Smoking Rant

[blas87]

And with that, I want to tell them to fuck off.

It's not the healthiest or smartest thing to do, but they can look at it as me nagging them to give up something they love to do and feel comforted by.

That, and just nagging someone to quit, wow, that sure works wonders! Telling someone every time they light up that you don't like it, making little hand gestures or plugging your nose, yah, that really gets the point across.

[bex1218]

As for nagging a smoker, general nagging okay fine. But if someone that actually cares about you is nagging, they're nagging because you're killing yourself in front of them. So maybe cut them some slack? >.>

As I said in my op, I don't mind it once in a while. But my friends and family don't egg on like total strangers. ANd its the constance of it. I know its an unhealthy habit. I never for one second thought it was good for you.

[kamn]

What I don't get is the demonisation of smoking. Yes, its bad, I get it, we all get it. It can (notice the word CAN, not WILL) cause cancer, slowly damage and destroy your lungs, as well as a few other medical concerns. But, lets be realistic here, so can just about anything else. Its not like nocitine is the essence of Death or something.

Why does everyone constantly prey on the negatives of smoking? Why does no one mention the good sides? If you are asking, "what good sides?", consider, please, what smoking can do. It forcefully stills the body and most times, the mind into a rythm, it relaxes a person. A GREAT thing for anyone who has just been through a traumatic experience, to help them make better decisions and to slightly speed up the recovery process (where applicable). For those around homeless, it reduces lice and flea infections, for the dieting ones, it helps curb appetite (although just a bit) and a few studies suggest it might help with Alzheimer and insulin dependence.

I can attest to the psychological effect, even if it just a few people. My mother used to smoke HEAVILY. Some days, I couldn't see the hand in front of my face when I walked into the kitchen, the smoke was that thick. But, she was calm, collected, happy to help, to do what needed to be done. If something upset her, she grabbed a smoke. I began suspecting that smoking actually helped her, when she got off. Now, she literally can't go for more than 5 days without shouting, yelling and complaining. My father similarly, only smokes when drunk now. But as a side to it, he is far more reclused. I hadn't really seen him in more than 2 months, before I moved out. And we lived in the same apartment.

So to all the smokers out there: If you think it helps you, keep at it! And screw the idiots telling you that you MUST stop smoking. Its your body, its your choice, its YOU that will suffer (most) the consequences. What they are getting is less than they get from bloody car exhaust/bad oil from their Mc'D!

[Andara Bledin]

What I don't get is the demonisation of smoking. Yes, its bad, I get it, we all get it. It can (notice the word CAN, not WILL) cause cancer, slowly damage and destroy your lungs, as well as a few other medical concerns.

Slight correction: smoking does not cause cancer - it will increase your risk of developing cancer. Both my old boss and my current boss were vehemently anti-smoking and both had cancer. My mother and aunt have been smoking for the last 45 years and both are cancer-free. So goes the genetic lottery.

As mentioned, nobody doesn't know that smoking is bad for you. It's actually gotten to the saturation point where it's so prevalent that we've probably stopped even seeing the warnings. >_<

(totally aside, but dude's you really need to get your junk checked regularly - my old boss could have been treated and been totally cancer-free if he'd gotten the exam done instead of being discovered late, having to go through treatment that made him feel like he'd rather be dead, and eventually suffocating because his lungs filled up with fluid... current boss is much more pro-active and despite having a much less treatable cancer, is still alive and well after treatment)

^-.-^

[dragon_wings]

I'm not a smoker but my boyfriend is, my brother is, my ex is, and I have a lot of friends that do. I have no problem with it as long as you don't blow the smoke in my face or smoke in my house/car. Unfortunately it seems that the smoke always gravitates towards me. Lol.
Everyone I know that smoke has been respectful to my not wanting to breathe it in, except my ex who would blow smoke in my direction just to annoy me.
I would never lecture my boyfriend or brother on not smoking so why would I lecture my friends. And I used to buy my ex her smokes (cause I worked at a place that sold them and she had no money... fucking mooching bitch).

[guywithashovel]

This is similar to the threads we've had about people who are really stuck up about eating healthy and will jump on people's cases if they catch them eating something that they deem "unhealthy." I have an ex-coworker who is like that, and I've posted about her before.

