"Haha! You can't do this, so let's make fun of you!"

[McDreidel09]

I understand that my friends like to tease me. I'm cool with it. However, sometimes it can go a bit too far.

A few days ago, I asked one of my guy friends if he could set up my printer. I had read the instructions myself, but I just couldn't grasp how to do it. I tried looking at the pictures, but that didn't work. I asked my gal friends if they could help me. They said no. I am technology challenged. I can use the computer to go on the internet and write my papers, the only reason I need it for. I just can't set up electronic devices.

Well, it took him about 10 minutes with making sure it worked properly.

Now my friends make fun of me for not being able to set up my printer and before that, I didn't know how to hook up the dvd player to the television.

Once in a while is ok. However, they say it as if they are superior to me. They say it as if I am stupid and mean it. One of my gal friends was like "I set up MY OWN printer. I didn't need HELP."

I'm sorry. I don't understand the directions very well and I can't read picture directions. Sad to say. I can't.

How does not being able to set up a printer make you dumb? There are many things that I can do that are a bit more useful. One of my friends can't cook. Yet, I don't make fun of her because I can cook well and she can't. It doesn't make her any stupider.

I even snapped at them about it. They still continued. It really pisses me off that they continue with it and continue to make me look and feel stupid about it. So I can't do something like that. So what? I can do many other things. UGH.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Yeah, I can see where that would really grind your gears. I am pretty laid back when it comes to joking around from my friends, too, but if anyone were to ever make fun of something like they meant it, or wanted to act like I was stupid about it, I'd have to have a Come To Jesus meeting with them about it.

That is not cool.

I cannot do math, as you probably know. I am also very far from being "stupid." That is a sore spot with me. I don't care if my friends want to kid around with my lack of directional sense or inabilty to figure simple math quickly in my head. Heck, I joke around about it myself. But the minute someone wants to equate that with me being stupid is when there will be a problem.

[violetyoshi]

Why are you friends with these people? By all logic, you shouldn't be friends with those who bully you. Are you so desperate just to have friends, you're willing to put up with abuse?

I think these so called friends of yours aren't worth your time or effort, try and find nice friends. Let those losers hatesturbate amongst themselves.

[AdminAssistant]

Are you so desperate just to have friends, you're willing to put up with abuse?

McD has just moved away to go to college, and the first semester is always rough in getting to know people. I wouldn't insult her further by saying she's desperate.

McD - try not to fret over it too much. They're obviously clueless. You have many many opportunities to make friends in college, and you really don't need those that would bring you down or hurt your feelings. I'm equally...challenged...when it comes to electronics, and frequently have to ask friends "dumb" questions. Luckily, I've got a number of friends in-town that are very computer savvy and will work for booze, and won't tease me about it later. That's just very mean.

[Mytical]

Not knowing how to do something does not make you dumb, by a long shot. Nobody can create instant intergalactic travel, but that doesn't mean that we are all stupid. I was always told "The only dumb question is one you never ask." and live by that. Maybe find wiser friends?

[Mr Slugger]

See my motto is that everyone has their thing. For instance my wife doesn't understand tech stuff at all. I mean hell if the Skype phone goes out she can't even figure that out and usually all you have to do is unplug it and plug it back in. I'm wicked good with computers, and I can usually fix almost anything. However I'm bad with people stuff. Mainly names. I know everyone by face, what they buy, but not names. Where my wife knows everyone's name. So why make fun of someone because chances are they're better than you on something else.

[Lace Neil Singer]

Not knowing how to do something does not make you dumb, by a long shot. Nobody can create instant intergalactic travel, but that doesn't mean that we are all stupid. I was always told "The only dumb question is one you never ask." and live by that.

Or "If 42 is the answer, then what is the ultimate question?" XD

I however when I come out with stuff like that, don't consider people stupid just cuz they haven't read the books I have. Next time your friends start poking fun at you, remind them of all the things they can't do and say, "Well, going by your logic, that makes us all stupid together." Hopefully they'll realise just how idiotic they're being and stop.

