Being Single...

[Jack T. Chance]

Long story short: I hate being single.

I hate not having that special someone to share my life with.

I hate watching my friends fall in love, get married, have kids, get divorced, start dating again, fall in love again, and get married again, all while I have NO ONE.

I hate that the only women that ever become interested in me are even MORE screwed up than I am, but once they get to know the real me, even THEY don't want to be with me... as if the so-called "normal guys" they'd rather be with would even want them.

I hate that so many of the people that have what I so desperately want don't even appreciate what they have, and take it for granted. They don't even DESERVE to be loved, yet they have someone, and I don't.

And I absolutely LOATHE all the god-damned, cliched, not-at-all helpful platitudes everyone throws at me in a futile attempt to make me feel better about the fact that I'm very probably going to die alone, unwanted and unloved.

If you're also single and hating it, make your voice heard in this thread!

And if you aren't single, no offense, but what are you even doing in this thread?

[lupo pazzesco]

I'm single.

Sometimes I hate it. Sometimes I love it.

At the same time, I feel like I'm too much of a screwed up mess for anyone to ever find attractive enough to consider girlfriend/wife/significant other material. I tend to try and cling to some of those platitudes so I don't get depressed and start thinking and believing I'm going to die a lonely, unwanted, unloved virgin, who only gets hits on by the very dregs of society. (Seriously, skeezy, smelly men on the bus, STOP proposing that we both get off at the next stop so we both can get off...)

I need a drink...

[protege]

I hate watching my friends fall in love, get married, have kids, get divorced, start dating again, fall in love again, and get married again, all while I have NO ONE.

I've always wondered...what the hell is up with that? What makes some people so damn lucky in that regard?

And I absolutely LOATHE all the god-damned, cliched, not-at-all helpful platitudes everyone throws at me in a futile attempt to make me feel better about the fact that I'm very probably going to die alone, unwanted and unloved.

Yep, that shit pisses me off too. I've always gotten the "there's someone for everyone," or that "you'll find someone." Um, are you fucking kidding me? Considering that my *last* relationship imploded 10 years ago, and nothing has happened since, apparently there *isn't* someone for everyone.

[KellyHabersham]

Count me in as one who dislikes being single................although right now, it's mostly because I don't see it as being possible to find a guy who's offbeat enough for me, but "normal" enough that he'd fit in with my family. Not to mention that the guy would have to be okay with the fact that I do NOT want to have any more kids, and he'd have to be okay with two out of my three cats being "special needs".

[Plaidman]

I hate being alone. But I do go out on a few dates every now and then. It just doesn't normally work out. I'm told I'm a real sweetheart, but they see me only as a friend. Fine. Friend Zone I get alot.

That being said bro, I do have some offense of what ya said.

I hate that the only women that ever become interested in me are even MORE screwed up than I am, but once they get to know the real me, even THEY don't want to be with me... as if the so-called "normal guys" they'd rather be with would even want them.:

Everyone has issues in life dude. Are some more crazed then others? Yeah. Likely. However, what makes you so special? You claim once they get to know the /real/ you. Maybe they don't want that? Couples are suppose to be a link of like and like. Not all people want to settle. They just may generally not like the real you, and do you honestly think it's fair to force them to be with someone they don't like or want? You may love them, but if ya did, you wouldn't be forcing them to be in a relationship they have no heart in. You also kinda come off as ... I don't know the word. But you say THEY and messed up girls, like crazy girls are LESS, and they should flock to your greatness.

I hate that so many of the people that have what I so desperately want don't even appreciate what they have, and take it for granted. They don't even DESERVE to be loved, yet they have someone, and I don't.

Yeah. I agree with that. I hate it when it APPEARS that people don't appreciate what they have.

But you are not in that relationship 24/7. Maybe said guy is slightly mad at girlfriend because she killed his cat that day. Or maybe he was forced to stop hanging with his friends, because she needed him to carry clothes around.
No such thing as a relationship where a couple is happy 24/7. That's a pipedream for fables. Each relationship has ups and downs, fights and make ups. Your with a person, not a soul mate. Everyone has their own wants and needs, and they may not always be the same as you.

Your desperate for someone. So am I. But are you willing to take their baggage? Or do you try to do nothing but praise? It comes off as full of shit. Its human nature. No-one is perfect. Not saying that you need to constantly put down a person, or try looking for fights, but don't agree with every single thing a woman tells you, in the hopes of gettting her heart. Your a person too, and you won't always agree with someone.

You have flaws. They have flaws. No-one is perfect.

How fast do you bare your soul to them? Is it within moments of saying hi?
How fast do you offer presents, like new cars to girls? Do you get mad if they accept and then ignore you, because you feel they owe you and need to talk to you at a whim?

