People who bitch about their girlfriend/boyfriend/wife/husband.

[linguist]

there's a subtle but important distinction that plaidman seems to be missing. there's a difference between bitching about your significant other and bitching about your significant other's behaviors. i love my wife with my whole being, but sometimes she does things that drive me crazy, just as i sometimes do things that drive her crazy. yes, she has flaws, and yes, i accepted them when we got together. however, that acceptance doesn't negate my right to complain about them from time to time. i accept that sometimes at my job unreasonable things are going to be expected of me by my managers and by customers, but i'm still going to complain when that happens. doesn't mean i love my job any less, just as complaining about my wife's behaviors doesn't mean i love her any less.

[Andara Bledin]

You can say no to someone asking you out. Though I'm sure only a few select of you has heard that uttered to you, or even saying no to those that ask you out.

This is pure fantasy. I can count the number of times I've actually been asked out on one hand and have digits left over. I can't count the number of times I've been rejected even including both hands and both feet. My first husband was also my first boyfriend. The guy I've been with for the last decade is my second boyfriend.

Don't confuse those who can maintain a cheery outlook in the face of rejection for those who have not had to deal with it in the first place. I only personally know a few of the latter, and they tend to be the most shallow people in existence and not the same caliber that you tend to find here.

Otherwise, all I can add is that your assumption as to the why of people venting about their others seems to be very far from the mark of where truth and reality really lie.

As many people and I have mentioned, you can't just bottle it up when you're upset. Different people handle minor issues in different ways. Some log in to Call of Duty and frag a bunch of strangers. Some write poetry or music. Some go to the gym and exercise (exorcise? ) their frustrations out. And some people vent.

The fact that the situation a person is in is voluntary or not is completely irrelevant. Separating things like work and weather and relationships is meaningless. It's a man-made dividing line for something that is, at heart, only a semi-rational response.

I'm not entirely rational about matters of the heart and I sincerely doubt that you are, either. I doubt anyone that isn't a sociopath can be.

That said, there is a difference between letting off steam and bitching for the sake of bitching.

^-.-^

[Eisa]

First of all, I am sorry that someone sent you something like that, Plaid, that's awful. And very uncalled-for.

Secondly, I basically agree with linguist and Kimmik. As with all things, moderation is key. Bitching about some of your SO's behaviors you find annoying? Perfectly ok, although if you're doing it all the time, you might want to take a look at why you're in the relationship. Bitching about your SO him/herself? Pretty much not ok, and again you should take a look at why you're in the relationship.

As for "never being told no" or whatever...I actually have pretty much never been officially "asked out." I have had relationships and am in one now, but NONE of them started with "would you like to go out with me?" I never got one bf, gf, or date request in high school. Or in college now, from people in college. I feel very lucky to have such a wonderful person love me now, but it's DEFINITELY not like people have been knocking down my door, begging to date me.

[telecom_goddess]

I think whoever sent that email is being extremely immature and they are not fucking helping with this debate at all.....cause Plaid is just getting more and more upset and that doesn't help anything.

Plaid...while I don't agree with your argument ...sorry about that....I empathize with you and admire that you do have a conviction and a belief you aren't straying from no matter what. I have those too about other things and get crap for it all the time so I understand.

I think on this topic we are going to have to agree to disagree with him....

[Peppergirl]

I am appalled and disgusted, Plaid.

Like Greenday said, things get pretty heated around here - but I'm also shocked that anyone would be that big of a douchebag.

[Plaidman]

It's fine.

Don't worry about it.

I'm sorry I overreacted. Likely a troll here anyway.

In anycase, I've dealt with worst insults before. Though some did kinda sting.

[HYHYBT]

...Hubby left the damn seat up again, or that omg for the hundredth time put the butter away...

Sorry to throw in an aside, but I *have* to ask: what's wrong with putting the butter away?

I can count the number of times I've actually been asked out on one hand and have digits left over.

I can count all the times I've been asked out on one hand and have five left

[LCK78]

Are you telling us that one of our members harassed you off the site with a nasty email? I'm assuming it was anonymous.

I find that disgusting, and very disappointing.

I had thought our members were more mature than that.

This would be assuming we have mature members all around and that no one would think to take it to that low a level. But its evident that this is not true.
If anyone is a troll, Plaidman it is the person that sent you this email and that he or she knew it bothered you when you mentioned it here.
However, now that it is known perhaps it is a reminder for people to read everything and try and check previous posts.
Not going to further debate but as members say add my two cents.

[Kimmik]

Sorry to throw in an aside, but I *have* to ask: what's wrong with putting the butter away?

I can count all the times I've been asked out on one hand and have five left

No it is the fact that he forgets to put it away lol... nothing like waking up and wanting toast to find that you now have a tub of liquid margarine. margarine separates in a really nasty fashion.. but as a solution I have gone back to using real butter, so it is not so bad now.

[blas87]

If it makes you feel better, my bf (actually, his entire family) shuts the toilet lid and leaves it that way, even if he's gone #2. Yeah, now it can't air out. At his house, every toilet is always shut.

You can always tell if he's in the bathroom, because you'll hear a flush and a violent SLAM! There goes the lid down.

Both bother me to no end. When he comes over here, I yell at him for shutting the entire thing. The toilet NEEDS to be open to air out.

[guywithashovel]

I've never considered the concept of leaving the toilet open so it can air out. I've always closed it after using it because I thought that was the neat thing to do.

[Andara Bledin]

nothing like waking up and wanting toast to find that you now have a tub of liquid margarine. margarine separates in a really nasty fashion.. but as a solution I have gone back to using real butter, so it is not so bad now.

Yeah, margarine is pretty disgusting. Nothing like butter at all.

I prefer my butter out because there's nothing like wanting toast to find that your butter is a solid mass and you have to shave off bits to get it to melt properly.

I've never considered the concept of leaving the toilet open so it can air out. I've always closed it after using it because I thought that was the neat thing to do.

Beds are like that, too. You should leave your bed covers turned down in the morning to let the bed air.

^-.-^

[blas87]

Perhaps I am just an odd duck but as long as the toilet is regularly cleaned, it should look "neat" with the lid open in its regular appearance and glory.

It makes me freak that the smells are being trapped in the toilet and the bathroom will smell for longer if you just close it all the way. Leave it open, turn on the fan, spray some air freshener, good to go.

But I'm also the type of person who immediately pulls the shower curtains out of the shower when I'm done, turns on the fan right after a shower, and never shuts the bathroom door when I'm showering (hey, I live alone!).

[telecom_goddess]

If it makes you feel better, my bf (actually, his entire family) shuts the toilet lid and leaves it that way, even if he's gone #2. Yeah, now it can't air out. At his house, every toilet is always shut.

You can always tell if he's in the bathroom, because you'll hear a flush and a violent SLAM! There goes the lid down.

Both bother me to no end. When he comes over here, I yell at him for shutting the entire thing. The toilet NEEDS to be open to air out.

I beg to differ it needs to be shut at all times, that's the way it is at my house. Having it open makes the room smell...and it looks bad....plus why do you think they make those lid covers? so we can see the underside of it all the time? Not that *I* have one on mine but the kids do on theirs and it looks way better when it's shut.

[guywithashovel]

Wow, talk about a thread hijack.

I'm actually a little bit like you, blas. I usually leave the bathroom door cracked open while I shower (though not all the way open). I usually crack the window open, too, as long as it's not excessively cold outside.

As for the smells getting trapped in the toilet, maybe one of those toilet bowl fresheners would work?