When it comes to people who are really overbearing about smoking, diet, or whatever, I've noticed something about them. They usually have quite a few glaring imperfections in their lives, and the lecturing and nagging about diet, smoking, etc. is usually their way of compensating for their other faults.

Take my former coworker, for example. She really likes making sure everyone knows that she runs every day, goes to the gym regularly, and eats healthy food. And if she catches anyone eating anything she deems unhealthy, she gets on their cases about it---especially if she catches you eating McD's. Apparently, that's a cardinal sin in her book. Oh, soda too. If you ever drink soda around her, she'll have to harp about how she NEVER drinks soda.

But you want to know some other things about her? She pays around $200 per month in car insurance---all because of her lackluster driving record. Heck, one time, she had two or three unpaid speeding tickets, and there was a warrant out for her arrest. She also can't manage money, mainly because she's constantly going to the malls (the pricey malls, to boot) to buy new clothes.

So, I guess if someone is giving you a hard time for smoking, eating something that is "unhealthy," or whatever, you can just take a careful look at them, find their faults, and nag them about those faults in return.

[blas87]

I can't really nag my bf, because he never leaves the house except to work and go to the store or to get fast food. I could tell him that if I asked him to quit playing video games, how would he feel.

I'm going to have to cut down anyway, moving back home soon. I will probably only be smoking on my way to work and on break, maybe if I happen to need to run an errand or if I want to go back to the bigger city on my days off to shop or go out to eat with the bf.

I don't smoke at his house no matter how itchy and antsy I get, cuz I don't want his ma or his little brother to see me doing it. That, and no matter how much he wants to grouse at me for smoking at my own apartment or in my own car, I'll give him the respect to not smoke at his house, won't even go out in the driveway or by the road.

I have smoked at my parents' house when no one was home. Had to walk all the way into the backyard and out into the woods. Not fun. Not worth it.

[Greenday]

the lecturing and nagging about diet, smoking, etc. is usually their way of compensating for their other faults.

I find that it's usually due to actual concern for the other person's health. For instance, by the time I was born, one of my grandfathers was already dead thanks to smoking (lung cancer). Never had a chance to meet him. My other grandfather smoked for 50 years. Quit, still got emphysema from it, and for years suffered, barely able to breathe or do anything without an oxygen tank. Constant trips to the hospital. After everything he'd been through (two wars, plane crash, hit by cars, severe burning from fire, in a car in a lake, etc. etc.), it was something so stupid as letting his addiction to smoking getting the better of him that did him in.

In this day and age, most people probably know someone who died as a result of smoking. And for those of us who've watched people literally suffer as a result, we don't want to see our close friends and family go through that. There are people on this board that I feel close to that I've never met but would be destroyed to hear that they are going through this later on in their lives. So maybe we do say something about their smoking every now and then. Maybe the message will finally sink in because even if you claim you know, if you keep doing it, the message obviously hasn't been delivered.

[bex1218]

I wish i could get more people who feel more concern, than the naggers who just like to nag. Some people know, but just don't care and are selfish, like me. I will downright admit I am being selfish about it. I can quit anytime, I just don't chose to.

[Andara Bledin]

In this day and age, most people probably know someone who died as a result of smoking. And for those of us who've watched people literally suffer as a result, we don't want to see our close friends and family go through that.

My old boss was one of those. He's the one that died of cancer. Even he admitted to the irony of that.

^-.-^

[blas87]

Ya know, I keep hearing that argument about "but we care about you and don't want to see you kill yourself"......and really, that doesn't justify the constant nagging. Nagging is annoying. Do you people not realize that? Do you think smokers can just pop a switch, aww gee, Greenday doesn't want me to die, ok, last cigg forever now! Yah, I don't think so. I know it's bad for me, do you think that makes me stop? Of course not.

You want me to quit? You gonna pay for a custom diet for me so I don't eat everything in sight? Are you going to be my therapist or get me anxiety medication when I can't smoke when I get upset? You still gonna love me when of course that's a silly thing to ask, so I not only go nuts but gain 20 or more lbs?