[joe hx]

If you're also single and hating it, make your voice heard in this thread!

I'm single, and I hate it. The only girlfriend I ever had was ten years ago in high school. She left me while I was in the mental hospital. My biggest fear is that **no** girl will ever want me once she learns of all my mental illnesses.

[Rapscallion]

I hate watching my friends fall in love, get married, have kids, get divorced, start dating again, fall in love again, and get married again, all while I have NO ONE.

As a happily single bloke, I can tell you I've often been told I made the right decision by the people above. Few of them are truly happy. Many of them are arguing when you're not looking.

I cracked a good one a while back in the presence of several of my mates.

"Why is divorce so expensive? Because it's worth it!"

Only one didn't see the humour and truth in it, and that's because he has a particularly nasty, expensive divorce in process.

Grass is greener, mate.

Rapscallion

[Cats]

I'm in a different boat...I don't mind being single one bit. Of all my friends, very few of them end up happy in a relationship in the long run. Of course, that doesn't mean they weren't EVER happy in it, but a lot of the drama they rant about in the end just makes me glad I don't have to deal with it.

Is it hard being alone? Sure, sometimes. In my personal opinion, the chance of happiness is not worth the heartbreak for me. I'm okay with just going through life simply being content. And I will never be truly alone, I have my pets, my friends, my family. Just because I don't crawl into bed with a significant other every night, doesn't mean I can't love others or be loved in other ways. You are not a better or worse person by default simply because you do or don't have a romantic relationship. A ton of people I've met seem to have that idea, and I think it's utter BS.


Of course, in my case, it does help that I'm an asexual, so I don't have that sort of primal need for romantic relationships that most people do. I may find someone, and I may grow up to be a cat lady. Either way, I'm fine with it.

[BlaqueKatt]

as if the so-called "normal guys" they'd rather be with would even want them.

They don't even DESERVE to be loved, yet they have someone, and I don't.

these two lines say quite a bit.....just wondering who died and made you judge of all humanity?

there have been times in the 6 years my husband and I have been together that due to conflicting schedules we didn't see each other at all-so yup no time to appreciate what the other did, and we took each other for granted-yet without knowing anything else about us or our relationship- you mighty judge of humanity have decided neither of us DESERVE to be loved. I find that to be highly offensive.

Guess what for 3 years my husband was working full time and going to school full time-yup he took me for granted-he was busy, I accepted that, school was important to him, and because I loved him I accepted that I had to let him do what he needed to to be happy. Now I'm busy with my full time job and various charity work-he accepts that I'm busy-but according to you he should leave me because "ZOMG I'm not spending every waking moment singing his praises"

Nope he understands that my charity work is important to me just as his schooling was important to him-he loves me not despite what I do, but because of it. He loves being able to brag about how his wife couldn't make the company gathering because "sorry she's busy raising money to fight leukemia/volunteering at the local soup kitchen feeding the homeless."

Yes he'd rather I didn't devote so much of my time to helping others, but also knows that limiting me would make me very very unhappy-love is selfless not selfish-keeping me at home with him would be very selfish.

[Hobbs]

And if you aren't single, no offense, but what are you even doing in this thread?

...rubbing it in?

Seriously, I've been single for most my life, never had a gf in high school, and my first two relationships have been...unique. My newest one, I hope, will at least end up better than the others...and at the most lead to something more.

I have a friend who's perfectly fine being single, and is in fact the best friend of my current gf. We joke about needing to get her a man now, but she doesn't mind, really. I don't think she's asexual though, since she does have some...interests.

[Greenday]

One of the main reasons I hate being single is because all of my friends who have boyfriends or girlfriends ONLY do stuff with their boyfriends or girlfriends leaving me with few people to hang out with.

It also sucks because I graduate in six days and after college, it's going to be a lot harder to meet people.

[Nyoibo]

I've never been in a relationship, hell I've never even been on a date, I just don't seem to be anyones type, and yeah I'm sick of the whole "you'll find someone" or "There's someone out there for you". The onther thing I hate is always ending up as the friend and then being the one they talk to about their relationships with and all the while wanting to scream at them "Stop bitching, you have someone, stop reminding me and rubbing it in my face"

And of course just when I've pretty much got to the point where it's not bothering me again someone comes along to fan the spark of hope and then douses it again.

[MadMike]

There are much worse things than being single.

Like being married.

[Nyoibo]

I'd like to try that and compare for myself.

[Plaidman]

There are much worse things than being single.

Like being married.

Ouch dude... not something us enternally single people wanna hear you know.

Alot of us would murder to be with a wife and/or husband.