed or some such.) In my brother's case, Dad was already paying family rate for insurance through his employer (which covered 4 family members including Dad) so my brother was a "free rider" (ie, it didn't cost extra to add him on the family insurance plan and Dad also had to furnish a card for Mom in order to my brother to go to doctor's visits and it be billed to insurance.)

In this case, I'm not sure. I'm also not familiar w/interstate custody/support arrangement (both my parents live in NC so getting everything straightened out was pretty simple affair logistically) but perhaps an attorney in your area who specializes in family law (divorces/child custody/support) who could give you a free consultation might be a good option.

If you can't get to a private attorney, you can check w/your county's Legal Aid office and see what resources you can find. Either way you'd be better served on something like this w/legal representation rather than doing this alone.

I know back when my Mom was getting support from my Dad for both of us kids, she remarried when I was 16. Stepdad worked side jobs and everything else (he worked full time as a supervisor for a local painting company) to support not only the four of us (himself, Mom and 2 stepkids) but was also paying child support for his son (to his first ex-wife) AND helping with more direct means of suport (b/c the child support was being sqaundered by the ex and Stepdad's son didn't always have what he needed, so Mom would go over weekly and sneak food over to him, clothing or whatever else he needed AND had to have a lock installed on his bedroom door - otherwise whomever was in the house - and his mom had a revolving door of scum coming back and forth - would go through the child's room and take whatever they wanted. )

If there had been a way here in NC for stepparents to file for reiumbursement from the non custodial parent, I'm sure my stepdad would have found a way. But back in the 80's there weren't any laws to that effect on the books that I know of.

Perhaps this is relatively new concept in family law. BTW, what state are you in?