Handing over your paycheck to your significant other

[Bright Star]

I run into people every so often who when they get paid, hand over their entire paycheck to their spouse or significant other to pay bills & what have you. Then they have to turn around and ask for money for the week! In my view, I think that's disturbing. Seems to me a person works hard for their money so why should they just hand over the entire thing? I understand clearly about the need for couples to share the costs in housing & basic utlities but I think it's going overboard in just handing over your hard earned money.

What's the point in doing that when you then have to turn around and ask the person you just handed your check over to, for some spending money for the week? That's like asking your parents for some cash! Two adult couples should treat each other with respect & not have finacial stuff turn into a power play.

Doing that works for some but not for everybody. I sure as hell wouldn't do that. Every couple has their own system of paying bills.

[SorryIsGoodEnough]

It's more simple for one person to manage the finances. And when money is tight, budgeting is required and both people are gonna have to decide what purchases can be comfortably made.

As for me, when I was living with the alcoholic, it was just safer and easier for him to give his paycheck for ME to cash and distribute because he admitted he didn't have his priorities straight. I don't see how else it could have been done.

[jackfaire]

I agree it's disturbing especially when it is combined with the phenomenon I like to call, "I am an extension of my significant other" I have some people call into where I work and when I ask for their verifying information they always give me the other person's

[Greenday]

Let's say you have someone who is committed to you, but if they handle their own paycheck, it will be completely spent on useless crap. And then lets say that money is desperately needed to pay bills and such. I don't see any issue with willingly handing over your paycheck so you can't recklessly spend it.

[Fryk]

Handing over your paycheck like to me also is like saying "Here! Deal with this! I don't give two shits about this 'house' crap!" I don't get that. Like I said in another post, my wife and I deal with all our money communally. My money is hers, hers is mine. All of it is OURS. I don't expect her to hand over her paycheck and sign off total control to me, any more than I would do it myself. It only works if you both sit down and figure out your budget, and if one of us wants a shiny new toy to play with, we BOTH ask. That's how it should be, in my opinion.

[Boozy]

What's the big deal if a couple prefers to handle their money that way? It's simple division of labour.

Sometimes a couple has one half that is good with money and likes to handle the household budget, and one who doesn't like doing those things and is irresponsible with their money.

My finances are so wrapped up with my husband's that there's no sense in us thinking along the lines of "my money" and "his money". My paycheque is OUR money.

[Stormraven]

My lady and I get odd looks when we mention that we don't hold our money jointly. Mine is mine, hers is hers. Neither of us cares as long as our portion of the bills gets paid. Which it does.