"Sorry I'm Bugging You!"

[Andara Bledin]

Every. fucking. conversation. I mean, does anyone else see something that'd indicate that she's bothering me?

You should turn it around and ask her that. Ask her what about your reply gives her the impression that you don't want to talk to her.

I'd give about a 50/50 chance it's crippling insecurity desperately in need of a good psychiatrist, versus someone looking for an excuse to go mental and the stupid questions are designed to make the other party the aggressor after the fact. I've seen both in action. >_<

^-.-^

[Greenday]

You should turn it around and ask her that. Ask her what about your reply gives her the impression that you don't want to talk to her.

it's crippling insecurity desperately in need of a good psychiatrist

I have. I'll say something like, "No, did I say you were bothering me? Why do you think you are bothering me?" And she always comes up with some random BS and I tell her to stop but it never happens.

And I'm pretty sure that is definitely true.

[blas87]

I just change the subject or try to go on otherwise with the convo. I've found with the extremely insecure, just changing the subject or moving it along in another direction kind of works in trying to get things going in a better direction and less of "Me me me me! Why are you ignoring MEEEE?"

Like whenever my delicate flower bf is having a pity party (unrelated to the "bugging you" stuff), I just keep telling whatever story I was telling, ignoring his side comments and rude remarks about who I am talking about and the negative attitude, and he'll either get so frustrated he'll go pout in the corner and ignore me for several hours, or sometimes he'll come around and realize I'm not of any mood to listen to his pity party over something he can easily fix or change.

[DrFaroohk]

I don't usually necro threads, and this one aint THAT old...

But does anyone find it a little funny? People have self esteem issues. Especially around someone who is their superior in some way. So, they feel the need to apologize, let the superior know they truly are sorry to be disturbing them because again, they feel totally worthless in their day to day lives that they have to apologize merely for speaking....


And someone thinks the best way to counteract that is to compound the problem. "How dare you waste my time by uttering an extra 4 words? That took almost 4 seconds out of my day! My precious and valuable time was WASTED AWAY by YOU, MAGGOT!!!! ARG!"

Is that what one would call...Irony?

[the_std]

Maybe if someone had reacted the way you just completely fabricated, I would agree that it were a tad... Silly, but not ironic. But when you are a stronger personality type, dealing with self-deprecation and lousy self-esteem being inflicted on you for something you absolutely haven't done, it is annoying as hell. I understand this from both sides, cause when I was younger I was the whiniest, most pathetic person you'd ever met because I truly believed that I was a worthless piece of scum.

But with therapy and the support of both my friends and my family, I came around and saw how wrong I was. And talking to friends a few years later, I came to realize just how goddamn annoying I was about it. So while I have some sympathy for the people who have those feelings, I will only tolerate it if they're making an active effort to improve themselves. This is what my friends did for me, and I know how much it helped me, so I'm only going to offer the same to other people. My close friends and family will get more leniency from me, but acquaintances and strangers will get my foot coming down pretty damn quickly.

[blas87]

What std said. Everything she said.

I had a major attitude problem in my later teens that went into my early 20s and with that was a super whiney emotionally 16 year old girl with a horrible victim mentality. I've never been so insecure that I thought I wasn't worth anything, but I used to whine and make nearly every single damn thing about myself, and I used to honestly believe that every action someone did was against ME personally, to spite me or hurt me. I honestly thought that everyone had it out for me.

And reflecting on it, I can see just how annoying and awful I was to be around. I still am not perfect by any means, but I now am able to see the difference between a real issue and someone who just says something or does something. It isn't about me, or towards me. I don't blow up when people don't coddle and reassure me until I am able to sleep (so to speak).

But, if I may whine, I think being forced to be around these types of people at work, and being dumb and choosing to associate with a few people outside of work of that nature, I'm getting a dose of my own medicine as to how I used to treat others.

[blas87]

In relation to another thread, someone at work chose to just ruin my day and make me uncomfortable and ask me "If you were single, would you date me?" via PM on FB.

I didn't get it immediately, because I tend to flop every few mins between here, CS, FB, and whatever I'm looking up on Google. Plus, I was in the bathroom I'm sure, went out to smoke, probably wiped the kitchen counter off and tidied up my room a bit from the past week. Just becuase the computer is on doesn't mean I'm. Always. On. In fact, I'm invisible on FB because some people just couldn't get the hint that I'm not always able to have 3 hour conversations.

So it had been sitting in my PM box for a good while, and after it, it said "Well I guess the answer's no then."

And I just answered "I'm not going to talk about that, it makes me uncomfortable."

And then I went to bed. It was getting late. I didn't feel any need to say a "proper goodbye".

Wasn't online all day today. And I come home tonight and I had no less than 10 "I'm so sorry!" messages, and two "Are you ever going to talk to me again?" messages.

I replied "I wasn't home today. Don't worry about it. We will pretend it never happened ok?"

And then "I'm so sorry." "I'm sorry." "Are you ever going to talk to me again?"

Seriously...people....therapy. It's covered under insurance.

Edit: I'm on a ROLL tonight!

I got a text "I will talk to you later if you're not too busy!" (there's a backstory to "too busy") and I remarked "I am NEVER too busy for ANYTHING." to which I was "reminded" that I put this person on the backburner all the time (whatever). So I explained, for the second or third time, how things go. And they just whined "FINE, I'll NEVER bug you again!"

Ok. Holding you to it. Oh wait. Nope. Few hours later, you were back.