"No you don't."

[McDreidel09]

I cannot emphasize how much I hate that so called joke.

Here is an example of how it would be used.

"Oh man. I better get going. I have a paper due in a few days and I need to get a head start on it."

"No you don't."

"Um. Yes I do."

"No you don't."

If I didn't really need to do it, then why would I say it? It is really aggravating to have people tell you that you don't need to do something when you really do.

I know that people jokingly do it, but the joke isn't funny.

[Fryk]

I don't see it as onfunny as much as I see it overused, and with no regard for context. I do that to my wife all the time, but only when it is so blatantly obvious that she does need to do whatever it is, that that becomes the joke. But people can't seem to stop doing it, the same as the "You're an (X)" joke

"I need a cigarette."

"YOU'RE a cigarette!"

Yeah, they're both fine, but when it goes on and on, I just want to throttle people.

[gremcint]

My sister has started using your face is and your mom is with doing it back to her sometimes to bug her.

Which led to this tongue in cheek conversation:

Her: My foot is sore.
Me: Your face is sore.
Her: Your mom is sore.
Me: She is? is she ok?
Her: we should call her.


I once ran into this one guy who would not stop doing the no you don't thing. If it wasn't on the job I would have ripped him a new one, what was annoying was when we were comparing internet speed and I commented I have dsl he just started saying nope you're on dialup over and over again.

I think part of this actually comes from the Simpsons, Homer has done that several times though he actually believes it.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

I don't get what is supposed to be funny about it.

Seriously, am I missing something? You say "I have to do x" and they say "no, you don't."

Clearly, there is more to this joke than I am getting.

[Stormraven]

I guess I've been lucky, but I've never heard it.

[kiwi]

On the flip side I can not stand it when people say
"Yes you do"
one of my god mothers says this ALL THE FREAKING TIME

"I dont like oysters"
"yes you do"
"um no I really dont"
"you just need to try one"
"I have and I DONT like them"
"oh yes you dooooo"

*bloodvessel bursts* no jury would convict me!

[Flyndaran]

I've also never heard it.
One of my favorite jokes of all time is when someone pulls out the mama jokes.
"Your mom is so fat..... we're worried, no really she needs help."

[Fryk]

Ugh, Kiwi. My mother in law does this with my wife every goddamn time she makes sloppy joes.My wife has NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER liked read meat. In case I uderstated that, NEVER EVER EVER EVER!
And EVERY single solitary goddamned time she tries to make them, my wife tells her this. And they have the same argument each time
"You do too like them!"
"No, I promise you, I don't!"
(Skip ahead 15 mins)
"When did you stop liking them? You used to!!"
"I've never liked red meat."
(Blah blah blah thirty minutes later)
"Well, you liked them when you were a kid!"
No, no she didn't, MIL. She just had no choice as a child, is all. No one wants to eat your nasty ground beef dipped in ketchup and stewed.

That is when this "No you don't" or "Yes you do" argument gets on my nerves: When it is CLEARLY not a joke. I think it's the dumbest debate tactic you can possibly bring to bear.

[Boozy]

I don't get what is supposed to be funny about it.

It's just childish humour. It's not funny to most people over the mental age of five.

[BroomJockey]

It's just childish humour. It's not funny to most people over the mental age of five.

Hey, that comment was insulting to those of us here who ARE the mental age of five. I didn't think that "no you don't" was funny in the slightest.

[Boozy]

Hey, that comment was insulting to those of us here who ARE the mental age of five.

lol

You're right, and I apologize.

[BroomJockey]

lol

You're right, and I apologize.

Apology accepted. Thank you.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

It almost seems on par with the thing people do when you ask a question or make a statement, and it gets answered with something either absurd or just...I dunno, weird.

My father and also a friend are guilty of that and it drives me nuts. In my dad's case, I cannot figure out why he keeps doing it.

For instance:

phone conversation:

Me: Can I talk to mom?
Him: No.
Me: Okay, can you have her call me when she gets a chance?
Him: I'm kidding. Here she is.
Me:

the is because I honestly do not understand why he would say that. Clearly, he's joking. However, jokes are meant to be humorous, and it does not even register tome that he is anything but serious. It makes me wonder if I simply don't get some humor. He's not the only one who does that, just probably to me, the most annoying. But I don't even get it.

I don't get slapstick, either. I just sit there with a blank in my thought processes, wondering why everyone else is laughing.

But then, I also laugh at things others dont, so clearly, it's me.

[blas87]

I understand the frustration.

It's just that some people I think, try way too hard to be funny, and it's really not funny at all.

[powerboy]

It's just that some people I think, try way too hard to be funny, and it's really not funny at all.

That is what it is. They try to be funny. They try hard and then it doesn't work. When I make someone laugh, it is because I do it at the spur of the moment.