Yes, I know there's been a ton of scandals about how big newspapers are slanted, fictitious, or whatever.
Yes, I know that some of the stories that we run from the national wire are a little goofy.
Yes, I know that Rush Limbaugh, Wolf Blizer, Keith Oberman, and whoever else, name someone on any side of a political spectrum, says that the newspapers are liars.
Okay, but when I work here, and you don't, and I see the photographer come in from a car wreck with blood stains on his clothes, or the court reporter playing her tape recorder so we can all get a good laugh at the insanity of the religious nutjob on trial, etc. Pretty sure if you came here and hung out for a day, you'd get your world rocked at what sort of weird-ass shit is really going on in the world around you that you don't even know about.
Do you know what a Wizzinator is? No? I do.
Do you know that you can make a bomb out of a kid's SCHOOLBOOK? I do.
Have you ever seen what happens to someone who smokes meth for five years straight? I have. I just got done shooing it out of here.
You seen the pictures of the director of one of the area homeless shelters smashing some of the donations? I'm holding them right now. Yet you take her word for it that it's a lie and you're calling to scream at me because "newspapers always lie."
And yet you subscribe to us every day.
...stop calling me. Seriously.
Yes, I know that some of the stories that we run from the national wire are a little goofy.
Yes, I know that Rush Limbaugh, Wolf Blizer, Keith Oberman, and whoever else, name someone on any side of a political spectrum, says that the newspapers are liars.
Okay, but when I work here, and you don't, and I see the photographer come in from a car wreck with blood stains on his clothes, or the court reporter playing her tape recorder so we can all get a good laugh at the insanity of the religious nutjob on trial, etc. Pretty sure if you came here and hung out for a day, you'd get your world rocked at what sort of weird-ass shit is really going on in the world around you that you don't even know about.
Do you know what a Wizzinator is? No? I do.
Do you know that you can make a bomb out of a kid's SCHOOLBOOK? I do.
Have you ever seen what happens to someone who smokes meth for five years straight? I have. I just got done shooing it out of here.
You seen the pictures of the director of one of the area homeless shelters smashing some of the donations? I'm holding them right now. Yet you take her word for it that it's a lie and you're calling to scream at me because "newspapers always lie."
And yet you subscribe to us every day.
...stop calling me. Seriously.
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