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(I also posted this @ CS.com, but also wanted to put it here).
My sister. My 5 years younger sister. Where do I begin? How can I convey to those reading this post the animosity I am feeling towards the little asshat?
Growing up, I always viewed myself as getting the short end of the stick. When I was 7/8 years old, I wanted to take ballet lessons. I got swimming lessons instead (and almost drowned thanks to the incompetent teacher). My sister didn't get swim lessons. Nope, she got the dance lessons she wanted.
Then there was the time I wanted to learn how to play clarinet and join the band in elementary school. No money for that. (My dad was an E4 or E5 - can't remember, but he did retire as an E7 in the Air Force after 23 years in). When my sister wanted to take violin and join the school band? Guess what!? They found the money (not sure where/how, but they had it). She took violin for a year. That's it. (After promising to go through middle/high school playing the thing). Though I am seriously thinking of buying myself a second hand clarinet and learning to how play the instrument.
My sister (after a few years of being 'that fat kid' in elementary) lost weight, became popular in school, had to have new clothes every season (at one point, she had so many pieces of clothing, she didn't wear the same thing twice in a month, and always kept a clothing log so she wouldn't).
Me? I've never been popular. I've been nerdy/geeky/dorky - whatever the word to describe people like that. I was the writer/the dreamer/the one in her own little world. My mother never knew what to do with me. I was the "odd" one. (She's told me that I scare her because I read and know a whole bunch of things that other people don't know).
Sister always had guys falling at her feet. She had one guy who was head over heels in love with her. I really thought she was going to marry him. However, he was "only" a mechanic at the local car dealership. Without telling him, she slowly stopped seeing him when she met her first husband, Scum (most definitely not his first name, though the first initial of his name is "S"). Now Scum went to the same high school she & I both graduated from. Actually, he graduated 2 years before me (and I graduated in 1990). I didn't like him. I begged her not to marry Scum, Willy was better and loved her. Scum was just ... scum. I caved because this is what she wanted, this is what my parents wanted, and she was making an "advantageous" match. I was her Maid of Honor at her wedding.
A few years and a miscarriage later, my wedding comes up. She & Scum are having problems. Mr. Rum & I aren't even married a year (and Child Rum hasn't been born yet, but I was pregnant), sister & Scum got divorced.
A few years later, she marries "Malcolm". Malcolm worked for a government contractor at the same facility my sister worked at (she was working for a different government contractor - both companies had people working for the Army at this place). They date, and get married. They have 2 children. "Jessie" and "Jory". Jessie is 3 years old (almost 4) and Jory was born in December 2010.
My mom was watching Jessie for almost 3 years. Then when Jory was born, my mom was watching both for a while. It tired her out, but she loves watching her grandbabies. (She loves to watch Child Rum too, I'm not worried about favoritism). Then Jessie started going to a playschool 2 days a week in preparation for her to start pre-K. Jessie, because of her birthday, wouldn't start kindergarten until almost 6 years old, so my sister wanted to put her into a private kindergarten, however, the one sister has chosen said they'd take Jessie for the kindergarten, but she'd have to start with their pre-K classes. So Jessie is no longer being watched by NanaRum.
So that left Jory with NanaRum. My sister has a rental property and was having problems with her former tenant. Eventually she had to take him to court to get back rent and start the eviction proceedings. Because he was able to pay everything at the court that day, he wasn't evicted, but he left about 1-2 weeks afterward. She needed to rent the house almost immediately, but needed to get the house ready and have a few workmen come in to work on things.
Now, my sister's husband Malcolm works for the federal government and is now in Afghanistan until December (he left in late June/early July). So my sister is "all alone" and "woe is her". Her MIL lives in the house with her but is wracked with various health problems, she's not much help with anything.
My sister had mentioned in passing that she had to get the house ready for her new renters. My mother said, "OK" and left it at though. Figuring that if my sister needed help, she'd open her fat mouth.
She didn't. She expected my parents (and me, though I have never been specified) to say "We'll be at the house, while watching your son, to let the workmen in to your house."
My parents are not mind readers. Because of this breech, my sister has stopped talking to them. Even when she drops Jory off at their house in the mornings. Now, today, I find out, she e-mailed them a one sentence letter saying "You will not have Jory this week."
I'm trying to figure out what is happening to her and to Jory. My mother, has gathered her tattered feelings about her, and won't let me say anything to her. She says I'm the communicator, and I can't burn bridges.
I have never liked my sister. I've always viewed her as shallow, mean, nasty. And this just takes the cake. I have no clue what is going on in her selfish little head, but I'm not having it.
If it was my mother begging me over the phone not to say anything, I would have finished the phone call, called my sister, and yelled at her.
What am I supposed to do? Not only is she hurting her son (who only knows NanaRum & PapaRum as caregivers) but she's hurting my parents by now seriously limiting their contact with her children. (And that's a theme - she's mad at my parents, they don't get to see Jessie and Jory).
Thank y'all for letting me vent.
