Where Did That Come From?!

[blas87]

I don't know what it is about people. I really don't. It seems a great deal of people I know or talk to regularly need to take etiquette and brain to mouth filter classes, and learn some halfway decent social skills, or just shut the hell up and don't even talk.

Why is it you can just say something like "I miss my brother, I haven't seen him in a month, we're doing something later today," and you get back a "A MONTH? I only get to see my sister once, MAYBE twice a year! What the hell are you going to do if you ever make good on that threat of yours to move to Arizona? What if your brother moves away? Oh wait, or are you going to spend the rest of your life in Farmville Wisconsin because you don't want to be away from your faaaammmillllyyy? Oh wait, I forgot, you probably aren't going to leave anyway because you hate change!"

What. The. Fuck.

[telecom_goddess]

wow someone forgot their happy pill....

[blas87]

And the other half of this thread is, if you are ever in your own crappy mood or bad day and you say something that is not even close to that level of being rude or presumptuous, you get a verbal lashing that makes your eyeballs double in size every sentence they fire back at you.

Or, if you understandably get upset with such verbal diahrrea and say something back in your own defense, you get a verbal smackdown anyway.

[HYHYBT]

There's something *wrong* now with wanting to be around your family and spend time with them?

[telecom_goddess]

There's something *wrong* now with wanting to be around your family and spend time with them?

And there is something wrong with wanting to move to a warmer climate like Arizona apparently . I've threatened to move to Arizona myself cause the winters here are getting unreal. I am sick of the cold and snow is pretty much a given at some point. If I could winter there and summer here I would do it in a heartbeat.

[christopher]

Some people are just asses. They are stuck in their own special world. I too would like to see my family but at this time it isn't possible as I live 2000+ miles away from them. I'm not going to flip out on someone who has a legitimate complaint. Some people should have been spanked more as kids.

[XCashier]

And there is something wrong with wanting to move to a warmer climate like Arizona apparently . I've threatened to move to Arizona myself cause the winters here are getting unreal.

Heh. We moved to Oregon from Arizona because we were sick of the heat! Guess the grass really is greener on the other side...

If I could winter there and summer here I would do it in a heartbeat.

I'd consider that arrangement too. (Though not Phoenix, the pollution and the water are horrible there. Flagstaff or Prescott, maybe.)

Back OT, I agree with Blas, some people really do need to change their brain-to-mouth filter. Or at the very least, learn manners and tact. Someone making a statement is no reason to jump down their throats.

[telecom_goddess]

Heh. We moved to Oregon from Arizona because we were sick of the heat! Guess the grass really is greener on the other side...

I'd consider that arrangement too. (Though not Phoenix, the pollution and the water are horrible there. Flagstaff or Prescott, maybe.)

How funny.......what about Tucson? I really don't know the state at all

[MaggieTheCat]

It's like when you complain about something that may be relatively trivial in the long-run, and someone else tells you to shut up and just be fortunate that things aren't worse because they sure could be. Like if I say I've got a cold and I haven't been feeling well, and someone barks back, "Well just be glad that you're not one of the millions of people who are starving in Africa who have uncurable diseases, no food, and contaminated drinking water! You shouldn't complain, it could be a lot worse!"

And there is something wrong with wanting to move to a warmer climate like Arizona apparently .

When I moved away from my hometown in Wisconsin (where I was born and lived for 25 years) to Texas, my grandmother told my mother that I was a horrible person for wanting to move away from my hometown, my family, and my "heritage." I was moving to be with the man I love, who is now my husband, but apparently that didn't matter.

[XCashier]

How funny.......what about Tucson? I really don't know the state at all

Tucson isn't quite so bad as Phoenix, but as the second-largest city in the state, it's still a bit polluted. (Don't recall how the water is.)

[aurelemsrealm]

What I've found is that few people really sympathize with others who may be having a bad time. At least, sometimes when I grumble or gripe about something on my mind, some people try to tell me how it's not as bad as I'm making it sound, I should just get over it because it could always be worse, or some other form of "it's not that big of a deal so it really doesn't matter anyway." Who is anyone else to tell me when I should be annoyed or what should annoy me? It's not like any of these people walk in my shoes. They have no right to dismiss my complaints just because they see it differently. They can always just walk away and ignore the rest of it because I'm most likely just venting. At least then I know how I rate with them, and won't make the mistake of "boring" them with my problems. Likewise, I'll also know not to bother offering any moral support where I get none when I need it.

[HYHYBT]

Well, that depends: do you believe that everyone who offers ways things could be worse or whatever is unsympathetic or trying to tell you it doesn't matter or whatever? If so, that's not true. It may not help *you,* but it's a very common way to express sympathy, or possibly to try to lighten your mood a bit.

Of course, you may well know that already and allow for that; if so, I apologize, as it's hard to tell from your post. "You should just get over it" is different, but "hey, it could be worse" or bringing up the good side, if any, of your situation are at least not necessarily unkind.

[aurelemsrealm]

It is true that a high level of annoyance does sometimes make everyone else seem less sympathetic than they might really be. I see what you mean. When you're close to the problem, it always seems more magnified because emotions are running high.

I should note that particular observation was made after work which always stresses me out because I work in a convenience store. I really do try not to let it get to me, but it does, especially when I'm stuck working a shift by myself or working with one of the lazy/whiney coworkers. I'm just so tired of working those kinds of jobs that it's gotten ridiculous.

I really do try to keep a positive outlook because I know working there is not going to be a permanent issue. I'm in school, and well on my way to earning a bachelor's degree in computer science and accounting. I could also spend another year in school if I wanted to finish the bachelor's degree in journalism and mass communications that I started, but never finished my first time through college.

I guess what my issue is more a matter of dealing with all the demands on me between family, school, and work. Family and school are places I want to focus on because I do consider them important. Work is just something I have to do for a paycheck. As you can tell, I've got a lot on my mind. All of my frustrations always come back to striking a balance in life which I don't have. It just seems like someone is always wanting something, and the demands never end.

I better stop as I've gone too deep into it already, and I have other things to do.

[Ree]

Like I have often said, while the old saying about crying over having no shoes until meeting someone with no feet is true, the fact remains that the person still has no shoes and their damn feet are cold, so they have every right to complain about that.

It bugs me when people try to negate the complaints of others.

[Rageaholic]

What a bunch of assholes. I can't stand overly angsty people, especially those who take offense at the drop of a hat. They need to realize that not everything is done to spite them and stop acting like you slaughtered their cat when you say hello.

As for the "others have it worse" fallacy, I have [URL = http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AppealToWorseProblems]THIS [/URL] to say.