Being Ashamed Of Natural Processes

[Racket_Man]

as a guy I have no problems with periods. just a litttle more stuff during certain intimate moments and a little more cleanup (I know TMI BUT...)

I had no problems with buying feminine products. as long as I knew what brand, the size and the "flow" requirement, it was just the same as buying other items in the store. Ring um up and get me outta there. Did get a few funny looks from the female cashiers but I guess I am a modern day male

[Lace Neil Singer]

My main reason for my reply was the whole "Have a happy period" thing that your post brought to mind: http://www.always.com/period/haveahappyperiod.jsp

And of course, the rebuttal: http://wendi-aarons.blogspot.com/200...eeneysnet.html

XD

[Boozy]

I think being embarassed about asking another woman for a tampon is a perfect example of what the_std was talking about.

If there's nothing shameful about menstruation, why would you be embarrassed?

[Lace Neil Singer]

Could say the same about sex, in a way; that's a natural thing, too. So, why feel embarrassed about approaching people and asking for a spare condom? XD

[Boozy]

Could say the same about sex, in a way; that's a natural thing, too. So, why feel embarrassed about approaching people and asking for a spare condom? XD

It depends on who you ask, right?

I wouldn't walk up to a stranger and ask for a tampon, but I have no problem asking a co-worker or friend.

Most of us wouldn't ask our parents for a condom, but we'd ask a roommate.

The people the_std are talking about are those who speak in hushed tones about their periods like there's been a death in the family or something. They're the ones who can't even ask their best friend for a tampon.

[blas87]

Then again, birthing babies is normal and natural. But the process itself makes me extremely squeamish and I don't think anyone should blame people who are freaked out by that thought.

[Boozy]

Well, sure. That's fine and understandable.

But there's a difference between getting squicked out by something and being embarrassed by it. I don't care to hear the gory details of someone's labour and delivery, but there's nothing embarrassing about having a baby.

I think it's a bit crazy that most women (with particularly brutal menses) can't call into work and say "I can't come in today because I have my period." Instead, they have to say that they're feeling "under the weather" in an effort to avoid embarrassing someone.

Let me put it this way: Food poisoning involves a lot of icky fluids too, and yet most sufferers don't feel the need to lie about what's wrong with them when calling in sick.

[blas87]

Now that I have a female boss, I wouldn't hesitate to tell her it's because of my period.

But I don't get a period, at least until I switch birth control. I need a better excuse.

You do have a good point, though.

How about stuff like douches and female washes/powders?

For some reason, I find myself hiding the douches and all Summer's Eve products at the bottom of the shopping cart and always using the self scans.

[the_std]

Why do you do that, blas? I know this isn't your intention, but it ties into my OP quite nicely... Except, instead of being ashamed of having a period, it seems as though you are ashamed of having a vagina, or keeping said vagina clean. Why be ashamed of that, but not of bleeding from it?

[blas87]

Because I don't bleed from it.....well, haven't since I was 17. *Depo Provera birth control shot*

And believe you me, the last time I ever menstruated, I either sheepishly walked around Wal-Mart and scurried to the checkouts with my tampons, or asked my mum to get them for me.

I'm pretty sure I've gotten over the period thing, if it were to ever return, I doubt I'd care about buying tampons. I have had to buy pads after colposcopies and the time I had my cervix frozen, and I wasn't that worried.

The douche/wash/wipes thing....I cannot get over it. I'm not sure if it's because douching is kind of medically taboo, or if it's because I'm afraid a guy might see and think "Eww her cooch is nasty", which is the reason I douche because I think it's smelly and gross and I hate the discharge that comes out of it. I douche to get rid of secretions and to make it feel fresh. For being so medically bad for you, it sure feels good to do it.

I feel the same way about the wipes/wash/powders. I can't really explain it any further.

But I'm sure I'm not alone in the fact that a lot of girls fear they are "unfresh" or "stinky".

[the_std]

And by being ashamed of your body doing its thing and trying to keep itself clean (that's what those secretions are for, after all), it's perpetuating the stereotype. This is pretty much exactly what I was talking about. If you care so much about what guys will think of you because you don't like your body doing its natural thing, you're giving them the power to say that it's gross, that women are gross, that it shouldn't be talked about.

I'm not trying to make you feel guilty, it's just that you are an excellent example of my point.

[AdminAssistant]

I'm amazed they even sell douches - they are really not good for you. If you do have an actual bad odor/discharge from 'down there', it's probably some kind of yeast infection and you should go to a gyno. Otherwise, it's just natural. Wear cotton undies, drink mostly water, and life is good. (I've never douched, and the SO loves the way I smell and taste.)

Wet wipes are just good hygiene though, especially as a quick clean up after sex.

[blas87]

I had a yeast infection last year, but that was its own awful smell and texture.

It's no secret I am a little insecure and awkward about my body (my recent weight gain proves that alone). A lot of it is me. My bf has never complained of the smell or taste. Only complains when I don't shave it

I know it's bad for you. It just feels so good and it really makes me feel fresh and clean. I don't know why....but I just like it.

And I will agree, Admin. In fact, it doesn't even have to be Summer's Eve wipes. Even the Cottonelle wet wipes are great. I feel totally clean after using them. I don't use them every time I go potty, mostly before I leave and before bed or before/after sex, but wow they are awesome.

[XCashier]

Every time I hear a man or woman use that dreaded "I don't trust anything that bleeds for 7 days and doesn't die" quip, I seriously want to murder them. I am not kidding. I have to hold back from at least whipping a shoe at them or making a fist.

"So, you never trusted your mother?" Yes, that is sexism to the extreme, and thank you Bubba for letting me know that you're a backwards-thinking sexist git.

And you've heard women say it too?! Unbefuckinglievable. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: the only thing worse than a male chauvinist is a female male chauvinist!

[Rebel]

I think being embarassed about asking another woman for a tampon is a perfect example of what the_std was talking about.

If there's nothing shameful about menstruation, why would you be embarrassed?

It's not so much the fact that you're menstruating, it's more the fact that you're unprotected while menstruating. At that point, it's a very good chance that your underwear is ruined, even more annoying if it happens just as you get to work and you have to keep wearing them till you get home. It's more of a 'I'm not very clean right now' thing and that you've just advertised that to someone.

I was one of those lucky girls that got her first period when she was 9 (stupid hormones), so I've had more than enough time to get over any embarrassment when buying tampons and pads. Luckily I don't have to do that too often anymore (thank you Implanon!).

As for douches, I've never used them. I thought it was more of an old fashioned thing to do. But I do try to shower twice a day. I like being clean