"You Make More Money Than I Do, So Shut Up!"

[blas87]

Bf and I went to a friend's birthday party, just a backyard picnic and beer type of thing, and we were socializing with our pals.

Most of them greeted me with "Wow, you got a day off blas? Yay!" and "Holy shit, that place lets you have time off?" "How's overtime going, hyuck hyuck!"

Then one of them said "So you must be really racking in the dough if you're working there, since it's the biggest factory in this area?"

I responded that I actually don't make that much, and the reason I get paid extra is because of my shift bonus for working nights, and overtime is time and a half pay after 40 hours worked. So working 6-12 (or more) hours of overtime a week, that may seem like a lot, but it really isn't. Especially when the higher-ups decide that so much overtime puts us so far ahead that they can skimp on our bonuses.

Someone said "Well, you make way more than I do an hour, so why don't you just quit complaining?"

It's just the same as the threads I've made before on how I wish people would stop with "You should be happy you have a job!" when we don't get a bonus or get a really small one compared to how hard we've worked, or when overtime is used as punishment for not making goals and a constant threat, like "If you guys don't get our delivery time back on track, you'll be spending every weekend here all summer!" or when they take away perks and benefits or lower our break times.

Sure, I make enough money to be able to live alone and keep gas in the car and food in the fridge. I'd still like to have a 40 hour work week and not always be so tired and angry. I wish I could have time off like everyone else has, and not have to work every other freaking Friday or Saturday. I hate having to skimp on things I enjoy because I have to work. It's summer time and I have to sleep all day so I can work every night.

Overtime isn't even worth it anymore. I have lost so much time with family and friends and my bf. I hardly get any time to just sit around and chill out alone. When I AM off of work, I'm antsy and bitchy and tired.

So you shut the fuck up. Wanna trade jobs?

*I don't mean you as in anyone here, I mean it towards the person who said that to me*

[draggar]

I can relate - long work weeks can wear you down. I used to work 60+ hour work weeks in a new store as the only tech (mon-sat 10-8 (or earlier / later as needed). Sure, the paychecks were nice but I'd get up, go to work, come home, go to bed. I never had any time to do anything with my wife because Sundays were filled with getting things done around the house.

[Rageaholic]

I don't even have a job, and I would never say that to anyone, ever. From what I read on CS and heard from family members, jobs can be stressful, no matter how much money you make. If it's causing you so much stress that it's interfering with your life, than how much money you make is a moot point. Why can't people get in through their head that just because someone has something (be it more money, a college education, a job period), they aren't without their problems?

[HYHYBT]

Complaints tend to look whiny if you're worse off than the one doing the complaining... or just *think* you are. But that's no reason for them to be rude about it.

And yeah, the problem with overtime (or often, with salaried positions for that matter) is that, while you may be bringing in more money, you don't get to enjoy your life. It's great if it comes now and then, or if it's the only way to keep the lights on, fridge stocked, etc., but too much and your life becomes only your work, and for most jobs and most people, that's too much!

[jackfaire]

That's actually the one thing I love about my job and level of income. I don't make as much as people I went to college with and I am an hourly employee but my job ends when the whistle blows so to speak there is no taking my work home or having to do mandatory overtime.

[smileyeagle1021]

I actually have the opposite problem, I don't have the people who will try to complain about how muchg I make so shut up... I don't even complain too much about it (you know, beyond on the days that I work both my jobs answering truthfully "I'm tired beyond belief, I'm doing both jobs today" to the question "how are you doing"), yet everyone keeps on going on me about how this is terrible that I'd put myself through all this, blah blah blah.

I have to keep reminding them that it is because I work two jobs that I am able to afford to take a week vacation during the summer, it is because I work two jobs during the summer than I can afford to go to school full time during the winter and cut back my hours at work, it's because I work two jobs that I can afford to do a lot of what I want to do. Yes, it sucks royally, but I know until I get that degree and can get a better job, this is the price I will have to pay.

[Racket_Man]

I kinda get that from my Ex and her "bf". except mine is "WELLL YOU have a job and everything!!!!" and they are BOTH on SS Disability so their income is very limtited. most of the time they say this when they feel I should be spending all of my extra income (and then some) on my daughter and her young son. I am all for helping out but I too am on somewhat of a limited income.

