Not being able to express myself

[Mytical]

I .. am socially inept. While I love discussing things, and even debating things..I have way too much trouble expressing myself. I say one thing, and it is totally different then what I mean to say. This is doubly so in online discussions. Though yes, I am very zen and live and let live, often I will just withdraw from a discussion because of that fact. It irks me, because even though I have a point, I can't make it if nobody understands me.

I hate that. Just want to scream. Yes, I know about Trolls, and flamebaiting. Yet it seems NOBODY can understand my point. Which is very frustrating. Sometimes it is my vocabulary, sometimes my short attention span, and others just plain frustration. I just wish I could convey my thoughts in a coherent manner.

[Ginger Tea]

I just wish I could convey my thoughts in a coherent manner.

You just have.

Why is it doubly so online? With written communication's you can take longer to respond, wording and rewording your response, hoping of corse it doesn't turn into a TL;DR wall of text that might say everything you wanted to convey but no one will take the time to read.

Spoken, I can understand.
You are talking to someone more used to a quickfire style of communication might rush you as you gather your thoughts, this might work if you were a politician being interviewed by the likes of the UK's Jeremy Paxman, looking to ruffle you and hope you bluster out something you wish you haddn't, but if you were not and he or she rushes you for an answere ask them
"Do they want a conversation or an audience for their soap box?"

[Andara Bledin]

Why is it doubly so online?

Tone.

In person one can help set their tone by vocal pitch, expression, and mannerisms. Online. one must take greater care to choose words that express actual intent than in person. It takes much longer to do so with the written word alone.

I've run into this same problem, but it's usually not so much an inability on my part to get the right words out, but being frustrated when the person I'm trying to convey my meaning to either twists what I've said in order to prove that they were right all along or otherwise just cannot, for whatever reason, grasp the concept at all.

^-.-^

[Amanita]

^I've gotten that, and I HATE IT! I remember a catfight I got into on a cosplay forum, and the person giving me the most shit just couldn't seem to understand or listen to a thing I said. But since then, I've observed that that individual comes across as a very self righteous person in general, honestly incapable of debating or discussing things without resorting to personal insults, word twisting, and generally showing one hell of an inability to even try and understand what the other person is really saying.

[purplecat41877]

It really annoys me when someone lectures me for trying to express myself. That person makes me feel like I have no right to do so.

[Eisa]

I soooooooo know what you mean. I am extremely socially awkward and inept. I don't know which is worse for me...probably in person because I am also terrible at coming up with "off the cuff" comments. But at least in person, there is that "tone" and body language...and I can't read it all that well, but at least there's something there...

So yeah I know what you mean, it sucks.

[Mytical]

I can be somewhat sarcastic, and it is very hard to convey sarcasm over the internet. At least without putting a dozen of the rolling eyes smiley. That is just part of it, however. I also have very little brain to mouth filter, only shyness will keep me from saying exactly what I am thinking. However, what comes out is not always what I am thinking, or not as completely as I would prefer. Face to face, I tend to not say a whole lot because of shyness, but I live by a motto. Don't ask me my opinion unless you really want to know. I will not sugar coat it.

What gets me is, I can be very good with words. In stories, poems, etc. Maybe not the best in grammar, but *shrugs*. Yet when it comes to just explaining what I am thinking, I guess my life long shyness just gets to me, and I stumble over the words. Not stuttering, but actually trying to piece together a thought so that I can explain why I think the way I do. Doesn't help that I have the attention span of a Gnat with ADD and tend to ramble.