I Don't Steal/Lie/Watch Porno etc. I go to church

[RavenStarr]

I wasn't sure which place to put this, as it has to do with both religion and things I hate.

Okay when a person denies stealing/lying/watching porno whatever by saying: "I don't do that, I go to church." That just makes me doubt them even more.

Seriously why tell me that. Am I suppose to believe you, just because you say you go to church?

[Nyoibo]

Respond with "Child molesters go to church too" ?

[MadMike]

I never swear, I never smoke, and I never drink!

Damn, I left my cigarettes at the bar....

[Wingates_Hellsing]

I've never, personally, heard this from anyone but that probably has to do with the fact that I've thus far been able to avoid too much moron proximity. When that changes, I'm sure I'll hate it too.

[Plaidman]

I was in the backroom stocking, while my coworker was dealing with customers. I saw a woman put an energy drink in her purse. That caused me to of course, burst out of the back room and demand for it back.

She at first denied it. She didn't do it.

Then she said oh yeah, sorry, I was just putting it in my purse so I could find my money.

Then of course she had no money, but wanted to pay for it using her food stamp card, (Which has already, been proving repeatedly to her, that she cannot buy it on those cards, which she still tried many times, screaming she always had).

She then told me that she so sorry, that I am so far from Gods grace, that I just think everyone stealing when their not. She says she goes to church everyday. (The irony of it being Sunday in the morning wasn't lost on me).

She even told me God Bless you.

I also had a crazy lady yell at me for having small candies up on the counter, and they should be with the other candy. When I told her we do that because they are easy to steal, she told me thats impossible, because people would go to hell if they stole, and since no-one wants to go to hell, no-one ever steals. It was just a myth that people steal.

[HYHYBT]

Okay when a person denies stealing/lying/watching porno whatever by saying: "I don't do that, I go to church." That just makes me doubt them even more.

I've probably done all four in the same day.

[Greenday]

I've probably done all four in the same day.

Try doing all four at the same time. Now THAT'S a challenge.

Seriously, I love when people use something completely unrelated to the argument to prove their point.

"Guns aren't dangerous because dogs can kill people too."
"I'd never cheat on a test, I'm in a frat!"
"No she's not hot, her car is pink."

[Wingates_Hellsing]

Does it count if I'm watching a pirated porno as I'm watching it and frantically explaining to the other people in the 700 club chat room that I'm not trolling them?

Also, isn't is most especially annoying when they're like an inch away from making an actually decent point but can't be bothered?

"Guns aren't particularly dangerous to own because dogs can kill people too."
"I'd never cheat on a test, I'm in respectable a frat!"
"No she's not hot, her car is pink. and therefore, a frilly female"

[Bloodsoul]

I can safely and honestly say that I have never kicked a butterfly... yet.

[smileyeagle1021]

Seriously, I love when people use something completely unrelated to the argument to prove their point.

"Guns aren't dangerous because dogs can kill people too."
"I'd never cheat on a test, I'm in a frat!"
"No she's not hot, her car is pink."

The other ones I like are
"He's not gay, he likes football" (umm, what)
"Well, since he has big hands..." (you know the rest of the saying... and the biggest I've seen didn't really have big hands).
"I can't possible be out of money, I work at (insert high paying job here)"

As far as the using church as proof of one's righteousness, when most churches teach that no person is perfect and that they don't expect a single member of the congregation to live up to standards at all times that the best we can hope for is to come damn close and ask God's forgiveness on the rest.

[blas87]

I just got that load of bullcrap recently (See: I Changed, I'm Better Than You), except, instead of "I go to church", it's just God this, God that, God this, God that.

I'm a Christian, I believe in God, and I doubt he even cares that I have premarital sex, I swear, I smoke cigarettes, I drink alcohol, and I was semi pornographic TV shows....mmm Spartacus.

[Hobbs]

You were a semi-pornographic show? :shrugs: to each his (or her) own.

Haven't seen Spartacus, are you referring to the HBO/Showtime miniseries or what-have-you?

[crazylegs]

The mere act of going to church once a week makes them as much a christian as me visiting a garage once a week makes me a mechanic.

[McDreidel09]

It's kinda like when people say that you did something good because you're a Christian.

One day, I was driving at night and I saw the person I hated the most at the time, walking. I debated whether I should pick him up and give him a ride to where-ever he needed to go or just let him walk in the dark.

I pulled over, asked him if he needed a ride, and took him to his destination. We are now good friends.

When I tell that story, people say "Wow. You're a good Christian girl for doing something like that."

I say "I am not Christian. I have no religion."

That gives them a wtf look. Half the time, people who proclaim themselves as "good Christians" say that they would not do what I did. Now,I'm not trying to bash any Christians. I am only talking about the ones who proclaim to always follow God's work and say they are a good person solely on the fact that they believe in God and that nothing else matters in being a good person.

Being Christian does not automatically make you a good person. Having no religion does not automatically make you a bad person. Also, being a Christian does not automatically make you a bad person. Having no religion does not automatically make you a good person.

[Fryk]

One time, I was in the vestibule of my church, having sex with this hot chick! While we were going at it, I saw someone's wallet that they dropped lying on the floor beside me, so I picked it up to pocket the cash. Suddenly, the pastor busts in and screams, "What on earth do you think you're doing?!" So without slowing down my pelvic thrusts, I looked him straight in the eye and said, "We're just wrestling." So I finished up, got dressed and walked out beside him, wallet full of cash in hand.


Did I get them all?