[McDreidel09]

I really don't appreciate being called desperate. For a lack of a better phrase to use, that's not really nice at all. I came on here to vent my frustration and I was insulted. Thank you for sticking up for me, AA.

Other than this little glitch, these are great friends. They have stopped bringing it up. I was just frustrated at the time. The joke is over. They just didn't truly realize how it made me feel because their idea of joking around is taking it kinda far, as they are used to it with their siblings, who can take it better than I can

It was a simple misunderstanding. After all, I have only known these people since September and there is still so much to learn.

[blas87]

I'll also stick up for you, little sis, because I know you aren't the desperate for friends type.

No one is perfect, we all know that. And no matter how many great qualities our friends and acquaintances may have, there are always at least a couple of bad ones.......a very common one that seems to be within almost everyone's group of friends is the brain to mouth filter constantly in need of maintenance.

You aren't alone. I have friends that pick on me too, and sometimes they take it a little too far and I do get hurt or really mad. But on the same note, I have taken it too far with them before too, on accident or on purpose, but I've never made fun of them for not being able to do something or insinuated that they were dumb.

This sounds easier said than done (and trust me, it is when you're the type of person who doesn't like conflict and arguments or even sparking tension) but what you have to do is swallow hard, try to NOT let it get to you, and when the time is right, just stand up for yourself. Say something very blunt and not overly bitchy like "I am not stupid, and I'd appreciate if you'd watch your jokes and quips a little more." and you can add more if you need to.

[Flyndaran]

I had the opposite problem. Just because I'm good at science, math, and vocabulary, everyone kept going on and on about my intelligence.
You know what? I would gladly drop some of those for a little social, or other intelligence. Just look at all the weird stupid things I write that make you think I'm an educated idiot. Being called something you know you aren't can get depressing, so I end up feeling the same as the OP.
Having bad friends is worse than no friends in my book. Then again with my social anxiety, this view may just be a self-defense mechanism.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Are you so desperate just to have friends, you're willing to put up with abuse?

.

Well, this is nice.

Hope I never fall down with you in the room. And if I do, I just hope you don't wear steel toed boots.

So, did you mean to insult McDreidel09? Because if you didn't, I would think you'd be falling all over yourself to make sure she knew that.

Also, McDreidel, your friends might not realize what they are doing and how it hurts you. I was in a similar situation years ago, where a friend (and yes, he was a friend) kept going on about something to the point where it really started pissing me off. Another friend mentioned to him that maybe he had better lay off it and that it was upsetting to me. The idea that my feelings might have been hurt by his "joking around" mortified him, and he immediately and sincerely apologized. He really felt bad that he had been insensitive. So maybe you ought to let them know that you are finding their joking around to be rather tedious and hurtful.

[Peppergirl]

Why are you friends with these people? By all logic, you shouldn't be friends with those who bully you. Are you so desperate just to have friends, you're willing to put up with abuse?

So coming here to vent about the insensitivities of her friends makes her desperate?

Her friends were being insensitive boneheads, not abusive assholes. She vented about them, and clearly wanted to commisserate with others - not be called desperate and made to feel worse.

That is bullshit. I'm sorry, but I think you owe McD an apology.

[guywithashovel]

I have found myself in this situation before. I don't think you're being overly sensitive, either. Sometimes people get so carried away with trying to be funny that they don't realize they're hurting people in the process. I do get annoyed with people who think they have to be cracking a new joke every five minutes and have no problem making other people the brunt of said jokes, but I try to understand that they probably don't mean anything by it. It's still annoying, though.

[Flyndaran]

There are few things more hurtful than unintentional bad jokes.
I've told a few. They weren't hurtful to my knowledge, but they were embarrassingly inane and not what I intended.

[gremcint]

Next time they comment on it just:

1. stand up
2. say: "I'm so sick of hearing about that, it's just not fucking funny anymore"
3. and leave, walk away, don't look back just leave.

If they don't get the message from that tell them to fuck off.