Yes I HAVE a job (one that I like too the pay ain't great but.....) but that does NOT mean I have an overflowing bank account or wads of cash hanging out of my pocket. I DO have expensive job related expenses such as car insurnace (commercial insurance), car repairs , car maintienace (these 2 have totaled out at AROUND $3k in the last 8 months) NONE of which my comapny reimburses me for (all out of pocket). then there is my share of the household expenses such as my cell phone, car payment, cable, internet access, food utiilities, putting a little aside for my vacation to see my alling Mother, etc.

I live very fugally (sp). Yes I would like to have the $$$$ to get a 50" HD TV, a tricked out fully loaded PC, top of the line home theater ssytem with Blu-Ray player, a very high speed internet connection, a brand new "right off of the factory floor" car, but that is not happening. heck with the way things are going I AM going to have to find another car in the medium term future.

[Boozy]

This is why it's not a good idea to discuss money with friends.

No one knows how much I or my husband make, and we don't generally discuss our spending habits with others outside of a few vague comments.

I have friends from all walks of life, and it just makes things easier. If I'm not complaining about the cost of those car repairs, then my rich friends don't feel bad telling me about their trip to Europe. If I'm not yapping about our new car, then my poor friends don't start feeling resentful.

[protege]

I kinda get that from my Ex and her "bf". except mine is "WELLL YOU have a job and everything!!!!" and they are BOTH on SS Disability so their income is very limtited.

I get that shit from my brother...who is still unemployed, and his benefits ran out awhile back. My reply? "So what's your point?" Brief, and spot-on. Sorry, but I'm not going to feel guilty because I work hard for what I have. I've had a job, since I started out as a newspaper carrier when I was 9 or 10. I've always been working, and had to even sacrifice things in order to get ahead. For example, there were several summers that I didn't go on vacation with the rest of the family--I was either working, or had school.

Yes I HAVE a job (one that I like too the pay ain't great but.....) but that does NOT mean I have an overflowing bank account or wads of cash hanging out of my pocket.

I hear ya on that one. Just because someone works, doesn't mean they have a crapload of cash. I'm not poor, but I'm not Donald Trump either. My home expenses--mortgage and utilities--eat up a huge percentage of pay every month. What's left goes toward car payments, insurance, groceries, and kitty bills. If there's anything left, it goes into my retirement. Sure, I enjoy my model-building hobbies, and maintain a second car...but I don't do any of that until the necessities are paid for first.

I live very fugally (sp). Yes I would like to have the $$$$ to get a 50" HD TV, a tricked out fully loaded PC, top of the line home theater ssytem with Blu-Ray player, a very high speed internet connection, a brand new "right off of the factory floor" car, but that is not happening. heck with the way things are going I AM going to have to find another car in the medium term future.

You and me too!I actually had people give me shit because I *refused* to spend a grand on a TV. Why the hell would I do that? Sure, it would be nice to have a bigger screen, but considering that I'm not home much, why bother? A 27-inch CRT-style TV is good enough. Plus, it's already paid for. I don't have much of a home-theater system--a DVD/VHS combo is it. No fancy speakers, no surround sound, nada.

Also along those lines, I couldn't see the need for a super-high-speed 'net connection either. Why would I spend twice what I pay for now...and it won't be any faster on my ancient computers? Computers, which would be considered elderly by now. One I actually built, the others...were refurbished or repaired with used parts. None are top-of-the-line.

I got lucky with my cars. The MG was free. Rebuilding and restoring it was not Seriously though, I'm sure most people think that I'm made of money because I own it. Unlike some people, I didn't do it all at once. My goal was, to get the car running...and then finish it myself. That's why the rear seat isn't fitted, there aren't any carpets up front, and the bumpers still need rechromed. While I was at it, I also wanted to learn how to fix it

The daily-driver Corolla isn't top-of-the-line either. I couldn't see paying a few grand more for an S or LE...unless I *really* wanted that body kit or plastic "wood" trim on the dashboard. Besides, the CE I ended up with came with the five-speed I wanted. When I bought it, I had to do some creative financing. Because up until then, I'd saved most of what I made, an interesting idea came to light--why not sell off some investments, trade in the old heap, and finance the rest? After some calculations, I found out...that the resulting payment was about *half* of what the car usually went for! That, and it's mostly paid for after 3 years!

