Originally posted by Boozy
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That I Can't Be Happy...
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A quick update:
Things are much much better. I'm doing better in my Women's History class (A- on the last paper!!) and in classes in general. I've got some of my confidence back. My show opened last night, and it was amazing. A bunch of my friends went with me, brought me flowers, I actually wore a dress, and we all went out to dinner after. The show went so well...and I don't have to be in rehearsals anymore! Wooot.
A friend of mine from undergrad is coming to visit next weekend, which is exciting and a little...scary? awkward? I haven't seen him in 3 years. Should be fun though, I'm caught up on work enough that I can spare time to hang out.
So...things are looking up in most places, except on the relationship front and I just don't have time to deal with it right now. Which is sad, but the truth. Meh.
Anyways, thanks for all the good wishes and PM's, it helped through a bit of a rough patch!
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Originally posted by AdminAssistant View Postfor my friends.
I have lots of friends that are getting married, in new relationships, having children, or are otherwise doing well in life - due to their posts on Facebook. I know I should post my congratulations....but I can't. Seeing it just makes me feel heartsick.
I'm 26 freakin' years old, and I've only had a few relationships. Don't feel like I can attract anyone in my current state (overweight). Don't have the ambition or ability to do much about that. I'm struggling with my classes and wondering if I've made a terrible, horrible decision. Do I even belong here? I keep waiting for somebody to send me back to the farm....inferiority complex to the max. I tend not to say things in class or rehearsal, because I'm so afraid it will be wrong and I'll look stupid. Teaching is a little better, but I'm still afraid. What if I say something wrong? What if I don't answer their question enough? Will they give me a low evaluation? Will I get kicked out of the program?
I'm depressed, I'm completely stressed out, and I just need a vacation. A real vacation, not a break from school where I try to catch up on my work and fail. I've never gone on a vacation as an adult. I wouldn't have anyone to go with...well, friends, but they're also grad students and are dealing with many of my problems.
I dunno, I guess being dumped last month has just sent me into a long downward spiral. I'll climb out eventually, always do. But right now...I'm just...meh.
And on top of that, I feel like a horrible friend. :-(
Some days, I really have to wonder why I don't just buy a gun and end it all.
But back to the topic at hand... I haven't had a Valentine on Valentine's Day since... 1994, I believe it was. As it is, I usually prefer to work on Valentine's Day, and I always hope to be too busy to notice all the happy couples out enjoying their day together, because the sight of them enjoying what I apparently can never have fills me with a homicidal rage that words can't even begin to describe... especially since so many of them don't even APPRECIATE what they have!
I should have become a supervillain... at least then I'd be able to keep busy with trying to invent a doomsday bomb to wipe out all life on Earth!Last edited by Jack T. Chance; 05-02-2010, 02:56 AM."You guys are so unhip, it's a wonder your bums don't fall off!"
--Zaphod Beeblebrox
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