Being on Welfare

[SorryIsGoodEnough]

I am a hispanic single mother on welfare.

I live in transitional housing.

I am classified as severely mentally ill, and I am getting treatment.

And every single thing I do to get out of the system to improve my life and the life of my child gets shot down. If I get a part time job to start paying off my debt, I might not qualify for child care assistance. So I can't work at all.

I used King County's own calculator to determine how much money I'd need to make to be completely self sufficient, with NO aid from the Department of Social and Health Services. But even if I get a job making $3 less than that, they take me off of aid. Even though by their own god damn calculations, I could not be self sufficient.

I don't want to be on welfare. I'm tired of being a statistic. Why is it that I have to either have to stay at home and wallow in my mental health disability and never work for anything or I have to work two jobs just to barely get by? Why can't I get JUST childcare assistance and medical benefits until I can make enough to pay rent without Section 8 AND pay the $1000 for daycare? It's like every time I take a step towards being a contributing, productive member of society, DSHS tells me to quit.

Sometimes, I don't know why I bother trying to get off of welfare. If they want to pay for me to do nothing, why don't I just let them? Because the only lesson I'm learning is that hard work deserves to be punished.

[Rapscallion]

Because the only lesson I'm learning is that hard work deserves to be punished.

Oh, it is. Trust me, it is.

More seriously...

For the UK, though, I do know that there's many occasions where the newspapers will be the public scourge of the 'layabouts on the social'. However, the truth is that I couldn't survive on the amounts given out on social security.

A chum of mine told me about when she was on holiday recently fixing up her new house. She mentioned that town centres turn grim during the day when chavs and chavettes - often with chavlings in pushchairs - roam the place looking for somewhere warm to sit down for a while to save on heating at home. They spend hours in stores, just looking at soaking up the heat, without any means or intent of buying anything.

Social (welfare) isn't really as good as the newspapers claim.

Rapscallion

[Flyndaran]

At least you get help. At age 35, I'm going to finally get a court hearing about my problem tomorrow.

I'm sorry that your are ill, but am I alone in disliking a severely ill person being the only caretaker of a child?

[Rapscallion]

Not everything in this world is about you, old bean.

Rapscallion

[Flyndaran]

Not everything in this world is about you, old bean.

Rapscallion

No, but I am pleasantly surprised about a fellow head case getting help.

[SorryIsGoodEnough]

I'm sorry that your are ill, but am I alone in disliking a severely ill person being the only caretaker of a child?

I do a good job. I feed her and bathe her and play with her and teach her to say please and thank you and stop and don't touch. Really, the stress of taking care of her alone only affects me. I don't let her want for anything (including appropriate discipline.)

Taking care of her is the only thing I do right, according to DSHS. So in that, at least, I am not a failure.

[BlaqueKatt]

but am I alone in disliking a severely ill person being the only caretaker of a child?

You had no issue with old single people having children-and I suggest watching the movie 'I am Sam".

I was the sole caretaker of my son until he was 2(his father was in the military)-I have autism-should I not have been allowed to care for him?

[Flyndaran]

You had no issue with old single people having children-and I suggest watching the movie 'I am Sam".

I was the sole caretaker of my son until he was 2(his father was in the military)-I have autism-should I not have been allowed to care for him?

Don't get me wrong. People with severe disabilities can be very good people. I just don't think they should have total responsibility for children.
I have no problem with elderly caretakers as long as they are healthy physically, mentally, and emotionally.

[BroomJockey]

I have no problem with elderly caretakers as long as they are healthy physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Apparently just with testing to ensure they'll remain that way long enough...

[Boozy]

Don't get me wrong. People with severe disabilities can be very good people. I just don't think they should have total responsibility for children.

Well, we don't know the exact nature of the OP's disability, and from the sounds of it, she's doing a great job regardless. So let's leave it at that.

and I suggest watching the movie 'I am Sam".

I liked that movie, but it was a fictional story. So I don't know exactly what it could teach us about reality.

[SorryIsGoodEnough]

I don't like myself being her sole caretaker either. I'd be much more confident in her upbringing if I had help, but only because I'm so emotionally wrecked that I have to force happiness and relaxation so she doesn't pick up on it. Her father doesn't want her, and I do, so I guess that's what matters.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

SorryIs, I don't know what to tell you, only that I am sorry. I have a friend in the same boat. I don't want to threadjack, but the gist of the story was that she was told by someone in the welfare office that "it would be better to quit her job and just stay on the welfare." The governer's office denied this was said, but I am here to tell you it was.

Understatement of the Year: our system is very messed up. It's not set up to help people help themselves.

I'm sorry.

[anriana]

I thought welfare had a time limit.

[Rapscallion]

I thought welfare had a time limit.

In the UK, jobseeker allowance (a bit extra to help search for work) is limited time, or it used to be. Social security is pretty much permanent. Disability allowance is definitely as long as the disability lasts (usually permanently).

No idea about the US.

Rapscallion

[AdminAssistant]

No idea about the US.

About the same, methinks. Although there is a difference between short-term and long-term disability; the first being for things like surgeries and recoverable injuries.