I treat people nagging me the way my mom sighs and huffs when my dad goes into the fridge for a beer, the way a family member might make a rude remark about their overweight friend not watching their diet.

Though, it works extremely well, whenever people like my bf want to harp, say I'm walking to my locker to get my purse with my smokes in it for lunch, he'll make a rude comment like "Get those ciggs to eat now, hurry!" and all I do is go "Uh huh" or "Yup" or "Yum". Those people are almost always expecting some defensive lashback, and I'm not giving anyone like that that kind of privilege.

Anyone who makes comments about "Oh, she ate, she HAS to go smoke now!" looking at me, anticipating some hateful response, usually gets only a "Yep, be right back!" answer from me.

[Lace Neil Singer]

Ya know, I keep hearing that argument about "but we care about you and don't want to see you kill yourself"

I could say the same about people who drive. I can't drive, and don't even ride a motorbike any more since I moved into town. The news doesn't go by without a report on a car accident, or a pedestrian being hit by a car. Perhaps I should start nagging people to quit driving and get rid of their car, it being so potentially dangerous and all. Plus, if they stopped driving and instead walked everywhere, they'd be so much healthier!

But no, I won't do that. Cuz I'm not a bitch. I choose to smoke cuz it relaxes me and I don't smoke all the time. A few a day is enough for me, and I'm considerate and don't smoke around kids or nonsmokers.

[DrFaroohk]

The thing with nagging is it's pointless. There is no good reason to ever nag someone.

Why?

Because they heard you the first time! They heard you, they processed the information and acknowledged you. Now it's time to move along. Every time you nag, you increase their resentment towards you by +1 and use any influence you have with them by -1. You're just ASKING to be ignored by nagging.

[guywithashovel]

I have relatives who've died from illnesses that were caused by smoking.

In fact, I can show you three death certificates that probably wouldn't be there if the people could have just thrown down the cigarettes.

Still, I don't pester people about smoking. As others have pointed out, nagging rarely does any good. If adults want to do something, they're going to do it.

I'm sure some people are concerned about others' health, but I really think that most of the naggers aren't. Take my former coworker for example. She prides herself on being bossy and overbearing, and nagging people about their food choices is something that allows her to exercise those traits. Also, since she has quite a few skeletons in her closet (e.g. the poor driving record), she really doesn't have much business getting on others' cases.

However, I do want to roll my eyes when a smoker claims to have gone to the doctor and the doctor said that he or she "has the lungs of a twenty year-old nonsmoker," especially if that person has smoked for many years. Seriously, there is no way that can be true. Anyone with the foggiest understanding of science knows it, so stop saying it.

[Greenday]

Ya know, I keep hearing that argument about "but we care about you and don't want to see you kill yourself"......and really, that doesn't justify the constant nagging. Nagging is annoying. Do you people not realize that? Do you think smokers can just pop a switch, aww gee, Greenday doesn't want me to die, ok, last cigg forever now! Yah, I don't think so. I know it's bad for me, do you think that makes me stop? Of course not.

You want me to quit? You gonna pay for a custom diet for me so I don't eat everything in sight? Are you going to be my therapist or get me anxiety medication when I can't smoke when I get upset? You still gonna love me when of course that's a silly thing to ask, so I not only go nuts but gain 20 or more lbs?

It's an addiction, I understand that you can't just flip a switch and be done with it. I can be your therapist if you want. I already play therapist to most of my friends and I don't even charge them. And seeing how I do care about what happens to you despite never having seen you, do you think if you gained 20 lbs that would somehow change that?

I'm not saying constantly nagging is a good idea or that people should do it. I'm just saying that sometimes we nag every now and then because we do care.

I could say the same about people who drive. I can't drive, and don't even ride a motorbike any more since I moved into town. The news doesn't go by without a report on a car accident, or a pedestrian being hit by a car. Perhaps I should start nagging people to quit driving and get rid of their car, it being so potentially dangerous and all. Plus, if they stopped driving and instead walked everywhere, they'd be so much healthier!

Except that's an apples to orange comparison. Driving is useful and practical. In bad weather, it's healthier than walking.