Petty, petty, petty

[MaggieTheCat]

I have a friend on Facebook, we'll call her D. D is married and has a little boy, and she just found out that she's pregnant again and announced it on Facebook. This is happy news for her and her husband as they want a family and more kids.

So people are commenting on her announcement and congratulating her, and one of her friends asks when she's due. D says a date in September. Her friend replies, "Gee, nice timing." D says, "yeah...sorry about that." Her friend says, "Yeah, whatever, you can't control it....oh, and congrats...we're really happy for you..."

I really wanted to respond with something like, "You don't need to lie when you're obviously not happy at all, but you could at least not say anything so you don't spoil the mood." I don't know what her deal is, but I'm guessing she has some other big event going on right around D's due date, either she's getting married or having a baby herself and is upset that D will be due at the same time and may take some of the attention.

Seriously, could you be any more petty? What does she expect, all of her friends to stop having sex or go on birth control for a while 9 months before her big event so nobody spoils her fun? I'm about 99% positive that D didn't purposely get pregnant right now so her due date would overlap with this person's event, and I'm also about 99% sure that D was sincerely sorry when she said she was. She probably does feel bad about overlapping with her friend's event.

[Andara Bledin]

Yegods. You've nailed that one.

I think I'd be inspired to de-friend someone over that, and I rarely de-friend anyone.

^-.-^

[HYHYBT]

This could be read more than one way. Do you know this friend-of-a-friend well enough to know they're not happy, outside of your interpretation of their Facebook comment? Because the remark as you quote it here could at least as well have been intended, while yes, a reference to some conflicting occasion, a joking remark by someone who is genuinely happy for D.

"If I say something that can be taken two ways, and one of them makes you sad or angry, I mean the other one."

[AdminAssistant]

The only thing I can remotely see is if said friend is getting married in September and D is a bridesmaid. In that case, it would be appropriate to ask, "Are you still going to be able to be my bridesmaid or do I need to get someone else?" But not be all passive-aggressive like that. What a bitch.

[Eisa]

Well, yes, if you ever read Etiquette Hell, some people really ARE that petty to want the people in their wedding party to not have ANYTHING EVER!!! even threaten to ruin their big day.

[blas87]

Whatever the reason is, it's beyond petty and immature to act that way.

[MaggieTheCat]

I admit that I don't know D's friend and that her comment may not be petty and she really is happy. But when a statement has "whatever" in it and is followed by multiple "..." it reads (to me, at least) that whatever that person is saying, they are saying it sarcastically. I could be wrong; it's hard to judge people's inflection through text. But I did a LOT of online chatting when I was in middle/high school/college and got pretty good at reading inflection through text, and this person's comment strikes me as very sarcastic and not sincere.

On an unrelated note, it must be baby day in Facebookland, because two more of my friends have announced that they're expecting. >.>

[LadyBarbossa]

While the idea of new pregnancies doesn't thrill me, if the parents and family are happy, I try to at least be happy with/for them. It's THEIR life, after all. If it's the case of a wedding, yes, people can be that petty. I remember when my sister was pregnant with her first son, she was supposed to be a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding but ended up backing out because said friend wanted her to wear high heels even though she would have been 7 or 8 months along at the time of the wedding. WTF!

[Sleepwalker]

Need to know more. What if the pregnant woman had bought a cruise for september?