my mom's attitude towards finances

[KellyHabersham]

Something I've never quite understood is the way my mom seems to look at my financial situation. She is well aware that the library job does NOT pay enough to cover all expenses, pays too much for me to get on any sort of government assistance, and that I can't just pick up extra hours there whenever I want to.

However, now that I'll be down to just that job by next week, she seems to be going back to that mindset of thinking of my library salary should be adequate, and I shouldn't need any additional help. Granted, I AM planning to move back in with her at the end of December, but still.......even if I'm able to pick up extra hours in the library system, I'm limited to 30 a week.

(sorry if this isnt making sense, I'm just really concerned because my mom and I had a lot of nasty fights the last time I had to depend on her for financial help, because she insisted that I was "nickeling and diming" my money away.)

[BlaqueKatt]

Something I've never quite understood is the way my mom seems to look at my financial situation.<snip? my mom and I had a lot of nasty fights the last time I had to depend on her for financial help, because she insisted that I was "nickeling and diming" my money away.)

can you make a list of all your monthly expenses and when she brings it up say something like "Hey can you help me work on a budget, I'd really appreciate your input on this, see if you can see something that I'm overlooking?"(note: you don't have to mean it)

That way it's in black and white what your money she thinks you're "wasting" is going for and how much you actually don't have. And it's non-confrontational, you're asking for her help/opinion, and rather than having to defend yourself against accusations, you're making her an ally(and showing her you think she's a help more than just financially-moms like to feel needed)

My list would look like(not accurate amounts except my rent :
Rent-$400
Food-$150
Collection agency-$100
Phone-$50
Internet-$40
Electric-$20
Credit card-$20
Laundry-$20
--------------------
total expenditures-$800/month
Income-1200/month

yours can have
Gas, insurance, maintenance for car, etc

[KellyHabersham]

A great idea that is........mainly what might work is to write down the average amount I make per month, X amount HAS to go towards rent and I have Y amount of money left for everything else. I also might point out (tactfully, of course) that it's not that easy to just pick up extra hours at the library.......although I'm hoping that I'll be to do so, even if I have to travel to another library branch.