My sister. My 5 years younger sister. Where do I begin? How can I convey to those reading this post the animosity I am feeling towards the little asshat?
Growing up, I always viewed myself as getting the short end of the stick. When I was 7/8 years old, I wanted to take ballet lessons. I got swimming lessons instead (and almost drowned thanks to the incompetent teacher). My sister didn't get swim lessons. Nope, she got the dance lessons she wanted.
Then there was the time I wanted to learn how to play clarinet and join the band in elementary school. No money for that. (My dad was an E4 or E5 - can't remember, but he did retire as an E7 in the Air Force after 23 years in). When my sister wanted to take violin and join the school band? Guess what!? They found the money (not sure where/how, but they had it). She took violin for a year. That's it. (After promising to go through middle/high school playing the thing). Though I am seriously thinking of buying myself a second hand clarinet and learning to how play the instrument.
My sister (after a few years of being 'that fat kid' in elementary) lost weight, became popular in school, had to have new clothes every season (at one point, she had so many pieces of clothing, she didn't wear the same thing twice in a month, and always kept a clothing log so she wouldn't).
Me? I've never been popular. I've been nerdy/geeky/dorky - whatever the word to describe people like that. I was the writer/the dreamer/the one in her own little world. My mother never knew what to do with me. I was the "odd" one. (She's told me that I scare her because I read and know a whole bunch of things that other people don't know).
Sister always had guys falling at her feet. She had one guy who was head over heels in love with her. I really thought she was going to marry him. However, he was "only" a mechanic at the local car dealership. Without telling him, she slowly stopped seeing him when she met her first husband, Scum (most definitely not his first name, though the first initial of his name is "S"). Now Scum went to the same high school she & I both graduated from. Actually, he graduated 2 years before me (and I graduated in 1990). I didn't like him. I begged her not to marry Scum, Willy was better and loved her. Scum was just ... scum. I caved because this is what she wanted, this is what my parents wanted, and she was making an "advantageous" match. I was her Maid of Honor at her wedding.
A few years and a miscarriage later, my wedding comes up. She & Scum are having problems. Mr. Rum & I aren't even married a year (and Child Rum hasn't been born yet, but I was pregnant), sister & Scum got divorced.
A few years later, she marries "Malcolm". Malcolm worked for a government contractor at the same facility my sister worked at (she was working for a different government contractor - both companies had people working for the Army at this place). They date, and get married. They have 2 children. "Jessie" and "Jory". Jessie is 3 years old (almost 4) and Jory was born in December 2010.
My mom was watching Jessie for almost 3 years. Then when Jory was born, my mom was watching both for a while. It tired her out, but she loves watching her grandbabies. (She loves to watch Child Rum too, I'm not worried about favoritism). Then Jessie started going to a playschool 2 days a week in preparation for her to start pre-K. Jessie, because of her birthday, wouldn't start kindergarten until almost 6 years old, so my sister wanted to put her into a private kindergarten, however, the one sister has chosen said they'd take Jessie for the kindergarten, but she'd have to start with their pre-K classes. So Jessie is no longer being watched by NanaRum.
So that left Jory with NanaRum. My sister has a rental property and was having problems with her former tenant. Eventually she had to take him to court to get back rent and start the eviction proceedings. Because he was able to pay everything at the court that day, he wasn't evicted, but he left about 1-2 weeks afterward. She needed to rent the house almost immediately, but needed to get the house ready and have a few workmen come in to work on things.
Now, my sister's husband Malcolm works for the federal government and is now in Afghanistan until December (he left in late June/early July). So my sister is "all alone" and "woe is her". Her MIL lives in the house with her but is wracked with various health problems, she's not much help with anything.
My sister had mentioned in passing that she had to get the house ready for her new renters. My mother said, "OK" and left it at though. Figuring that if my sister needed help, she'd open her fat mouth.
She didn't. She expected my parents (and me, though I have never been specified) to say "We'll be at the house, while watching your son, to let the workmen in to your house."
My parents are not mind readers. Because of this breech, my sister has stopped talking to them. Even when she drops Jory off at their house in the mornings. Now, today, I find out, she e-mailed them a one sentence letter saying "You will not have Jory this week."
I'm trying to figure out what is happening to her and to Jory. My mother, has gathered her tattered feelings about her, and won't let me say anything to her. She says I'm the communicator, and I can't burn bridges.
I have never liked my sister. I've always viewed her as shallow, mean, nasty. And this just takes the cake. I have no clue what is going on in her selfish little head, but I'm not having it.
If it was my mother begging me over the phone not to say anything, I would have finished the phone call, called my sister, and yelled at her.
What am I supposed to do? Not only is she hurting her son (who only knows NanaRum & PapaRum as caregivers) but she's hurting my parents by now seriously limiting their contact with her children. (And that's a theme - she's mad at my parents, they don't get to see Jessie and Jory).
Thank y'all for letting me vent.
I've been doing the same thing with the wedding. They continue to act like children, we elope.
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