If you can't tell, I'm a bit frugal myself. Watching your parents struggle to pay bills during your entire childhood will do that, I guess. I also saw how often they fought over money, and the toll it took on my dad for working multiple jobs all those years. Another learning experience in other words--I was determined not to repeat their mistakes.

[blas87]

I'm pretty frugal myself, but when I do get bonuses or checks with lots of overtime, I do spoil myself a bit. I have been saving for a car, though.

The way I figure, my friends may get paid less than me, but they have the most desireable hours to work and never have to work overtime or on weekends, so they need to shove it. I get paid extra to work a shift that no one wants to work, and time and a half to always have to be there. It sucks, but I'll take it. Guess what? If I went to 1st shift, I'd lose $180 a month (and that was before my raise this year, I'll bet it's over $200 a month now).

So whenever people bitch "Why don't you switch to a different shift?" when I get sleepy during the afternoons on Fridays or Saturdays, I'll snap back "Are you going to pay to make up for what I'd lose if I went to a better shift?"

[Racket_Man]

the other really interesting thing is that during my marriage I aquired the nickname "Scrooge". mainly because I wanted to put money back for the proverbial "rainy day". but my Ex listened to her "friends" when they said "OH that money is YOURS too. WHY not spend it???" and "OH it is your money too so it is OK for you to go into your hubby's wallet/joint checking account and spend that money that is YOURS too".

the Funny thing is, is that once Ex left (both times) shortly thereafter I managed to accumulate a tidy sum of cash savings even though I had the exact same bills (rent phone utilities etc.), still bought food and gas and the like.

while we were together I got serious and created a budget worksheet and a checking account reconcilation spreadsheet. it was then I found out where all of the money was going. numerious checks I did not know about, ATM withdrawls, lunches being bought, etc. almost every day I was calling the bank's automated account line to check the status of the account and to see what checks she lied about or the differing amounts she told me to record.

once she left me it became clear she really did not know how to manage HER money or to budget. her and her "BF" now rely heavily on payday loans whilst I on the other hand manage my finances responcibly.

[Red Panda]

Bf and I went to a friend's birthday party, just a backyard picnic and beer type of thing, and we were socializing with our pals.

Most of them greeted me with "Wow, you got a day off blas? Yay!" and "Holy shit, that place lets you have time off?" "How's overtime going, hyuck hyuck!"

Then one of them said "So you must be really racking in the dough if you're working there, since it's the biggest factory in this area?"

Learn to read between the lines. They are all jelous that you have a high paying job. I don't get why so many people on this site get upset when they get a compliment that isn't someone straight out stating what they feel.

[blas87]

People could always learn to compliment instead of insult to compliment or make it seem like they are being smartassed or insulting you.

I don't have a high paying job. I may make a dollar or two more than a lot of my friends simply because of the shift that I work, and I may bring in more every other week because of the overtime that I do.

[Red Panda]

How is saying you work hard and make alot of money an insult? People don't usually say "You make a lot of money and work hard; I am impressed" because they are not robots and it is an awkward way to talk. A normal conversation usually goes something like


Them: "Holy shit, that place lets you have time off? "How's overtime going?"

You: Its rough you know, I get tired but thats the way things are. How is your job?"

Then they will probably agree and the conversation will move on. You have expressed some displeasure with the overtime without ranting about it and moved the conversation to a new subject so you don't even have to discuss your job anymore. There is a good chance that nobody will escelate the conversation because you have not given them a reason to by stating how horrible it is. When people inquire how you are doing in casual conversation they rarely want all the details and won't harp on any one thing unless you lead them to.

[blas87]

Well, it's not like I engage the cashier at the gas station or strangers at the mall about how upset I am at my job, I can understand what you mean that people don't want to hear your entire lately life story when they ask how you are, but I just can't see disguising a compliment as a joke or insult.