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  • Alzheimer's

    Yep, I fucking hate it.

    Some of you know that my grandmother's mind is failing. She simply has no short-term memory left. Just last Sunday, she must have asked me about 5,000 times if I'd had dinner already. Never mind that she was *with* me at the time. I'm not mad at her by *any* means. It's not her fault! She can't help it, and at times, not being able to remember things scares the hell out of her.

    What pisses me off, is that there's nothing I can do about it. It's not like the car in that I can fix it, or modify it. I have to tolerate it, and know that it's *not* going to go away. It's very painful to watch what this is doing to her. It's been hard for her this past year--she's had to give up driving (due to failing vision), move into an assisted-living place, lost her independence, and has had to deal with depression.

    Why did this all had to happen seemingly at once? Up until now, she did her own thing. She drove to church, took care of just about everyone, played cards once a week with friends, cooked the best meals ever (and why I've put on weight over the past 30 years, hehe). Throw in that she was nearly killed in a 1994 auto accident, and I just have to ask...WTF?

  • #2
    I totally know where you're coming from. I don't think Dad had Alzheimer's, but he did have some pretty bad dementia going on.
    Fortunately for us all, he chose to pretty much accept it and was pretty tranquil, really. Mom probably had a worse time than he did, as she was losing her life partner before he even died. She'd still try and get him to do stuff that he used to do and just didn't have the ability to anymore and frankly put him in danger a few times. Us kids were not at all amused with her.

    Sucks getting old.

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    • #3
      I watched my grandmother lose her ability to do things she'd loved doing. It hurts, it hurts so badly.

      The last week of her life - seeing her like that - all I could do was sit with her and hold her hand, and try not to cry until I'd left the room.

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      • #4
        Alzheimer's is one of the scariest things in the world to me. If your mind is gone, is it still you inside? I'm not sure the answer is yes, and I really am terrified of it.

        Because of that, I also try to pay attention to what research is going on. Contact Amgen. They make a drug called Enbrel. Amgen has found an off-label use for Enbrel: As an Alzheimer's fighter.

        The early results for this use are astounding, and show signs of being able to reverse the effects of Alzheimer's totally. They're still in early testing, and might not be ready to move forward to the next phase of trials, but asking can at least let you feel like you're doing something.

        I hope this drug's promise carries through, and I hope your grandmother is one of the people who can benefit.

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        • #5
          My grandpa has Alzheimer's. The worst thing about it, for the family at least, is seeing him turn into an angry, violent person. He was always the sweetest, most gentle person before his illness.

          The doctors say that this is common in the early stages, and it will pass as the disease progresses. But that's even worse for us - because then the grandpa I know will be gone entirely.

          My other grandfather died of lung cancer. It hurt him terribly, and that hurt us, but it was still better than this, somehow. I hope you all understand what I mean when I say that.

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          • #6
            Alzheimer's is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Watching my dad go through it has been difficult, to say the least. The good news is, he responds well to medication, so he's still able to lead a relatively normal life. He was forced to retire early from a job he loved though which was not easy for him. My step-mom takes good care of him though and keeps him occupied enough that he doesn't have time to sit around the house and mope. The grand kids keep him busy too.

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            • #7
              My maternal grandmother died from Alzheimer's. Vile, vile disease.
              ~ The American way is to barge in with a bunch of weapons, kill indiscriminately, and satisfy the pure blood lust for revenge. All in the name of Freedom, Apple Pie, and Jesus. - AdminAssistant ~

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              • #8
                Big hugs to eveyone who's lost or losing a loved one to Alzheimer's. I agree, it's horrible, I'd rather have cancer. Thank you for the info on Enbrel, Pedersen, it looks very promising.

                My grandmother had a long battle with senile dementia. It was awful, watching her go, bit by bit, until there was nothing left. I still remember the last word I heard her say: Johnnycake. It was her nickname for my son.
                People behave as if they were actors in their own reality show. -- Panacea
                If you're gonna be one of the people who say it's time to make America great again, stop being one of the reasons America isn't great right now. --Jester

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Pedersen View Post
                  Alzheimer's is one of the scariest things in the world to me. If your mind is gone, is it still you inside? I'm not sure the answer is yes, and I really am terrified of it.
                  I don't know, regarding Alzheimer's. But for depression, schizotypal disorder, bipolar and autism, I can give a firm 'yes'. At least in one case of each - me, and family/friends.

                  But it's a really scary 'yes'. It's you inside, but you're not in control. You have emotions, though patterns and behaviours which are out of control, and the you that is inside can feel - or be - helpless.

                  Recovery/treatment is the process of gaining control. Some of it must be medication: if you don't have the neurochemicals or receptors for happiness, your brain and body literally cannot be happy. (That's what makes depression so horrible, and why 'cheer up' is absolutely useless advice.)

                  But some of it is the mental equivalent of physiotherapy. If you've not had happiness neurochemicals for the last ten years - or worse, since birth - you just don't know how to be happy. It's like relearning how to walk, and just as difficult.


                  I digress.

                  For Alzheimers - I don't know. But for certain other mental illnesses, it's a 'yes' but it's an ugly and frightening yes.

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                  • #10
                    My great-aunt suffered from this disease as well. She kept mixing up my sister and me, asking where Pookie, her cat, was, (we had to give him away when we put her in the nursing home) and had no idea who my dad was and even tried to flirt with him. (That was an awkward moment.) When she died, I couldn't attend her funeral because I was in the hospital at the time. But, I understand what you're going through. It's painful seeing someone you love drift out of reality.
                    They keep on coming, they keep on coming, they keep on coming into my lane.
                    And they annoy me, and they confuse me, it's a wonder that I'm still sane!

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                    • #11
                      She's had some strange thoughts recently. When I saw her 2 weeks ago, she kept asking me to drive her home, where Abby (her husband, Albert) was, and was wondering where Kitty was hiding. She was crushed when I told her that the house was sold in 2006, Grandpa died roughly 20 years ago, and Kitty (aka the cat) had died back in October.

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                      • #12
                        Count me in as one who hates Alzheimer's. It runs in my family. Actually, it practically gallops. My great-grandmother died from it. We suspect her uncle also had it. One of her sons has it and one of her daughters recently lost her battle with it. My mom's cousin now has it. We suspect my aunt may have it but it's too soon to tell...just some odd behaviors. It scares me to death.

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