People in relationships

[Nyoibo]

Fine, I'm happy for you, but you can stop reminding me of it, I don't need to be constantly hearing about your boyfriend/girlfriend, I don't need to hear how much you miss them or feel alone if you haven't seen them for a day and I deffinately don't need to hear how fucking good it is to have a boyfriend/girlfriend. I have enough trouble dealing with being alone and single as it is without you rubbing it in my face all the time.

[Peppergirl]

Fine, I'm happy for you, but you can stop reminding me of it, I don't need to be constantly hearing about your boyfriend/girlfriend, I don't need to hear how much you miss them or feel alone if you haven't seen them for a day and I deffinately don't need to hear how fucking good it is to have a boyfriend/girlfriend. I have enough trouble dealing with being alone and single as it is without you rubbing it in my face all the time.

Marry me?

Kidding aside, I can totally relate. The only difference with me is that I'm loving being alone right now.

And I, too, wanna tell those people to STFU. It's fine to feel that way about your S/O, I've just never been that type of person (even when I was in a relationship), so I can't relate. So, while I'm happy that some of my friends FEEL that way about someone, the need to constantly point it out to me gets really old, and makes me wonder if they're 'protesting too much'.

[Rapscallion]

I had two lesbians (not partners, just friends) tell me on Saturday that I had the right idea by being single. They were somewhat envious. Granted, I don't get my duck sicked, but I don't have to put up with the drama.

Rapscallion

[Slytovhand]

OMG - how did you ever manage to breathe before they came along in your life??

Yeah, I totally get you there Nyoibo. I just do not get how people can be so insecure just because they don't have a current SO. Or the "I haven't had sex in 2 weeks!! OMG, I'm going to die!!!" (eleventy)

Yeah? Big woop. I haven't had any in a couple of years, I'm still alive. I haven't jumped out of a plane in over 10 years, and I'm pretty sure that it rates higher than sex!

[Greenday]

I can't stand it. The whole attitude that you'll never survive if you don't see your boyfriend (I don't have any guy-friends who do this) immediately, even if you literally were just hanging out with him about two hours ago. If you can't deal with being apart from your SO for even a couple hours, I don't want to listen to your needy-ass complain.

[Boozy]

Meh. New relationships cause people to blather on to friends who are not interested.

I'm sure I've done it, in the past. When people are excited about something, they talk about it a lot. I think it's rude to go on and on about one's boyfriend or girlfriend if the person they're talking to has made it clear that they are single and unhappy about it. But otherwise, it's just a bit annoying.

I've had to listen to a few friends talk my ear off about their new computer, or new car. I'm not at all interested in those things, but because they're my friends, I'll put up with it for a bit.

If they're going on and on about their new car, and I want a new car and can't afford one, I'll let them know that I'm happy for them, but would prefer it if they'd please talk about the details with someone else.

[smileyeagle1021]

Preach it sister!

Gah, it's so annoying people who love to point out just how happy they are (in this and other areas) in spite of the fact (or worse because of the fact) they know it's something you aren't happy about how it's going in your life.
(and yes, I did have a so called friend who knows that I feel like a bit of a freak for being 22 and never being in a relationship, save a fake relationship I had during high school. Don't get me wrong, I did care for her, but we both knew it was a relationship of convenience, I got to hide my homosexuality, she got her dad, who could tell that I honestly meant it when I said I had no intention of defiling his daughter, off her back. Oh back on topic, 22, no relationship, in a family where I'm the only one in this generation not married or at the very least in something long term and stable, living in a state where the only reason you aren't settled down by 25 is because you're having way too much fun with your one night stands... of which I'm not getting either.)

[blas87]

There are some people out there that I will do it to, because back a couple of years ago when I was perpetually single and constantly being stood up and replaced in favor of high school girls....these were the people who were in long term relationships with the same person since 10th grade, blah blah blah....rub it in why don't you.......so now, I can rub it in that I've finally been with a guy for more than 6 months and he hasn't ran away yet

[tabbyblack13]

w00t!!! You just made my day! I hate having to deal with this too. What's worst is when you are friends with both of the people in the relationships. When you hang out with one you constantly hear about the other.

[Lace Neil Singer]

I talk about my boyf to friends; however, I don't go on or make it the only topic of conversation. If you're referring to fluffbrains who seem to be joined at the hip to their other half and can't talk about anything else, then I agree; that is extremely annoying and makes me wonder why I even bother to talk to them. It's like you're talking to someone who's not really there; they're partly elsewhere, joined to their SO. However, if you burst a blood vessel every time someone says, "My boyf/girlf", then I think you're being needlessly oversensitive. Part of the world is coupled up, so deal with it.

Before you go nuts, I was single for a long time before I met my boyf, and I learned to deal with it. Of course, some things are annoying, like friends trying to set you up with their ugly male friends, or being referred to as "Poor Lace" just cuz you're the only one not swapping stories about how your boyf gets on your tits. But there's no point in getting too uptight. If someone's boring you to death, just tell them that you'd like to discuss something other than their SO tonight; that's why you asked to meet up with them so you could talk.

