People In Relationships Are Lame

[blas87]

I must disagree. It's the single friends who are always trying to get my bf to spend every weekend back home to get drunk and plastered that are lame.

[Cat]

I hate this sterotype....I can only see my bf on weekends (we live a bit far away from each other and both are employeed) so my weekends are usually either him coming to see me or me goin up to his place.

[blas87]

Same here Cat, same here. And on weeks that I don't have to go in early for OT, I see him in the middle of the week for a few hours before bed.

Yes, I do spend almost my entire weekend every weekend with my bf.....although most of the time, we go out with another couple. We still actively go out, to movies or out to eat, maybe to the bar for a few...but the point is, after a while, you get sick of party party party bar bar bar!! It gets SOOO old after a while.

Most of my single friends are still obsessed with partying until you puke, after-bar partying until the sun comes up....I myself got sick of being sick and hungover on Saturdays when I only get 2 nights off a week. That, and not drinking so much anymore, I have very little tolerance for the youngins at the bar so drunk and out of control.

I'm not a controlling gf and my bf is NOT pussy-whipped just because we spend all weekend together. He has pulled fast ones on me and waited until Thursday night to tell me he's off home for the weekend and I've been mad because I know he'll be blacking out drunk the whole time, but I'm not going to go after him or sit at home and sulk.

[AdminAssistant]

My situation is slightly different, since I'm in a long-distance relationship. I see the SO about once a month, so damn skippy on the weekends he's here we're going to be spending all that time together. We do go out with my friends when he's up here, or hang out with his roomies if I'm down there. But I spend as much time with him as I possibly can. If someone is happy in a relationship, of course they want to spend a lot of time with their SO.

[jackfaire]

Hell I am bloody single and not a fan of the bar scene. I won't even go to a bar unless they also serve food and can make a mean burger.

[Greenday]

So that brings me to the spending every minute of every weekend together or we'll die crowd. I've had friends that would complain to me how they haven't seen their boyfriend in nearly a whole week. Considering freshman year I got to see my girlfriend once every month or so, I really had no sympathy that your world was going to end because they might miss a weekend. Also, it's not like we can do stuff during the week so the weekend is the only time I get to see my friends. So when they HAVE to spend every waking minute with their SO the word "lame" comes to mind since they never have time for their friends and refuse to give up a couple hours to be social.

[AdminAssistant]

Also, it's not like we can do stuff during the week so the weekend is the only time I get to see my friends.

Why not? Why can't you hang out with friends during the week and have boyfriend/girlfriend time on the weekends?

[Greenday]

Why not? Why can't you hang out with friends during the week and have boyfriend/girlfriend time on the weekends?

Why can't they have boyfriend/girlfriend time during the week and we do friend stuff on weekends? I mean, instead of 6, 7, 8 people trying to work around their schedules, only two people would have to during the week and I KNOW their schedules involve free time at the same time.

[Peppergirl]

Granted, I'm old and you guys arent - but what we used to do back in my day (lol) was do one weekend night with friends and one with the bf/gf. That way it was fair to everyone and I got my couple time AND my friend time.

I loved my friend time, so I was never one of the ones to only hang with my bf, even when I was in the infatuation stage..but I had friends who were up their bf's asses all the time and it used to drive me nuts.

I see both sides, but it's harder for me to relate to the 'spend every waking minute' side because I was never like that, even as a teen. Maybe I'm the odd one?

Then again, despite having been married for 15 years, I'm definitely better as a single. I'm happier alone, so maybe I'm not the best person to chime in here.

Sorry. Carry on! lol

[blas87]

Go ahead and keep thinking we're all lame for spending our only time off with our SOs. We don't care.

Maybe other people can work around it, but me working nights, unless there is no overtime that week and I can squeeze a few hours during a Wednesday or Thursday, I CANNOT see my boyfriend during the week because I'd end up staying there all day or wouldn't get enough sleep or wouldn't get any errands done. My weekends are my only option, and I'm fine with it. I won't DIE if we miss a weekend, but I'll sure be bummed. That means I'll probably go out with my girlfriends (or if I'm lucky, my married friend) which isn't bad because I won't have to drive and won't have to worry about drinking too much, but nowadays I cannot keep up with them and their drinking anymore....and I don't even find it that much fun anymore. Just seeing them is plenty for me, but the only way they'll do anything with ME is if I go out with THEM. Only my married friend is willing to do other stuff with me, because she and I are on the same page.

And like I already said, my bf and I hang out with our married friends. So we're "lame" together, then. But at least we can hang out, have fun, maybe a drink or two, but still get home in enough time and not be sloppy drunk and whiskey dick'ed.

[Cat]

Same here,.....it is extremely difficult to see my bf during the week, so we get the weekends. Every now and then we will skip a weekend, and like blas, I'll hang with my friends. It sucks, but that is the way things are. Esp since for work I drive 250 miles a week (I *hate* driving) When I have bf weekends, I don't have to drive.

If my friends can't handle that, eff them. If they whine I cannot make time for them during the weekend, I ask why they cannot make time for me during the week. If they continue to whine that I am selfish, they are no longer a good friend.

[AdminAssistant]

If they continue to whine that I am selfish, they are no longer a good friend.

Exactly.

Perhaps instead of saying, "We're going to X bar" ask your friend what her and her bf would like to do with you guys. There's no reason you can't all hang out together at a place that isn't a bar. Have you ever been a minor at a bar? It fucking sucks, mkay? But don't blame your friend for not wanting to ditch her bf to hang with the buddies.

Let's put in another way: Would you rather get drunk or get laid?

[linguist]

due to conflicting work/school schedules, i'm lucky to get to see my wife 30 mins/day. some days we don't see each other at all. so when i'm off, we take full advantage of our time together, even moreso on those rare occasions we're both off and can actually spend an entire day together. and as far as i'm concerned, my free time is not divided into "wife (or gf before we were married) time" and "friend time" because my wife is my best friend.

we try to spend time with our other friends whenever we can, but if we choose to spend our time together alone, that's our prerogative, and anyone who doesn't understand that isn't a true friend. if they try to make us feel guilty for choosing to spend our time alone, they have no place in our lives.

[Cat]

Hmm...I may have been a tad harsh in my last message,...just that I have had friends to complained that they never see me, yet they sit around and do nothing...and when I ask they hang with me and my bf....they don't.

[McDreidel09]

I guess I'm going to be lame during my Spring Break and next school year with every other weekend.

If your friend doesn't get to see her bf during the week, why get mad at her for wanting to spend those two days out of seven with him? I know I would be pretty pissed if my friends called me lame for wanting to be with my Significant Other when I can see them at any day of the week.