[smileyeagle1021]

If you're referring to fluffbrains who seem to be joined at the hip to their other half and can't talk about anything else, then I agree.

yup, at least those are the people I"m talking about... or the ones who will tell you about their great relationship as a segway into asking why you're still single, and don't you want what they have... oh, those people drive me nuts.

[guywithashovel]

Normally, people don't talk to me about their relationships.

However, I do have a pet peeve that is related to this topic.

I am single, and I guess you could say that I'm "on the lookout." I don't devote every waking hour to finding that special someone, but I am on a perpetual quest to find her.

What is this pet peeve that I am talking about: It's the women who are already in relationships (or married) who are really friendly and sociable with me and thus get my hopes up.

I may sound overly sensitive about this, but this happens a lot in my life. I can't tell you how many times it's happened over the years. I'll meet a girl. She'll sometimes even approach me and make the first steps towards us getting to know each other. She'll be really friendly and smily with me, and sometimes even exhibit behavior that could possibly be interpreted as flirtatious. She will proceed to be this way every time we interact with each other. As time progresses, I'll start thinking, "Okay, maybe this is going somewhere; maybe she's the one I've been looking for."

But then, we'll be in a conversation one day, and she'll casually say something like, "Oh yeah, me and my boyfriend really like that restaurant." Or even better, "My husband is picking me up later on. Would you like to meet him?"

I simply cannot tell you how many times this has happened in my life. Before, I just brushed it off. Sure, I would feel a little disappointed after the "unveiling" of the fact that she wasn't available. But I would quickly move on. But anymore now, it's starting to get on my nerves.

For the past year, I have been doing volunteer work at a local library. Throughout this time, I got friendly with this girl who worked there (in the same manner as described above). Then, this past December, our department had a little pizza lunch for everyone. While she, myself, and several other people were sitting in a circle enjoying our food, she started talking about what she was getting her boyfriend's kids for Christmas.

I literally wanted to start banging my head against the wall.

Yes, I know I'm probably coming off as one of those whiny guys who complains about how he never can get a chick. But this happens to me a lot. Does anyone else have this problem? If so, please tell me (males AND females, please). If necessary, we'll start a new thread so as to not hijack this one.

[Wingates_Hellsing]

Ah yet another variation of the 'and they wont shut up' dilemma.

Is this specifically the 'was relevant but goes too long' or the 'why did you say it out loud AGAIN?' or maybe it's the rare 'and this means you call me at 4 AM?' variety....

Let's face it, people get annoyed when other people say things that remind them of unpleasant things, or are annoying, or just plain disgusting or awkward.

This is the very reason why I barely open my mouth in public and often resent doing so when I inevitably say something dumb, nerdy, awkward or downright stupid.

So, in a remarkably backward, double standard, ironic and hypocritical twist of events: I would like to stop hearing about how just about anything I could say in public annoys people.

Being an introvert sucks, big time.

P.S. No, I don't have to read this thread, especially since I knew exactly what it was going to say before entering. Which, damage having already been done, left me with no reason not to give my opinion.

[Giggle Goose]

Again, it all goes back to mutual respect. I've been on both sides. I had two roommates who talked about their boyfriends (one of them was engaged, actually) NONSTOP. It was even worse with all the wedding planning taking everything over. It sucked, but I knew deep down that I would find the right person . In the meantime I just focused on ME and becoming a better person for when that special someone came along. If it got annoying (which was often), I just left the room or changed the subject. I also agree that if you feel the need to blather on and on about your SO, then it's a bit sad that you need validation from others to feel secure about your own relationship.


Now that I have someone I'm happy with, I try to anticipate what other people are feeling before I speak. I won't talk about "couple-y" stuff if I know whoever I'm talking to is having a hard time being single or whatnot, because I know how it feels. But to the single people here: Are you just going to keep completely silent if you meet someone you're absolutely over the moon with? I doubt it. Just like I won't keep quiet if my boyfriend and I did something fun over the weekend. Big deal. He's a part of my life. Just like my work, family, hobbies, and pets. How would you feel if someone didn't "feel like" listening to something you thought was imporant? And to the people who DO talk about nothing but your SO: Find a new hobby or something. You'll become a better partner, have other things to talk about, AND you won't annoy your single friends. No one should have to apologize for their relationship status, no matter what it is.

[blas87]

I agree with GiggleGoose 100%

And by the way, not only do girls do that to single guys, but guys do it to girls just as often.

When I was single, I always seemed to attract the "freshly wounded" males. The ones freshly single and just looking for someone to keep them occupied while they waited for their perfect ex to take them back. Of course, that part was a secret. They'd make it sound like they wanted something new and to try something with someone new and see where it went.

I'm glad I finally met someone honest and who had been single for well over a year.